The unofficial gay/str8/bi FAQ

[rebelmen]

Interesting topic. I've spent a long time trying to understand sexuality, especially mine. I've recently overcome any homosexual attraction I thought I had. I can't speak for anyone else, but for me, homosexual attractions weren't problems, but symptoms of an underlying problem. When I resolved that issue, the attractions began to be corrected.

 

[hungthickdc]

Interesting topic. I've spent a long time trying to understand sexuality, especially mine. I've recently overcome any homosexual attraction I thought I had. I can't speak for anyone else, but for me, homosexual attractions weren't problems, but symptoms of an underlying problem. When I resolved that issue, the attractions began to be corrected.

HUH? I'm not quite following...maybe you should have told us what the underlying problem was. But when you say you've "overcome" homosexual attraction, you've resolved issues and "corrected" the attraction problem it certainly sounds like you felt homosexual attraction was indeed a problem. Hmm.. I think I just confused myself!

 

[rebelmen]

HUH? I'm not quite following...maybe you should have told us what the underlying problem was. But when you say you've "overcome" homosexual attraction, you've resolved issues and "corrected" the attraction problem it certainly sounds like you felt homosexual attraction was indeed a problem. Hmm.. I think I just confused myself!

Yea you have. The attractions weren't the problem, as I clearly stated. I had an emotional/identity issue that I had been unaware of. This was manifesting itself in a few different ways, including what I perceived as same sex attraction. Once I was able to resolve my problem, my sexual identity became clear and I no longer had same sex attractions. Its very similar what a lot of members of the "ex-gay" groups claim to have gone through, I think.

 

[husky14620]

Two words Dave; Fundamental Christianity

As long as those bastards are allowed to base their hateful argument on several out-of-context references to "men lying with men" Amerikuns will think themselves justified in legitimizing organized condemnation.

Of all the "civilized" or "modern" nations on this globe we're the least tolerant.

Odd isn't it since we were settled (early-on) by those who'd suffered directly from the marginalization of intolerance.........

But you forget that those settlers were mostly the religious zealots who were being driven out for their own intolerance or their own strict interpretations. An excellent ongoing example, nearly unchanged in the 300+ years they've been in North America are the Amish. They even shun their own children if the children don't choose to obey the faith at the age of majority. While they are wonderful people, and very non-judgemental for such a strictly religious group, they ARE very strict in their belief. As were the pilgrims, and many other sects that came west in the 17th century.

Also, much of the world, including the U.S. is being manipulated by certain religious fundamentalists for reasons of power. The Xtian "right" in the U.S., the Imams and Mullahs of radical Islam in the Middle and Far East. In many Islamic countries, gay men are put to death. There are certainly some Xtian leaders here in the U.S. who would like to do that here as well, but there is still "some" semblance of the rule of law here, for now.

In contrast, most of Europe and Canada are less influenced by "the church", and fundamentalism in general.

I don't believe for one minute that all this growth in religiousity, and fundamentalism, is about a true belief in God. It is my belief that this is more about control, power, and fear. Religion has always historically been used to control the people, usually to the benefit of a select few. After all, one need only look to the Vatican to see the accumulation of wealth, in the form of art pieces and "artifacts", many made of gold and precious gems, to see that accumulating this wealth is at least as important as doing good works. And check out the mega-churches, with their multi-million dollar buildings, expensive vehicles for the pastors, elaborate multi-media systems in their chapels, and it becomes obvious that the emphasis is on accumulating wealth, not sharing it.

As ordinary individuals find survival getting harder, money tighter, stress levels higher, the become afraid for the future. Their fear makes them easy to manipulate. They are looking for someone to blame, and these "religious leaders" provide the simple, easy answers so many are seeking. The mullahs blame the West, Israel, and "the Jews" for all that is wrong in the Middle East. The bible thumpers blame abortion, divorce, the "faggots, lezzies and queers" for all that is wrong in the U.S. today. They each use words and images designed to elicit feelings of hate for their target groups. And it takes a strong, and independent, mind to resist such "programming". They never blame, or even acknowledge the growing disparity in wealth, both within their (or our) own countries, and between countries in the world. Nothing is ever done to address the increasing lack of power people have over their own lives, other than assign blame to that "other".

