Threesome/foursome boundaries/how to

Handsomeishgay

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Hello!

my partner and I are very interested in doing a threesome/foursome. We are getting to a point where we’re very comfortable with each other and trusting and we feel ready to extend our relationship solidly with other people.

Our only things before we go forward are as follows:
-We aren’t sure about doing anything with anyone who is from our area

-we are debating if it should be with another couple and we all play/swap or one person to either tag team my bf with or take control over both of us we aren’t sure if one is more awkward than the other

-we haven’t done it before, so we aren’t sure what sort of rules or things we need to talk about prior in particular.

-we know one guy who we could have a threesome with, but we aren’t sure if we want a stranger(s)



so our questions are:
-should we find someone from our area that we know or should it be a stranger from here or elsewhere? And how would we find them? Aha we don’t have clubs that are open or anything, so I suppose grindr


-what important boundaries discussions would you recommend we have prior?

-would you recommend a threesome or a foursome? We can’t seem to find something that sways us one way or the other.

And I’d love to hear about your stories if you’re willing to tell me! ☺️
 

theplayerking

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If it’s your first time I suggest finding one stranger. Couples or friends will only add unnecessary complexity. I also suggest being very upfront and explicit with what you‘re looking for. You should also try it a few times with a few different guys before deciding whether you like threeways or not. Relax and have fun!
 
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deleted645178

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Hello!

my partner and I are very interested in doing a threesome/foursome. We are getting to a point where we’re very comfortable with each other and trusting and we feel ready to extend our relationship solidly with other people.

Our only things before we go forward are as follows:
-We aren’t sure about doing anything with anyone who is from our area

-we are debating if it should be with another couple and we all play/swap or one person to either tag team my bf with or take control over both of us we aren’t sure if one is more awkward than the other

-we haven’t done it before, so we aren’t sure what sort of rules or things we need to talk about prior in particular.

-we know one guy who we could have a threesome with, but we aren’t sure if we want a stranger(s)



so our questions are:
-should we find someone from our area that we know or should it be a stranger from here or elsewhere? And how would we find them? Aha we don’t have clubs that are open or anything, so I suppose grindr


-what important boundaries discussions would you recommend we have prior?

-would you recommend a threesome or a foursome? We can’t seem to find something that sways us one way or the other.

And I’d love to hear about your stories if you’re willing to tell me! ☺️
Do u not have a sauna close by or in the area, that way you can both try and play with others, see if it's the right thing gor you both.
Good luck :)
 

cedarizzo

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My ex and I often had 3(or more) ways both before and while we dated. We often chatted about things we were wanting (or not wanting) with these encounters.

One big thing we talked about was the other guy. My ex and I both had very different tastes in men. So finding a guy that we both agreed upon was a challenge sometimes. But did learn to compromise. If one of us didn't find the other guy sexually appealing, he had the option of either joining in and trying to make the best of it, or watching it happen. We always tried to be fair, if one guy picked the guy, the other would pick next time. And if one of us totally objected, then we both agreed that it wasn't going to happen. We were very fair and had lots of fun.

Another biggie is what will happen during a 3way. Are you allowed to kiss the other guy? Are either one (or both) of you going to fuck the other guy? Is the other guy allowed to fuck either one (or both) of you? What are the limits of what can happen?

If one of you suddenly wants to back out or stop completely, do both of you agree to stop or is the other one going to continue by himself?

Always communicate with each other! Talk about what you like or don't like. And try to realize if you partner is getting jealous or uncomfortable. It is better to call it off than continue.
 

Handsomeishgay

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Thank you! I am definitely the one leaning towards a stranger.
We don’t have anything like that here, the closest thing is a nude beach and it’s not just for gays so it’s not like we can just ask there aha.
And thank you! Those are definitely important things to bring up.

I think we’ve talked a little about who we want, I wouldn’t mind someone kinda dominating to dominate us both. I’m usually a dom top, especially in our relationship but it’s fun to switch it up. But I also wouldn’t mind someone like me who was kinda vers so I could fuck both of them, and me and the new guy could both fuck my guy - which I think is kinda his dream aha. The more cock in him the better I think. Thanks though!!

have any of you ever dp’d with anyone? Were they strangers?
 
