To The Straight Guy At Party Last Night

Discussion in 'Relationships, Discrimination, and Jealousy' started by Countryguy63, Jun 21, 2010.

  1. Countryguy63

    Verified Gold Member

    Joined:
    Jun 29, 2006
    Messages:
    14,488
    Albums:
    1
    Likes Received:
    1,448
    Gender:
    Male
    Location:
    near Monterey, Calif.
    Verified:
    Photo
    Truth Wins Out - To the Straight Guy at the Party Last Night

    This is from the site above....

    To the Straight Guy at the Party Last Night
    Posted June 20th, 2010 by Michael Airhart
    A brilliant little article was posted on Craigslist in Lansing, Michigan, a couple days ago. Since then, several people have flagged it for removal — reasons unspecified.
    Until someone comes forward with a reason for its removal (such as copyright violation), I’m reposting the article here.

    A mutual friend of ours threw a big party for her 30th birthday, tons of people were there and it was a lot of fun. Somewhere along the line you and I ended up on the balcony for some fresh air at the same time. We started chatting; we talked about sports, books, tv – discovered we both are about to start our masters degrees and spent some time debating the pro’s and con’s of the educational system. We talked about hanging out sometime, and you wanted to meet my girlfriend.

    I understand how upsetting it was for you when I blinked mildly in surprise and said I was here with my husband. I know it was a shock to your system, if your face had turned any paler I might have called 911. You made a good recovery though – that hurried mutter of “I’m not like that” was very polite and you only knocked over two drinks and one vase in your hurry to rush to anywhere other than near me. I can’t blame you – I forgot how delicate you straight boys are. So I wanted to give you a few helpful hints about where you went wrong last night.

    1) As a general rule we don’t walk around with big signs around our neck proclaiming our sexuality. No scarlet letters, no scent of hellfire and brimstone… sorry about that.

    2) We do not generally assume that everyone within 5 feet of us must also be homosexual – it was nice of you to immediately reassure me that you are hetero, but it was really unnecessary.

    3) Homosexuality is not infectious. While I am sure you meant no disrespect with your hasty departure; in the future you can rest assured that taking a few extra seconds in your mad dash for safety will not result in you being turned gay. It will however keep you from destroying expensive vases and knocking over senior citizens.

    4) This next one may come as a surprise; but you are not, in fact, irresistible. The fact that you have a dick does not instantly turn me into a bundle of uncontrolled lust. Contrary to popular opinion, being in the same room with a straight man does not cause a gay man to instantly lose all common sense and basic common courtesy. Though I am not so sure about the reverse.

    5) Homosexuals in general get a little irked when people treat us like some sort of leper. Rushing to another mutual friend of ours and advising him of my sexuality, so he could be “forewarned” was really uncalled for.

    6) Upon being told (by said mutual friend) to stop being an idiot and that you were not my type anyway… it generally confuses the issue when you then proceed to become upset that I DON’T find you attractive. Three seconds ago you were running through a crowd of people with your hands cupped protectively over your junk as if I might attack you at any moment with a blowjob. See hint number 4.

    7) We homosexuals have an odd sense of humor – I can’t help that. Something about watching you freak out as if all the demons of hell were after you just struck me as vastly amusing.

    8) While being pissed at me for dissolving into uncontrollable laughter might be understandable… gathering a couple guys together to “teach the fag a lesson” is not.

    9) You might also want to drink a little less and be a little more careful about the guys you approach for your little proto-hate-mob.

    10) Assuming the two tall muscle-bound bruisers must be uber-hetero and just as appalled by my presence as you was your first mistake. It was an understandable one though. How were you to know that pflag tshirt the first guy was wearing wasn’t a sports team? Also the rainbow ring the second guy was wearing could have meant anything I am sure.

    11) In retrospect I suppose that upon hearing your not very subtle hate-talk and seeing who you were heading for; I could have said something instead of just laughing harder. I apologize for that. I should have just introduced you to my husband instead of letting you walk up to him and ask him if he wanted to help you teach “that fag over there” a lesson. I hope that broken nose heals up cleanly.
     
