These Damn' Homos!

[D_Roland_D_Hay]

I don't think the thread is an "American" thing...

 

[iain_ware]

I just read why this was put on here, and the point I think is 'if gay guys like me can go out and do the things listed' why can't straight guys! well straight or gay doesn't matter to me it is 2 words, we are all human lets each of us do what we want to do and have fun together doing it, you show me how to cheer on a soccer team or have a laugh with the boys at something you find funny and I will show you how to get in touch with your gentle side! and feel your emotions and impress your women! Deal or no Deal??

 

[ActionBuddy]

Who are they to garden, fix the car, paint the fence, take the nieces and nephews fishing, get a tan, read the paper every day

Gawd, I'm a loser... I've never taken my niece or nephew fishing!

I'll have to change my percentages here again...

 

[Freddie53]

Why Do All These Homosexuals Keep Sucking My Cock?!?!




I've tried all sorts of things, but it's all been to no avail. A few months back, I started wearing an intimidating-looking black leather thong with menacing metal studs in the hopes that it would frighten those faggots off, but it didn't work. In fact, it only seemed to encourage them. Then, I really started getting rough, slapping them around whenever they were sucking my cock, but that failed, too. Even pulling out of their mouths just before ejaculation and shooting sperm all over their face, chest, and hair seemed to have no effect. What do I have to do to get the message across to these swishes?


I swear, if these homosexuals don't take a hint and quit sucking my cock all the time, I'm going to have to resort to drastic measures—like maybe pinning them down to the cement floor of the loading dock with my powerful forearms and working my cock all the way up their butt so they understand loud and clear just how much I disapprove of their unwelcome advances. I mean, you can't get much more direct than that.

This Onion article never gets old. Heh.

Lex,

OK. I admit I am guilty.:smile: I have consulted with my doctor. He recommends that you administer your "special" treatment at least once a day for my condition.

When can we begin?

*I may need this treatment for a lifetime. I hope Lex is "UP" for it. Gee, I may need TWO treatments some days.*

 

[chrisj428]

#1 -- To quote from one of my favorite "Bloom County" strips -- "I'm offended by your offensensitivity." Everyone lighten the fuck up already.

#2 -- Back on topic: I'd also like to volunteer for ExWhySee's experimentation. I'm house-trained and have had all my shots!

 

[Freddie53]

About This Thread:

When I saw the title and read the first OP, I immediately knew I needed to follow up and see just where it was headed. I was so pleased at first.

This is a spoof on the homosexual issue. I recognized that from the beginning. But....YOU HAVE TO START AT THE BEGINNING TO SEE THIS!!!

Starting in the middle with only reading one post it is not apparent that this is a humorous thread.

People, let's get back to the humor as was intended by the OP. If any of you want to seriously discuss the pros and cons of straight vs. gay lifestyles etc., there are plenty of threads here or start your own thread.

Let's not take someone else's thread to have a debate on the issue. Let's have a good time seeing who can best the other in a writing a spoof or humorous post.

Let this thread be just fun as the OP intended.

I have to go. I am expecting a call from Lex any minute. The candles are already in place and the music selections have been made and oh yes, I have plenty of lube in the drawer.

I can hardly wait.:biggrin1::tongue:

 

[8060]

I was sitting in one my law classes several years ago listening to my professor explain the origins of laws in a way that was fascinating and intoxicating. He used language and talked about the law like it had a life of its own. Everyone in the class was on the edge of their seats—waiting for Ken’s next brilliant words to come out of his mouth. At lunch, we all sat around and talked about the genius that Ken puts in front of us in every class and wished that we could have all of our classes taught by him. One of my classmates noticed Ken in the cafeteria sitting with a couple just chatting, enjoying their meals when Ken leaned over all of a sudden & kissed the man in the couple in the mouth…for a long time and with a lot of tongue.

I couldn’t believe that we were being taught “gay law.” Ken was so smart and knew exactly what to say to get our attention. He’s one of the greatest teachers I’ve ever known. I started lookin’ around more and noticed that every man in the room was kissing another man. Every woman was groping all over some chick. The gays are EVERYWHERE, even in academia. What am I supposed to do now? Homeschool my kids and myself to shield them from the “gay”? I fold. I have openly accepted the gay brain cell. It actually functions and serves a purpose.

 

[8060]

P. S. I am NOT a sheep:biggrin1:

 

[EagleCowboy]

I have to go. I am expecting a call from Lex any minute. The candles are already in place and the music selections have been made and oh yes, I have plenty of lube in the drawer.

I can hardly wait.:biggrin1::tongue:

And you call yourself gay!! I cannot BELIEVE that you didn't select the proper lighting or set out the Louis Vitton hand towels with the mints on top!! One cannot achieve utter, utter fabulousness without paying attention to *ALL* the details!!
We are going to revoke your gay card!! :biggrin1:

 

[invisibleman]

These damn' queers! Who do they think they are? Where do they get off subjecting the rest of us to their sick lifestyle? The nerve of some of them! How dare they get up early in the morning to maintain a fit, healthy body, work hard, pay taxes, donate to charity, go to church and synagogue, love people, lose people, dream, eat, sleep, shit, pick up sexy singles with their friends, or go home and snuggle with someone they love? Who are they to garden, fix the car, paint the fence, take the nieces and nephews fishing, get a tan, read the paper every day or laugh at sitcoms. What is that about? Do you want to be subjected to people who live like that?

"You are just like Britney...you want more, MORE, MORE!!!!!!!!! (sobs). You BAS-TARD!!! (a drop of snot drips outta my nose.)"



http://www.lpsg.org/attachments/22938d1203437578-spoiled-brat-how-i-feel..jpg

 

[B_Think_Kink]

Sure, go ahead: use me and then trade me in like an old Chevy. Damn.

MMM fleshpile! ftw, gay men don't know how to have flesh piles! We must get thme straight hoomans to teach us yet another thing.. eh.

 

[Lex]

The spirit of the joke gets totally ruined when you have to explain the joke to everyone.

...

I have to go. I am expecting a call from Lex any minute. The candles are already in place and the music selections have been made and oh yes, I have plenty of lube in the drawer.

I can hardly wait.:biggrin1::tongue:

You sweet talker you-- you always knows just the thing to do!

I am on my way!

 

[B_Think_Kink]

I have to go. I am expecting a call from Lex any minute. The candles are already in place and the music selections have been made and oh yes, I have plenty of lube in the drawer.

I can hardly wait.:biggrin1::tongue:

OMG not talking about homosexual acts in a public place! Jeesus!