Three person relationship (MFF). Can it work?

Discussion in 'Relationships, Discrimination, and Jealousy' started by Machete69, Nov 19, 2011.

  1. Machete69

    Machete69 New Member

    Joined:
    Dec 16, 2009
    Messages:
    23
    Likes Received:
    0
    Gender:
    Male
    My gf is bi and she's in a loving with another bisexual girl for over a year now. I was always ok with their relationship. They both treat me wonderfully and it does not affect my relationship with my gf. It's very loving, passionate, lots of sex and romance etc. Her gf adds a lot to it (for the better).

    Aside from the frequent fights they have, they both display extreme passion for each other.

    Anyway, overtime I find myself falling for my gf's gf (weird to say I know).

    We often have talks about the 3 of doing things together, almost like we're all equal partners in this relationship. My gf certainly does not mind if me and her are together. She recently admitted she wanted us to hook up and that it would make her happy.

    Also at the same time, I find my self loving both of them in very similar romantic ways.

    This is exactly what my gf wants. She want's her to live with us when we're married and even wants me and her to have a baby.

    Honestly, it seems almost too perfect and the dynamics and personality clashes actually mesh very well (almost too well).

    Both women are extremely attractive and both treat me like their bf when out in public.

    Honestly, it seems too perfect for all of us involved.

    So........is this realistic? Is this sustainable?

    Anyone have first hand experience with this?
     
  2. B_bi_mmf

    B_bi_mmf New Member

    Joined:
    Mar 28, 2008
    Messages:
    3,059
    Likes Received:
    20
    Gender:
    Male
    Location:
    U.S.
    Yes, I think that it is possible for people to get beyond jealousy and really support multiple relationships. I have only had an mmf household, but many of the issues carry over, I would think.

    If you are going to live together as a threesome, will there be three-way sex or just the individual pairings? I ask because if there is not a sexual three-way, then it is easier for feelings of being left out to develop. I'm not saying to outlaw 2-person sex, but if there is strong ongoing threesome sex, then I think the household situation works better.
     
  3. Countryguy63

    Verified Gold Member

    Joined:
    Jun 29, 2006
    Messages:
    14,488
    Albums:
    1
    Likes Received:
    1,447
    Gender:
    Male
    Location:
    near Monterey, Calif.
    Verified:
    Photo
    Anything is possible, but triads can be very tricky and difficult to successfully maintain. Brining children into complicates it further.

    You say that they fight (argue, whatever) frequently, unfortunately there is a high probability that one will decide to break up, and then where are you?

    Think long and hard, Good Luck, and Have Fun with what you have :biggrin1:
     
    #3 Countryguy63, Nov 19, 2011
    Last edited: Nov 19, 2011
  4. TopDudeFtl

    Verified Gold Member

    Joined:
    Sep 9, 2004
    Messages:
    1,365
    Albums:
    3
    Likes Received:
    155
    Gender:
    Male
    Location:
    Fort Lauderdale, FL
    Verified:
    Photo
    You're a very lucky man to be in the position to be in. However, you must step very carefully. If the girls are always fighting, that is not a good thing. A triad can work but all three must not be jealous in any way. I would suggest that you three sit down to thoroughly discuss the situation & all of the various aspects of the triad to make sure everyone is on the same page. Communication is key here. Let us know how it all works out. Good luck. :wink:
     
  5. Machete69

    Machete69 New Member

    Joined:
    Dec 16, 2009
    Messages:
    23
    Likes Received:
    0
    Gender:
    Male
    The fighting is 99% due to how they communicate. My gf is direct and open, while she retreats and "hibernates" alone.

    My gf is a very alpha female (more than most guys), dominant (opposite in bed), direct, also jealous and possessive at times. Also, very romantic, loving, spiritual and deep.

    She has the opposite personality, she's docile, submissive (opposite in bed), very kind sweet, emphatic with people, also very artistic and deep.

    They have the perfect opposites attract relationship.

    And i fit directly in the middle.
     
  6. Machete69

    Machete69 New Member

    Joined:
    Dec 16, 2009
    Messages:
    23
    Likes Received:
    0
    Gender:
    Male
    No jealousy at all, even from the start.

    Also, bi_mmf the sex at the moment has almost exclusively been pairings.

    I have never had sex with her gf. Although they have been a handful of times we've been sexual with each other.

    Although, i feel this will naturally turn into inevitable threesomes, but long term, i see pairings being the most common.
     
  7. FlyingHellfish

    Verified Gold Member

    Joined:
    Jul 22, 2011
    Messages:
    50
    Albums:
    2
    Likes Received:
    7
    Gender:
    Male
    Location:
    UK
    Verified:
    Photo
    You are a lucky man. A lucky, lucky man.
     
