The Top 10 Songs of All Time.. ABOUT MASTURBATING!

Discussion in 'Et Cetera, Et Cetera' started by blackbooty1, Dec 5, 2010.

  1. blackbooty1

    blackbooty1 New Member

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    enjoy the list and for more see this blog!
    ! Crazy Hot Tracks - Hip Hop, R&B, Rock And Soul Blog!: The Top 10 Songs About Masturbation! Say What?

    10. Touch Of My Hand - Britney Spears - 2003 ..Yep she went there even in her pre-melt down cleaner image
    YouTube - Britney Spears - Touch of my hand

    9. Fingers - Pink - 2006I let my fingers do the walking to her "Pink" how ironic!
    YouTube - Pink- Fingers

    8. The Reflex - Duran Duran - 1984... Whey dont you use it, try not to bruise it. case closed
    YouTube - Duran Duran - The Reflex 1984

    7. I Touch Myself - The Devinyls - 1991... So smooth it sounds too romantic to be this filthy
    YouTube - Divinyls - I Touch Myself

    6. Dancing With Myself - Billy Idol - 1980... Oh? thats what he meant, Billy loved the double entendre
    YouTube - Billy Idol - Dancing With Myself

    5. TURNING JAPANESE - THE VAPORS - 1980
    (as in you squint so hard when you are about bust and therefore look Japanese)
    YouTube - The Vapors - Turning Japanese


    4. DARLING NIKKI - PRINCE - 1984
    you cant have a freaky music list without his royal badness!
    YouTube - Prince/The Revolution - Darling Nikki


    3. BEAT IT - MICHAEL JACKSON - 1983
    (all that heavy breathing and saying Beat it over and over.. i dont think it means Beat it as in LEAVE but Beat it another way)
    YouTube - Michael Jackson - Beat It

    2. SHE BOP - CYNDI LAUPER - 1984
    YouTube - Cyndi Lauper - She Bop

    1. OOPS OH MY - TWEET (Featuring Missy Elliot) 2002
    Timbaland produced funk jam that went to a place that most R&B favorite tracks dont dare to go
    YouTube - Tweet feat. Missy Elliott - Oops (Oh My)
     
  2. Joll

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    Divinyls was the best, lol.
     
  3. B_Hickboy

    B_Hickboy New Member

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    That twinge in your intestines
    #3 B_Hickboy, Dec 5, 2010
    Last edited by a moderator: Dec 5, 2010
  4. Catchoftheday

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  5. nudeyorker

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  6. sargon20

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    Hard to believe 'Beat It' is on the list.
     
  7. Joll

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    I think Madge's 'Where Life Begins' was about cunnilingus. Not masturbation tho, I guess.
     
  8. maxcok

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  9. Bbucko

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    Despite its 25 year age, I'd never seen Cyndi's She Bop vid before: it's kind of a wow.

    No matter what this song was about the first time, when it was covered by Boston's legendary Human Sexual Response in the early 80s, it was about one thing only: jerking off.

    Extra points for arm dancing all around.
     
  10. concupisys

    concupisys Active Member

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  11. blackbooty1

    blackbooty1 New Member

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    Slow Hand is the Pointers Sister Foreplay song, shes not touching herself shes talking about a man touching her and not being in a hurry. there biggest hit is Im So Excited which about a massive orgasm while having sex!

    the Sisters had a really filthy catalog but had to word differently in there era of the 70's and 80's (when you had to use certain code works) this was before they allowed more explicit stuff on the radio which started in the early 90's
     
  12. Stretch

    Stretch New Member

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    You also missed:

    "Icicle"-Tori Amos

    YouTube - Tori Amos Icicle Live

    "And when my hand touches myself,
    I can finally rest my head.
    And when they take from his body,
    I think I'll take from mine instead,
    Getting off, getting off while they're all downstairs."

    "My Ding-a-Ling" - Chuck Berry

    YouTube - Cuck Berry - My Ding-A-Ling

    YouTube - My Dingaling

    "When I was little boy in grammar school,
    Always went by the very best rule,
    But every time the bell would ring,
    You'd catch me playing with my ding-a-ling."

    "Orgasm Addict" - The Buzzcocks

    YouTube - Buzzcocks-Orgasm Addict

    "Well you tried it just for once found it all right for kicks,
    But now you found out that it's a habit that sticks,
    And you're an orgasm addict, you're an orgasm addict,
    Sneaking in the back door with dirty magazines.
    Now your mother wants to know what all those stains on your jeans."

    "Blister in the Sun" - Violent Femmes

    YouTube - VIOLENT FEMMES-Blister in the Sun

    "Let me go on, like I blister in the sun,
    Let me go on, big hands I know your the one.
    Body and beats, I stain my sheets,
    I don't even know why."



