This is Silly, But.........

Discussion in 'Et Cetera, Et Cetera' started by Imported, Jun 11, 2003.

  1. Imported

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    Finedessert: Lets have a little fun with it.

    If Martha Stewarts Lawyers are not able to cut a deal, and she ends up doing time in Jail, Do you think she will be able to redo her cell.

    Something like changing those drab grey walls to a cool Key Lime Green.

    Martha Stewart sheets on the bed.

    Etc. Etc. Etc.

    What's Your opinion, and what changes would you have her make?

    Grandpa
     
  2. Pecker

    Pecker Retired Moderator
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    She could show us 99 things to do with a bare ceiling bulb.

    That would be a good thing.

    Pecker
     
  3. Pecker

    Pecker Retired Moderator
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    Or perhaps she could do a show on decorating shower thongs on a budget.

    Or maybe how to accessorize the basic orange jumpsuit.

    Pecker
     
  4. Imported

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    rayv1: Let's be real. Martha would have a camera crew in her cell the next day showing you how to make cookies from jail grule and how to redo a jail cell using toilet water and dirt. And she would have that shit looking tight.
     
  5. Pecker

    Pecker Retired Moderator
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    "Hey, what's that horrible screaming in Cell Block A?"

    "Oh, that's just Inmate Martha Stewart. She made a complete serving of silverware from gum wrappers and the guards are tossing her cell looking for the knives."

    Pecker
     
  6. Imported

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    Big_Swinging_Dick: I hate that Kunt!
     
  7. johnstone1985

    johnstone1985 New Member

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    Who is Martha Stewart, and what has she done?
     
  8. D_Martin van Burden

    D_Martin van Burden Account Disabled

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    Martha Stewart has become one of the most prestigious and well-admired moguls for women's domesticity in the past few years. Until recently, she has become the CEO of her own domestic line for household furnishings, linens, and draperies. All the while, she has been balancing responsibilities in the kitchen, marketing and merchandising her famous recipes. She has spread across the television and print media and has been largely successful.

    Over the past year, Martha Stewart has been under investigation for insider trading, a punishable offense characterized by fraudulent transmission of "inside knowledge" about stocks. Stewart invested in a health technology corporation and allegedly pulled out her investment at the last minute just before the stock plummeted in the market. The federal government finds such activity strangely suspect, so they came a-knockin' on Stewart's door and served her with a warrant.

    She has since stepped down from CEO duty of her own company and has become involved in this legal battle ever since.
     
  9. Imported

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    Finedessert: Press Release:

    In an effort to reduce valuable time lost by employees making repeated trips to the restroom, Wal*Mart has introduced their new office chair which will be placed in every office at the Home Office in Bentonville, Arkansas. These new chairs are expected to save the company over $2.5 million dollars per year in lost time. Georgia-Pacific's Paper Division has donated 500 cases of Northern Quilted Toilet Paper to get the ball rolling. Wal*Mart's C.E.O. is quoted as follows on this money saving effort: "No job is done until the paperwork is complete." Martha Stewart, formerly of K-Mart, will be supplying knitted toilet paper roll covers in 5 decorator colors in exchange for Wal*Mart Legal Dept. counsel. Stewart says, "Well, I have to have something to do between indictments...!"

    Grandpa
     
  10. Pecker

    Pecker Retired Moderator
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    Peeee Yeeeww!

    Don't pull Martha's finger! Prison food gives you gas.

    Pecker
     
  11. Imported

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    7x6andchg: Johnstone-

    Truth be told - you should have been glad you hadn't heard of her...."it's a good thing"

    7x6&C
     
  12. Imported

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    banana_boy33: Well, maybe they'll make a

    Martha Stewart Prison Days Collection

    i can see it now , she'll say something lame like

    "These blan white sheets can be brightened up by weeds and teeth you find in the yard, for added light burn toilet paper but don't forget ot throw it at the gaurds when you're finished, and these fashionable orange jumpsuits will make you look extra special on trash patrol"
     
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