I prefer ground coffee/tea leaves to instant/bags too. If I do have to drink instant, it has to be Jacobs Krönung! I like my coffee dark and strong with only a smidgen of cold milk.
Instant: coffee first then sugar to keep the coffee granules from burning and ensure proper dissolving of sugar, lastly milk.
Ground: the brew first in a warmed-up cup, then same as with instant.
Tea leaves/bags: milk first in a warmed-up cup, then the brew, sugar last (traditional way, it just tastes better)
Bags (at work): same procedure as above except I leave the bag in when it's just for me.
But, I believe that no matter your procedure, if it's made with love and not begrudgingly, it will always taste good!