    "Pump It Up" - Elvis Costello

    YouTube - Elvis Costello - Pump it up

    "Down in the pleasure centers,
    Hell bent or heaven sent,
    Listen to the propaganda,
    Listen to the latest slander.
    There's nothing underhand,
    That she wouldn't understand.
    Pump it up until you can feel it.
    Pump it up when you don't really need it."

    And finally(for now)...for your listening pleasure


    "I'm A Wanker" - Ivor Biggun and the Winkers

    YouTube - I'm A Wanker (Ivor Biggun)
    http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=e8vHY43hb0E



    "My mother said
    that I never should
    never play with the naughty rude girls in the wood
    Their giggling talk I could never understood
    And that's why I fell in love with my right hand

    (Chorus)
    And that's why
    I'm a wanker
    I'm a wanker
    And does it good like it bloody well should
    I'm a wanker
    I'm a wanker
    And I'm always pulling my pudd

    I was 25 years old
    before I was kissed
    and then I found the guy preferred
    a swift one off the wrist
    Its cheap and convenient
    and you cant catch VD
    Its available at anytime and its absolutely free

    (Chorus)

    Oh Mrs Palm
    and your 5 lovely daughters
    Thank you for having me
    and being oh so kind
    I've got pains in my arms
    and my donkeys growing shorter
    My knees have turnt to water
    And I think im going blind

    I've wanked over Italy
    I've wanked over Spain
    I've wanked in an omnibus
    I've even had a wank in a train

    I've used a badger
    and a lemon
    and a cat
    a inflatable Linda Lovelace
    and a David Crockett hat

    (Chorus)

    Oh Mrs Palm
    and your 5 lovely daughters
    Thank you for having me
    and being oh so kind
    I've pains in my arms
    and my donkeys growing shorter
    My knees have turned to water
    And I think I'm going blind"

    (Chorus)









     
  13. blackbooty1

    blackbooty1 New Member

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  14. maxcok

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    It's still masturbation - "manual stimulation of the genital organs (of yourself or another) for sexual pleasure".
     
  15. B_Lightkeeper

    B_Lightkeeper New Member

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    There is an old, old song something about it's a treat to beat your feet in the mississippi mud." and we use to substitute meat for feet.
     
  16. Autofellatio

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    I'm guessing a significant number of songs by Blood On The Dance Floor might contain references to masturbation LOL

    They do have plenty of blowjob references, that's for sure :)
     
  17. sitharee

    sitharee New Member

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    Um, "The Stroke" by Billy Squire?
     
  18. lux51

    lux51 Active Member

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    "Masturbation Blues" by, Candye Kane. Enough Said
     
  19. jsn649

    jsn649 Member

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  20. ronin001

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    All time best Song by Clarence Carter

    YouTube - Strokin' Music Video

    When I start makin' love I don't just make love... I be strokin'
    That's what I be doin', huh
    I be strokin'
    I stroke it to the east
    And I stroke it to the west
    And I stroke it to the woman that I love the best
    I be strokin'
    Let me ask you somethin'...
    What time of the day do you like to make love
    Have you ever made love just before breakfast
    Have you ever made love while you watched the late, late show
    Well, let me ask you this
    Have you ever made love on a couch
    Well, let me ask you this
    Have you ever made love on the back seat of a car
    I remember one time I made love on the back seat of a car
    And the police came and shined his light on me, and I said:
    I'm strokin', that's what I'm doin', I be strokin'
    I stroke it to the east
    And I stroke it to the west
    And I stroke it to the woman that I love the best
    I be strokin'
    Let me ask you something...
    How long has it been since you made love, huh?
    Did you make love yesterday
    Did you make love last week
    Did you make love last year
    Or maybe it might be that you plannin' on makin' love tonight
    But just remember, when you start making love
    You make it hard, long, soft, short
    And be strokin'
    I be strokin'
    I stroke it to the east
    And I stroke it to the west
    And I stroke it to the woman that I love the best, huh
    I be strokin'
    Now when I start making love to my woman
    I don't stop until I know she's sas-ified
    And I can always tell when she gets sas-ified
    'Cause when she gets sas-fied she start calling my name
    She'd say: 'Clarence Carter, Clarence Carter, Clarence Carter
    Clarence Carter, ooooh shit, Clarence Carter'
    The other night I was strokin' my woman
    And it got so good to her, you know what she told me
    Let me tell you what she told me, she said:
    'Stroke it Clarence Carter, but don't stroke so fast
    If my stuff ain't tight enough, you can stick it up my...' WOO!
    I be strokin' Ha! Ha! Ha! Ha!
    I be strokin'
    I stroke it to the east
    And I stroke it to the west
    And I stroke it to the woman that I love the best, huh
    I be strokin'
    I be strokin' Ha! Ha! Ha! Ha!
    I be strokin', Yeah!
    I be strokin'
    I stroke it to the north
    I stroke it to the south
    I stroke it everywhere
    I even stroke it with my... Woo!
    I be strokin'
    I be strokin' Ha! Ha!
    I be strokin'
     
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