The Trip to Mexico

[D_N Flay Table]

I think this should be posted here, unsure.. but here goes...

So my GF's friend has decided to get married in Mexico. *To save money.
Here is the catch....

This has caused a HUGE rift between my GF and I.
I am refusing to go to Mexico based on the advice from a close friend that owns a travel agency. To quote her: "I have canceled all my clients trips to Mexico, it isn't safe to go down there" -This only after one of her clients son's was murdered by mexican police.

So my GF is really upset that I put my foot down on this one. She says I am "Crazy" for not wanting to go. She isn't even IN the wedding, just a guest of one of her "BEST FRIENDS".

Here is my stance.

1. in THIS economy when everyone is BROKE, *I know I am... who the fuck plans a destination wedding and doesn't pay for their guests?
The whole trip is going to cost around $1700 and I called the hotel, and they told me that we "Must stay in the confines of the hotel at all times, and not leave the hotel compound" FUCK THAT SHIT.
I feel it is very selfish of this girl to plan a wedding that people have to pay to attend, just to feed her fucking ego.

2. Mexico is a warzone right now. I have kids. I am not putting my life in any undue danger to go somewhere that is unsafe.



So what do you think?
Am I being unreasonable?

 

[ruffboy]

notta tall, your logic is sound. i don't think the bride/groom have to pay for anyone to attend anything, but no one should at all feel obligated and they should understand how their decisions impact others or they're just assholes. sounds like you have as much an issue with the bride as the gf here. i have mucho familia who live near mexico and used to go there with astonishing regularity, now, not at all, its fucked up there and no good end in sight yet. the gf hopefully is just having a quick reaction thingy and will accept and respect your decision, especially in light of kids, but she's gotta make her own and have it respected too, no matter how 'crazy' it might be ;-p

tell her to come to hawaii though, we really need the tourism money too!! ;-p

 

[B_dxjnorto]

Completely understand your position. It's risky getting on the freeway too. Let your girlfriend pay for it.

 

[Golfbuddy]

Let's see -- in the past couple of years 23,000 (!!!!) Mexicans have been killed in uncontrolled gang violence. Many beheaded and tortured. Last weekend, 22 murders occurred within 12 miles of the US border. Tourists have been killed in Acapulco recently. Mexico is a shithole of a country. It's politicians and police are incredibly corrupt. Would I go there for a wedding? Not under any circumstance. If that country ever gets it's act together it would be a nice place to visit and travel in. But that's many years off. And people wonder why Arizona passed that law?

 

[alwaysguessing]

Totally reasonable. Your gf does not have the right to make you waste money or risk your life.

At my girlfriend's request, I'm accompanying her to a wedding, and she is paying for everything, even new clothes for me!

 

[HiddenLacey]

I think its reasonable. If it is that important to her and she feels that comfortable going she can go and you can stay behind.

 

[D_N Flay Table]

notta tall, your logic is sound. i don't think the bride/groom have to pay for anyone to attend anything, but no one should at all feel obligated and they should understand how their decisions impact others or they're just assholes. sounds like you have as much an issue with the bride as the gf here. i have mucho familia who live near mexico and used to go there with astonishing regularity, now, not at all, its fucked up there and no good end in sight yet. the gf hopefully is just having a quick reaction thingy and will accept and respect your decision, especially in light of kids, but she's gotta make her own and have it respected too, no matter how 'crazy' it might be ;-p

tell her to come to hawaii though, we really need the tourism money too!! ;-p

I offered to take her to Hawaii instead. And buy those assholes a toaster.

 

[B_dxjnorto]

In the United States *every* year, more people die on our freeways than in the Vietnam War -- more than 50,000. More than 90,000 die *every* year due to medical errors.

 

[D_N Flay Table]

In the United States *every* year, more people die on our freeways than in the Vietnam War -- more than 50,000. More than 90,000 die *every* year due to medical errors.

True. But I am still not going to messico.

 

[B_dxjnorto]

True. But I am still not going to messico.

Don't have to. I'm just putting it in perspective. Stay away from drug traders in Mexico and you are little more likely to be killed by stray bullets on the border than in L.A.

 

[CUBE]

Hawaii will be WAY more fun. Weddings are over rated

 

[B_dxjnorto]

Weddings are over rated

Completely. I put them right up there with funerals.

 

[D_N Flay Table]

I have to go to dinner with the couple tomorrow night. I can't wait to tell them I a not going.

 

[CUBE]

Oh, I want to add something I think when people throw a wedding and travel is involved (especially out of the country) then they shouldn't be shocked when people can't attend. If I want to have a wedding in Italy, I have to go in with the idea very few people will follow us there. If I want my friends and family at the wedding, I have to make the location choice with them in mind. That said, I think making the trek out of country is usually a poor choice unless I can afford to fly everyone. I could never ask someone to spend the little vacation time they get each year...and the money for that vacation...on my wedding date. At that point, I want to fuck the groom and the best man to get some return on that plane ticket.

 

[D_N Flay Table]

I agree. The attitude they have is "its only 1700 dollars!" I think what they fail to mention is that They will be staying for free because I am sure the hotel is Comping their rooms because of the large block they got for the wedding. And to expect people to to another country when the economy is in the toilet is ricockulous.
I am unemployed. A couple of the other guests are unemployed. The brides family is rich so I sure she didn't give it a second thought while planning. I will enjoy paying off my credicards as apposed to being a part of this ultimate display of Narcissus. If my gal doesn't like it tough titties. She can go by herself.

 

[D_N Flay Table]

I agree. The attitude they have is "its only 1700 dollars!" I think what they fail to mention is that They will be staying for free because I am sure the hotel is Comping their rooms because of the large block they got for the wedding. And to expect people to to another country when the economy is in the toilet is ricockulous.
I am unemployed. A couple of the other guests are unemployed. The brides family is rich so I sure she didn't give it a second thought while planning. I will enjoy paying off my credicards as apposed to being a part of this ultimate display of Narcissus. If my gal doesn't like it tough titties. She can go by herself.

 

[nudeyorker]

You are being very reasonable. I would not go if they offered to pay my expenses. PM when you are in Hawaii!
I'm surprised they have not arranged to have a post weeding reception in LA for the people who can't attend.

 

[ruffboy]

I offered to take her to Hawaii instead. And buy those assholes a toaster.

tell them they can pick up their toaster in hawaii, you registered them at the ABC store

 

[D_N Flay Table]

tell them they can pick up their toaster in hawaii, you registered them at the ABC store

In waipahu!! Lol

 

[dreamer20]

So my GF is really upset that I put my foot down on this one. She says I am "Crazy" for not wanting to go. She isn't even IN the wedding, just a guest of one of her "BEST FRIENDS"...

Am I being unreasonable?

The attitude they have is "its only 1700 dollars!" ...I am unemployed...She can go by herself.

You aren't a relative or acquaintance of the family. You are not being unreasonable. Don't go. She can go off to the wedding and should respect your decision not to.