  2. Chastig

    Chastig New Member

    Joined:
    May 26, 2010
    Messages:
    56
    Likes Received:
    0
    Gender:
    Male
    Thank you for sharing... I had a few laughs, was a little sad to hear about the responce you were given. Sorry you had to experience this. I hope your husbands hand is okay, and that his nose heals quickly.
     
  3. maxcok

    Gold Member

    Joined:
    Nov 17, 2009
    Messages:
    7,392
    Likes Received:
    12
    Gender:
    Male
    Location:
    Elsewhere
    HI-larious! And a whole lotta truth in that.

    Thanks for bringing it to us, Countryguy.
     
  4. Countryguy63

    Verified Gold Member

    Joined:
    Jun 29, 2006
    Messages:
    14,488
    Albums:
    1
    Likes Received:
    1,448
    Gender:
    Male
    Location:
    near Monterey, Calif.
    Verified:
    Photo
    **disclaimer** This was not "my" story.

    I gave the link to the site that it was from. I put it here because of the discrimination, but I contemplated putting it in the "Jokes and Funnys" Forum
     
  5. HiddenLacey

    Gold Member

    Joined:
    Apr 28, 2010
    Messages:
    5,470
    Albums:
    1
    Likes Received:
    249
    Gender:
    Female
    Location:
    somewhere
    LOL 8 & 9 are the best :tongue: I have seen a reaction like that while out with some friends, when I explained that neither was my boyfriend, I was with them and they were boyfriends.

    Wait are you sure it's not catching because so many people live in FEAR that it is:rolleyes:
     
  6. flame boy

    flame boy Account Disabled

    Joined:
    Feb 4, 2008
    Messages:
    8,889
    Likes Received:
    5
    Love it. I'm passing this on to friends as we speak.
     
  7. maxcok

    Gold Member

    Joined:
    Nov 17, 2009
    Messages:
    7,392
    Likes Received:
    12
    Gender:
    Male
    Location:
    Elsewhere
    a) People don't read.

    b) No, you definitely put it in the right place. Homophobia can be funny, especially when it's internalized.

    THEY CAN'T HANDLE THE TRUTH!!! LOL.
     
  8. TomCat84

    Gold Member

    Joined:
    Nov 23, 2009
    Messages:
    3,497
    Albums:
    1
    Likes Received:
    32
    Gender:
    Male
    Location:
    San Diego, CA
    :arms::spank:
     
  9. coachreffn

    coachreffn Active Member

    Joined:
    Oct 30, 2009
    Messages:
    127
    Albums:
    1
    Likes Received:
    69
    Location:
    California
    While I don't support homophobia in the least, I did not find that this article had 'the ring of truth' to it. In a social gathering like the one described, a man who is working on a Master's degree and is as articulate and interesting is not the same type of man that would becoming brutish and go up to complete strangers to 'teach the fag a lesson'. I think it more likely to be a piece of fiction that is sort of a cautionary tale. There is a great more acceptance of homosexuals in a setting like the one described. I think it was being asked to be pulled due to its fictional nature rather than the content.
     
  10. maxcok

    Gold Member

    Joined:
    Nov 17, 2009
    Messages:
    7,392
    Likes Received:
    12
    Gender:
    Male
    Location:
    Elsewhere
    ^ :rolleyes:














    That's what I calls denial of denial.
     
  11. Countryguy63

    Verified Gold Member

    Joined:
    Jun 29, 2006
    Messages:
    14,488
    Albums:
    1
    Likes Received:
    1,448
    Gender:
    Male
    Location:
    near Monterey, Calif.
    Verified:
    Photo

    You took the non-words right outta my mouth :biggrin1:



    now, how bout puttin something back into it?? :naughty:
     
  12. nudeyorker

    Gold Member

    Joined:
    Nov 6, 2006
    Messages:
    42,918
    Likes Received:
    38
    Gender:
    Male
    Location:
    NYC/Honolulu
    Thanks for posting that. I'm passing that along too! I can't think of why it's had reports for removal. Oh well!
     