 

[dannymawg]

because it deserves a bump...

 

[B_josiah852]

Do you mean according to statistics that all those str8 guys who gave me blow jobs just to see what it would be like, really was gay ?

 

[fortiesfun]

Do you mean according to statistics that all those str8 guys who gave me blow jobs just to see what it would be like, really was gay ?

I can't think of a single sentence in the FAQ itself that would suggest that conclusion.

 

[Knockernail]

Fortiesfun. I really like the way you explained it and the words you have used. You know i´m not english-speaker and it´s hard for me reading this kind of posts. But i´ve enjoyed it. I´d like to add my thoughts about it, but i don´t know english enough to do it, sorry.

Anyway, and if i understood the whole post (the first), i think that one subject is missing. The development of sexuality since primitive men´s reproduction. (Not sure if it´s said this way) I think it must explain too much about our sexual orientations. More than neurologic studies.

 

[fortiesfun]

Fortiesfun. I really like the way you explained it and the words you have used. You know i´m not english-speaker and it´s hard for me reading this kind of posts. But i´ve enjoyed it. I´d like to add my thoughts about it, but i don´t know english enough to do it, sorry.

Anyway, and if i understood the whole post (the first), i think that one subject is missing. The development of sexuality since primitive men´s reproduction. (Not sure if it´s said this way) I think it must explain too much about our sexual orientations. More than neurologic studies.

The evolution of sexuality is a really interesting topic, one that is not yet covered in this thread, and a good topic. Your English is fine. I'll get back to you on that one!

Thanks.

 

[Extremecummer]

I once had a psychologist tell a group of PFLAG (Parents and Friends of Gays and Lesbians) that the fastest way to gauge whether you are straight, gay or bi, is asking yourself the question: "What do I think about when I masturbate?" Dennis

 

[68306]

I once had a psychologist tell a group of PFLAG (Parents and Friends of Gays and Lesbians) that the fastest way to gauge whether you are straight, gay or bi, is asking yourself the question: "What do I think about when I masturbate?" Dennis

Philosophy? :wank:

 

[xxncxx]

I'm not sure if anyone has mentioned this sort of thing before, but I've always wondered whether the mother's desire for a female/male baby has any impact on sexual orientation - that a mother's desire for a certain sex while pregnant clashes with the genetics of what the baby will really be, and can cause a difference in sexual preference later in the baby's life. I know it's probably a weird idea, but there's a lot of mind-over-matter proof around.

 

[Pattypablo308]

I major in European History and minor in Sociology, so I have seen a trend that may be of some relivence here...

Somebody mentioned why the USA seems to be leading the trend and why we seem to have the most gay men.

I would argue that the "Western" and Anglophonic nations have tradionally lead the way when accepting new ideas. Historically radical ideas, such as Protestentism and the Industrial Revolution have been quicker to develop in the "West". (By the west I refer to the Northern and Westerly states of Europe.) The US, Canada, and Australia also fit that mold as well.

My other observation is that it would seem that whatever the process that makes gays gay, it would happen in equal ratio all over the world. I imagine that gays in the US are just more visable, if not vocal about themselves. Just like how there were likely just as many 500 years ago as there is now.

 

[submit452]

Homosexuality is accepted now. It's BISEXUALITY that's right now unacceptable and that's as bad as homophobia.

 

[Corius]

Since I don't ever identify myself as anything but sexual, and since I believe that all sex is intensely personal and ought to be private as well, and since others would know nothing of my desires, I have allowed myself to describe myself to suit my own tastes and inclinations. I have never "come out" and let others think what they will.

However, for the purpose of saying something about myself at this site I actually chose to say I was 70% straight and 30% gay; I know I can encourage and maintain with a high level of satisfaction long-term relationships with either a man or a woman. I believe in sexual bonding, but I freely admit though I have been married for many years, that I still on many occasions long for the embrace of a man and that doesn't ever go away. I do not cheat; I have wanted and have had only monogamous relationships.

I thank the writer of the helpful explanation and will direct a few folks I know to study it.

 

[fortiesfun]

I thank the writer of the helpful explanation and will direct a few folks I know to study it.

Thanks. You are very kind, and eloquent also.

 

[nudeyorker]

If you have any paralegal experience... you've got job secutity with me baby!