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thongboy

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Thank you! I am definitely the one leaning towards a stranger.
We don’t have anything like that here, the closest thing is a nude beach and it’s not just for gays so it’s not like we can just ask there aha.
And thank you! Those are definitely important things to bring up.

I think we’ve talked a little about who we want, I wouldn’t mind someone kinda dominating to dominate us both. I’m usually a dom top, especially in our relationship but it’s fun to switch it up. But I also wouldn’t mind someone like me who was kinda vers so I could fuck both of them, and me and the new guy could both fuck my guy - which I think is kinda his dream aha. The more cock in him the better I think. Thanks though!!

have any of you ever dp’d with anyone? Were they strangers?
My gf and I have an MMF at least once a month, and DP is always part of a session that usually goes into a second day. Because we're both bi, we want the second guy to be bi too. It means a lot more fun and variety. Besides we don't want the other dude to suddenly freaks out over getting too close to my hard cock
 

Redwoodsack

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My gf and I have an MMF at least once a month, and DP is always part of a session that usually goes into a second day. Because we're both bi, we want the second guy to be bi too. It means a lot more fun and variety. Besides we don't want the other dude to suddenly freaks out over getting too close to my hard cock
Damn man you are living the dream!
 

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my partner and i years ago--talked it over with couple other guys befor we did anything---my partner didnt like to be fucked bt he loved to be rimmed-- so basically it was no one can fuck him anyone can fuck me anything else would be fine--so the threesome/foursome turned into a 5 -some when they told a friend of their that the bottom--which was me--loved to be fucked and lord did i ever get fu cked
 

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So Handsomeishgay - any update?

Love got know how you got on.

My experience of 3/4ways is they can be really fun. I had plenty with my ex over the course of 13 years, mainly because we were out clubbing amongst lots of hot guys and we were both quite young, flirty and horny as hell. You do have to be careful of one of the couple becoming left out, if the 3rd guy suddenly decides he only likes one of you when you get home.

I'd also advise a stranger, or try it on holiday, where the 3rd person is unlikely to be from your area.

My current partner and I haven't really felt the need for another person, it has come close a few times usually when we are out n about, but when we discuss it between ourselves, we said nah, and just went home and fucked.
 

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I have been into 3 ways since very young. I started out just liking to watch a guy and girl fuck. Then I started to join in. And now i have an understanding wife that also like 3 ways - with another guy. And I can get hard - and stay hard - watching him fuck her in all kinds of positions - with a dp my favorite. I get on my back and my wife rides me - then the guy enters her ass - and I can feel his cock going inside her - and what adds is her moans and sex talk. It's the best.
 
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Alex22876

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Hello!

my partner and I are very interested in doing a threesome/foursome. We are getting to a point where we’re very comfortable with each other and trusting and we feel ready to extend our relationship solidly with other people.

Our only things before we go forward are as follows:
-We aren’t sure about doing anything with anyone who is from our area

-we are debating if it should be with another couple and we all play/swap or one person to either tag team my bf with or take control over both of us we aren’t sure if one is more awkward than the other

-we haven’t done it before, so we aren’t sure what sort of rules or things we need to talk about prior in particular.

-we know one guy who we could have a threesome with, but we aren’t sure if we want a stranger(s)



so our questions are:
-should we find someone from our area that we know or should it be a stranger from here or elsewhere? And how would we find them? Aha we don’t have clubs that are open or anything, so I suppose grindr


-what important boundaries discussions would you recommend we have prior?

-would you recommend a threesome or a foursome? We can’t seem to find something that sways us one way or the other.

And I’d love to hear about your stories if you’re willing to tell me! ☺️
Stranger

go for an overnight trip someplace, like an hour plus away.

I would also recommend setting the expectation that there are no independent communications (neither of you talks with the other without the sig other knowing), particularly important after.

be aware of someone not feeling involved. It can lead to feelings of exclusion. It can also be a kink, which means always keep the other involved even if they are physically involved - talking, holding hands, etc.