Things Men Think Are Funny

Discussion in 'Funny Stuff: Jokes, Quizzes, Games & Pics' started by Principessa, Jun 29, 2007.

  1. Principessa

    Gold Member

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    I knew it was going to happen, but we just didn't know when. Here it is! Men's answer to Maxine

    MAX: Men strike back!

    Q: How many men does it take to open a beer?
    A: None. It should be opened when she brings it.
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    Q: Why is a Laundromat a really bad place to pick up a woman?
    A: Because a woman who can't even afford a washing machine will probably never be able to support you.
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    Q: Why do women have smaller feet than men?
    A: It's one of those "evolutionary things" that allows
    Them to stand closer to the kitchen sink.
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    Q: How do you know when a woman is about to say something smart?
    A: When she starts a sentence with "A man once told me..."
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    Q: How do you fix a woman's watch?
    A: You don't. There is a clock on the oven.
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    Q: Why do men pass gas more than women?
    A: Because women can't shut up long enough to
    Build up the required pressure.
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    Q: If your dog is barking at the back door and your wife is yelling at the front door, who do you let in first?
    A: The dog, of course. He'll shut up once you let him in.
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    Scientists have discovered a food that diminishes a woman's sex drive by 90%.
    It's called a Wedding Cake.
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    Q: Why do men die before their wives?
    A: They want to.
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    Women will never be equal to men until they can walk down the street with a bald head and a beer gut, and still think they are sexy.
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    In the beginning, God created the earth and rested.
    Then God created Man and rested.
    Then God created Woman.
    Since then, neither God nor Man has rested.
     
  2. wispandex_bulge

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    As a gay man, i still like maxine better ;)

    Seriously, I have a collection of about 200 of her cards and othe rmemorabilia...
     
  3. earllogjam

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    LOL.

    Thanks for the chuckles njtq466!
     
  4. B_ironsoul

    B_ironsoul New Member

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    even though technically women aren't supposed to like this stuff and be offended or whatever, I looooove these jokes. They are so fucking funny to me. I'm such a naughty little feminist
     
  5. B_josiah852

    B_josiah852 New Member

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    I love these jokes, just like I love the jokes about men that the ladies send around. Gotta have a sense of humor.
     
  6. Kassokilleri2ff

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    Q: If your dog is barking at the back door and your wife is yelling at the front door, who do you let in first?
    A: The dog, of course. He'll shut up once you let him in.


    haha, if the others are not true, this one definatly is ahahaha.
     
  7. seterwind

    seterwind New Member

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    Love it!
     
  8. biguy2738

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    Thanks you QT pie, loved all of them! Thank you going to so much trouble for our benefit - it is greatly appreciated.
     
  9. Principessa

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    Making others smile is never trouble or a bother. :smile:
     
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