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Discussion in 'Funny Stuff: Jokes, Quizzes, Games & Pics' started by Bariton, Jan 17, 2009.
You can't have enough nipples on television:
YouTube - Lily Allen and her Famous Third Nipple
That was rather anti-climatic.
The very start of living a happy life with your Triple-Nipple is knowing the facts. Understanding where you stand next to your fellow man will help you make the informed decisions you need to get the most from the hand that life deals you. The following facts were gathered through a series of surveys conducted on large samples of the population. Take heed!
1-2% of North Americans have a Triple-Nipple
72% of Triple-Nipples are on the breast area near a normal nipple
0.3% lie on the forehead like a giant pimple
62% of Triple-Nipplers have low self-confidence
...but, 81% are ugly and lack social skills, so it's no surprise
33% of Triple-Nipplers have their third nipple surgically removed during childhood. Afterwards, they frantically run around school asking people to sign their "nipple cast"
4% try to remove their Triple-Nipple on their own
Of these, 75% fail because they use a butter knife or a dull rock
40% are pleged as nipple donors
Triple-Nipples in Society:
11% of people surveyed said they would "be uncomfortable" around someone with a Triple-Nipple
3% know someone with a third nipple
Of those, 98% have made fun of that person to impress a girl... it didn't work
9% of employers admitted to discriminating practices against Triple-Nipplers
Tripple-Nipples and Women:
68% of girls surveyed said they would date a Triple-Nippler
17% said they would find a Triple-Nippler especially appealing
1% said they actively seek Triple-Nipplers
53% said they would break up a with a boyfriend if they found out he lied about his Triple-Nipple
By contrast, only 42% would break up on the condition that he routinely beat her