To Men- Grinding is NOT Dancing

[B_Jennuine73]

Why do men think grinding on a woman on the dance floor is dancing? Do they even think it is? I hear "Oh yeah, I can dance," then watch as he gets on the dance floor and grinds the nearest female ass.

It is really annoying when a guy will come up and start to grind his cock against my ass with no hello, no smile, no flirtation, no ACTUAL DANCING. Most of the time, you can't see them coming. Next thing you know there's a cock against my ass and I didn't even see the guy's face!

Yes, it is flattering, kind of, but mostly it's a sure way for the guy to be labeled a pig. I would much rather see a guy who does not have the beat up dancing, actually attempting to dance, then just come up and grind on me.

I know I am not the only lady here that feels that way. So I want to hear from the ladies. And men...you can rip up one side of me and down the other if you care to...

 

[ManlyBanisters]

That happened to me once - the guy landed somewhere between the bar and the dj box in a pile of (fortunately empty) crates.

We don't take that shit, chez-moi.

 

[marleyisalegend]

I'm a man and I'm with you, most guys have NO rhythm and no other move than raising their hands in the air and gyrating their pelvis. On the same note, every other youtube vid I watch of girls in "dance classes" "dance routines" or "dancing in their living room", there's no other technique utilized except making her ass-cheeks bounce. It's done on both sides of the track. Most people nowadays don't know anything about dance other than grinding. Just like most music fans know every Britney Spears lyric but can't name one Frank Sinatra song. Culture has been lost on my generation in favor of raunchiness.

You should see dutty whine videos where girls are (literally) tossed and rolled around, and laid on the ground while guys jump off a ROOFTOP and land with their crotch grinding all over the girls face.

 

[D_Tam_Ponnit]

Jennuine73, unfortunately I have found women prefer me to dance that way rather than face to face.

 

[MASSIVEPKGO_CHUCK]

Why do men think grinding on a woman on the dance floor is dancing? Do they even think it is? I hear "Oh yeah, I can dance," then watch as he gets on the dance floor and grinds the nearest female ass.

It is really annoying when a guy will come up and start to grind his cock against my ass with no hello, no smile, no flirtation, no ACTUAL DANCING. Most of the time, you can't see them coming. Next thing you know there's a cock against my ass and I didn't even see the guy's face!

Yes, it is flattering, kind of, but mostly it's a sure way for the guy to be labeled a pig. I would much rather see a guy who does not have the beat up dancing, actually attempting to dance, then just come up and grind on me.

I know I am not the only lady here that feels that way. So I want to hear from the ladies. And men...you can rip up one side of me and down the other if you care to...

I don't make excuses for it, on the other hand I don't excuse it either- complete stranger grinding not only is arrogant but presumptuous. You'd be amazed how guys got the wrong impression and were buckled over after two minutes of trying to get out of it peacefully.

 

[B_Jennuine73]

Jennuine73, unfortunately I have found women prefer me to dance that way rather than face to face.

Wanna dance?

 

[MASSIVEPKGO_CHUCK]

Wanna dance?

Gee, Jenny, I knew you were interested in the ol' bump & grind, but I thought you were interested in the carnal kind....:naughty:

 

[B_VinylBoy]

Someone needs to post this thread at Hip-Hop parties all over New York City. LOL!!!

A lot of guys who can't dance always try to pass off bumping and grinding as dance moves. They only like "hardcore Rap" and they only jump around like fools waving their hands when they're dancing with their homies, or dry humping when they get one girl interested in them on the floor. I guess that comes from watching too much BET.

 

[marleyisalegend]

Someone needs to post this thread at Hip-Hop parties all over New York City. LOL!!!

A lot of guys who can't dance always try to pass off bumping and grinding as dance moves. They only like "hardcore Rap" and they only jump around like fools waving their hands when they're dancing with their homies, or dry humping when they get one girl interested in them on the floor. I guess that comes from watching too much BET.