  8. Unnamed

    Unnamed Member

    Joined:
    Sep 17, 2011
    Messages:
    443
    Albums:
    2
    Likes Received:
    13
    Gender:
    Male
    you lucky bastard.
     
  9. D_Terry_Tugnuts

    D_Terry_Tugnuts Account Disabled

    Joined:
    Sep 15, 2011
    Messages:
    386
    Likes Received:
    7
    My wife is bi and for a few years before we met she lived with another woman partner. She has a girlfriend she's known for a while and occasionally spends a weekend with her; this year they had a week's holiday in Venice together. I know her girlfriend socially and really fancy her, a petite redhead, but sadly she is not interested in men! I have absolutely no problem with my wife's relationship with another woman. I imagine it might be less easy if we were in a true triad, as described above.

    We started swinging together not long after we'd first met, and while we mostly play in MFMF 4somes we do the odd MFF. I leave the women to play together then join them in bed later. It seems to work well, although the females we play with are not close friends, just swinging partners.
     
  10. TheRob

    Gold Member

    Joined:
    Aug 23, 2007
    Messages:
    5,009
    Albums:
    2
    Likes Received:
    639
    no body can tell you if it's realistic until it's been done by the people involved
     
  11. B_chinagirl4u2

    B_chinagirl4u2 New Member

    Joined:
    Nov 1, 2011
    Messages:
    568
    Likes Received:
    8
    Gender:
    Female
    Location:
    Hainan
    I know a poly family, they have been together for 7 years and doing great, at least from what I can see.
     
  12. lysander815

    lysander815 Member

    Joined:
    Mar 8, 2008
    Messages:
    93
    Likes Received:
    1
    Gender:
    Male
    I was in a relationship like this for about a year. It worked pretty well, and we split up for reasons that had nothing to do with the arrangement. All three of us were into each other, and although we weren't equal partners, we got along well because everyone was honest and we all knew where we stood. So it's definitely possible, but you need to have three people who are 100% game for it or it'll fall apart.
     
  13. vanessa_c

    vanessa_c Member

    Joined:
    Sep 2, 2008
    Messages:
    52
    Likes Received:
    4
    This is actually very interesting.

    I would love to have this sort of relationship. As a bisexual female, I think it's very healthy for all inloved.

    IMO the advantages for you are:
    1. You now have two hot women!
    2. You don't need to deal with clingyness or any sort of stifling as they will both want to spend time together away from u, giving you space without guilt.
    3. Financially if everyone is working that money pool amongst the 3 of you is greater.

    For the women the advantages are:
    1. They both get to have pussy & cock. If they're fully bi females like myself, believe me, you do can't go long without either.
    2. They can go out with you as a couple or trio and not face discrimination for being lesbians as either of them can pretend they're with you.
    3. Having as guy around the house is always useful, not just for cock ;)

    I fully believe a relationship as you described is very healthy and possibly stands a higher chance of success than typical couples.

    Bringing a baby into this relationship can be both good and bad. I have no doubt whatever so ever that a child will grow up perfectly fine and feel very loved in a home with two mommies.

    Although it would be a tad confusing if you get both of them pregnant and have to explain to your children why they have different grandparents and inlaws etc.
     
  14. D_Richard Lugie

    D_Richard Lugie Account Disabled

    Joined:
    Apr 25, 2011
    Messages:
    122
    Likes Received:
    1
    In something like this it is impossible for there to be equal communication and love between all partners. However according to the other posts it seems as if its possible. How will you make this work in the future though? That is my only question, good luck though.
    (background in sociology btw)
     
  15. nineinchking

    nineinchking Member

    Joined:
    May 7, 2010
    Messages:
    19
    Albums:
    2
    Likes Received:
    62
    Man on one hand I say you are a lucky man and how wonderful it must be to have all that support and love around you. On the other hand I think, this poor guy, he's got to put up with twice the bullshit. Either way bro, I wish you the best of luck with everything and really hope you three stay together.
     
  16. helgaleena

    Gold Member

    Joined:
    Sep 8, 2006
    Messages:
    5,663
    Albums:
    2
    Likes Received:
    3
    Gender:
    Female
    Location:
    Wisconsin USA
    I have heard of people making a 3-way into a way of life and raising the children resulting without problems, but only at third hand.

    In my own case, I am in a 'relationship' with two other men, but we all have children from previous relationships and do not try to live together or confuse each other's children with extra moms and dads. In fact we are only civil to each other's children and keep our love life out of the children's lives as much as possible. Grown ups do all sorts of things that don't need to be the children's business.
     
Draft saved Draft deleted