  13. Lex

    Lex
    Gold Member

    Joined:
    Jun 11, 2004
    Messages:
    9,536
    Likes Received:
    16
    Gender:
    Male
    Location:
    In Your Darkest Thoughts and Dreams
    Great find, CG!! Love it!
     
  14. D_Gunther Snotpole

    D_Gunther Snotpole Account Disabled

    Joined:
    Oct 3, 2005
    Messages:
    14,610
    Likes Received:
    5
    I agree.

    That's my guess. A cautionary tale ... and a hoot to read.

    Often but not necessarily.

    Could be.

    I found it suspect simply because the details were too perfect. Life isn't usually that well written ... at least in terms of details, if not of actual wordsmithery.

    Very funny though.
     
  15. _Edu

    Verified Gold Member

    Joined:
    Jan 26, 2010
    Messages:
    3,303
    Albums:
    4
    Likes Received:
    5,729
    Gender:
    Male
    Location:
    México
    Verified:
    Photo
    I think this point is what most guys should understand! haha ...
    I saw a "friendship" that broke up becasue his friend was gay and having the thoughts about that just beacause a dude is gay; he will instantly rape him.
    So, I think ppl should understand that a gay dude won't be attracted to EVERY dude he sees...
     
  16. petite

    petite New Member

    Joined:
    Mar 3, 2010
    Messages:
    7,539
    Albums:
    2
    Likes Received:
    34
    Gender:
    Female
    Wow! That was hilarious! Thank you for sharing it. I'm going to put it on my Facebook. :smile:
     
  17. alwaysguessing

    alwaysguessing New Member

    Joined:
    May 24, 2010
    Messages:
    661
    Likes Received:
    1
    Gender:
    Male
    Location:
    Northeast US
    That does not sound realistic.
     
  18. maxcok

    Gold Member

    Joined:
    Nov 17, 2009
    Messages:
    7,392
    Likes Received:
    12
    Gender:
    Male
    Location:
    Elsewhere
    Gosh Huck, just because someone is 'about to start a Master's degree' is no guarantee of social enlightenment. Hell, there are plenty of people with Master's, even PhD's who are horribly homophobic. Some of them even received their degrees at religiously conservative universities; some regularly testify in court cases as expert witnesses in gay rights cases. There are plenty of "uneducated" people who are not at all homophobic as well.

    Who knows what region of the country this occurred or who was at the party beyond the guests briefly described? Maybe this one guest was the odd man out. Of course the writer took poetic license to make the point and to make the account entertaining, but that does not negate the truth behind it at all, imho. I have been in exactly that sort of situation myself with presumably "educated" people on more than one occasion.

    a man after my own hard . . . er . . . heart.
     
    #18 maxcok, Jun 21, 2010
    Last edited: Jun 21, 2010
  19. Mr_Bulldog

    Verified Gold Member

    Joined:
    Jun 5, 2009
    Messages:
    1,106
    Albums:
    3
    Likes Received:
    318
    Gender:
    Male
    Location:
    Eglin AFB
    Verified:
    Photo
    I couldn't help but laugh over this. It is rather funny.
     
  20. D_Gunther Snotpole

    D_Gunther Snotpole Account Disabled

    Joined:
    Oct 3, 2005
    Messages:
    14,610
    Likes Received:
    5
    Couldn't agree more.

    Here is what coachreffn wrote:

    And my reply:
    And then you remark, quite unexceptionably:
    Think we're still pretty much on the same song page.
    We just have to decide when poetic license tips a story into a piece of fiction ... albeit one with 'truth' behind it.
    I suspect there is too much poetic license to say the story is factual.
    But that don't mean there ain't a whole lotta troot in it, max.
    I concur.
     
Draft saved Draft deleted