You get the award for most generalizations in one post. I have many bump-and-grind friends who listen to Nirvana, instead of "only hardcore rap" which you often CAN'T grind to because there are violent themes and rugged beats that destroy the sensuality of slicker, rhythm-friendly club hip-hop. I've seen plenty of people who may not even listen to rap grinding to Britney Spears, or techno-rave music. After all of this, addressing the BET comment and colloqualisms you've stated seems pointless since it's already apparent you have a narrow-minded view of people who's hips gyrate.

 

[D_Thoraxis_Biggulp]

Oh so you don't want to feel my piece against your ass, huh? Alright, I see how it is.

 

[pronatalist]

No, grinding is dancing, although probably not so moral nor socially acceptable?​

Someone needs to post this thread at Hip-Hop parties all over New York City. LOL!!!

A lot of guys who can't dance always try to pass off bumping and grinding as dance moves. They only like "hardcore Rap" and they only jump around like fools waving their hands when they're dancing with their homies, or dry humping when they get one girl interested in them on the floor. I guess that comes from watching too much BET.

I disagree. Grinding IS dancing, as dancing and humans mating, have certain similarities. Perhaps that why some prudes in the past, tried to ban dancing?

However, obviously, grinding probably shouldn't be so socially acceptable. Parents criticized Elvis Presly for his gyrating hips, and it seems to have went downhill from there.

About the only dancing I was ever much good at, was Western Square Dancing, which doesn't include such close "grinding," but still involves some innocent touching and still could be mildly "erotic," technically.

My Dad said it's normal to ooze pre-cum when dancing with a lady, and presumably, that's even the most normal and safe dancing. I suppose even innocent hand-holding, can send "signals" to the body, to prepare for possible sex and procreation, as humans in an increasingly populous world, sexually arouse quite easily.

I also agree that people who can't dance, may perhaps be more inclined to grind. But upon near strangers, isn't that immoral and "promiscuous?"

BTW, I consider BET racist, and BET probably ought to be banned or boycotted, until we have a WET? Seems like an unjustified "double standard" to me. If we must have "Black Entertainment," why can't it be more moral and social mainstream or something, say like the Cosby Show?

 

[B_VinylBoy]

You get the award for most generalizations in one post. I have many bump-and-grind friends who listen to Nirvana, instead of "only hardcore rap" which you often CAN'T grind to because there are violent themes and rugged beats that destroy the sensuality of slicker, rhythm-friendly club hip-hop. I've seen plenty of people who may not even listen to rap grinding to Britney Spears, or techno-rave music. After all of this, addressing the BET comment and colloqualisms you've stated seems pointless since it's already apparent you have a narrow-minded view of people who's hips gyrate.

I can do more generalizations, ya know! :biggrin1:

But seriously, we can pigeonhole & trainspot every single genre from Ambient Trip Hop to Mongolian Folk and find a group of people who can't dance, or categorize bumping & grinding as their dance moves of choice. It wasn't my intention to just single out Hip-Hop and BET as the source for everything wrong in the evolution of dance, although they do play a lot of lousy music videos these days and I'm sure you'd agree with that (or else you wouldn't have been so vocal about how horrible Hip-Hop is in previous threads or started an entirely unique thread about being embarrassed by BET). My view on music isn't narrow minded in the least.

Don't make the mistake in reading too much in a comment that was merely meant to be a joke.

 

[Qua]

I can't dance and will freely admit it. I'll do the grinding thing, but I consider it a crutch to hide the fact that I can't dance. I believe my statement on it is "I can't dance for shit, so usually I attach a guitar or a girl to prevent myself from looking like a total fool."

BUT I must say in my defense, dancing ability has LITTLE to NOTHING to do with one's sense of rhythm. It only requires the most basic awareness of the existence of a beat. Most people I know who claim to have "rhythm" can't figure out what's going on in any song beyond a basic 3/4 or 4/4 pattern, much less actually have an awareness of a drummer's groove ahead or behind the beat. This is coming from a prog rock and jazz/fusion snob who is all about time signature changes, polyrhythms, syncopations and the like. Thus my music is "undanceable". Not true, people just lack the gumption or rhythmic awareness to groove to a 6/8 clave or anything involving odd times. The dancing ability = rhythm thing is one of my biggest pet peeves. I have an impeccable sense of rhythm. I can't dance to save my life.

EDIT: I should say...on a basic level. Professional dancers obviously must have a solid rhythmic sense

 

[D_percypenguin]

i have 2 left feet,

who wants to teach me to dance ? :tongue:

 

[B_Jennuine73]

I don't know who thinks a good way to meet a girl is to come up behind her without saying a word and rub his cock against her ass.

As you may know from previous posts, I am not a prude. It is not about being prudish. It is about "give me some space and stop grinding your dick against my ass".

If the guy was smoother...alright, play by play time. Sees a girl on the dance floor and smiles. She smiles back. Next song comes on and he stands next to her to dance. He says hi, she says hi back. He moves a little closer and compliments her or says something funny, having to get close to her ear because the music is so loud. She will let him know if she is interested and if she is, by the end of the night, she might let him grind against her, might even initiate the grinding.

/\ The world according to Jenn.

 

[marleyisalegend]

The dancing ability = rhythm thing is one of my biggest pet peeves. I have an impeccable sense of rhythm. I can't dance to save my life.

When I say "rhythm", I associate the word with a general understanding of timing and you have an in-depth knowledge of it so I may be using the word incorrectly but I'd say you do have rhythm. If not physically, in your understanding of timing concepts. Very few people who call themselves "dancers" understand beats within the beat, and do basic step-moves that fall in line with the most easily recognizable counts. 1,2,3,4,2,2,3,4,etc...

 

[B_New End]

I dont grind

..say hi? Next song? I have never been to a club that had any type of break between the songs.

but how are you supposed to talk to someone on the floor at a club?

the only girls I ever dance with are the ones I came with. I am scared of strangers.

 

[B_VinylBoy]

Very few people who call themselves "dancers" understand beats within the beat, and do basic step-moves that fall in line with the most easily recognizable counts. 1,2,3,4,2,2,3,4,etc...

But that's basically what dancing is in its simplest form. You listen to a piece of music, feel & find out the overall tempo and move to it making sure that the most emphasized portions of your moves are in sync with it. I usually tell people to practice simply walking on tempo with their favorite music on their iPods. The whole idea is to do whatever you like, as long as it's in tempo. Even bumping and grinding can be fun if done properly and on beat. Sadly, many people who can't even do the basics will instantly grab someone and start simulating bad touches on the dance floor.

Now, if we're talking about precise dance steps, such as the Waltz, the Twist, the Hokey-Pokey or even the Electric Slide (yeeks!), then these are things that should be attempted after you've learned the fundamentals. For even these things follow the basics, but add precise movements to them and limit what you can do in order to do it properly.

 

[cm70874]

Thanks Jennuine73 for starting this thread. I have danced ballet all my life. Although its the genere I am more experienced in I also dabble in hip-hop and jazz. I HATE going to straight clubs with my straight friends cause no one dances. Either guys are doing the two step in the corner looking for a girl to hump or either on the dance floor trying their best to penetrate. And girls aren't any better. If you want to dance like a stripper then go to a strip club......not a dance club. But its whatever.

And who do you talk to, to get a gay club to ease up on the techno/house music. Shit, has anyone heard of variety.

 

[Mr. Bungle]

Why do men think grinding on a woman on the dance floor is dancing? Do they even think it is? I hear "Oh yeah, I can dance," then watch as he gets on the dance floor and grinds the nearest female ass.

It is really annoying when a guy will come up and start to grind his cock against my ass with no hello, no smile, no flirtation, no ACTUAL DANCING. Most of the time, you can't see them coming. Next thing you know there's a cock against my ass and I didn't even see the guy's face!

Yes, it is flattering, kind of, but mostly it's a sure way for the guy to be labeled a pig. I would much rather see a guy who does not have the beat up dancing, actually attempting to dance, then just come up and grind on me.

I know I am not the only lady here that feels that way. So I want to hear from the ladies. And men...you can rip up one side of me and down the other if you care to...

those guys crack me up - and we've all seen that type too; the kind that strut on into the club, like they own the place... just reeking of TAG body spray - sizing everything up and choosing their next victim - for the club that they're inside can barely contain their overflowing sexual prowess...