Token gay guy or legit ship

[nhguy78]

Hey guys,

I love when straight guys invite me or us out with them. I like to be included in general. I wonder though do straight guys look for gay guys as tokens or are they seen as legit wanting them around? I suppose this depends on the guy on both sides of the discussion i guess.

Lately, i sleep eat work and repeat. Let's go get ice cream or something.

 

[lvsg]

What

 

[ronin001]

You sound just like any other guy. Guys are pretty much just guys. Though, I would hate for someone to want to hang out with me just because I was African American. Trust me I seriously hate hanging out. But when I do stuff, as long as you are not a dick; or an A-hole you are welcome to be part of the group.

 

[Motion-of-the-Ocean]

Tokens? Life is not like a TV show where a group of friends have to have at least one gay guy (or a black guy if they are a cast of bougie white guys) to hang out with.

Most people I'm pretty sure choose who they want include in their circle or hang out with on several factors, but none that have to do with their orientation. While certain people might obviously choose to exclude gay men (or any other demographic) from their group due to their personal feelings and prejudices, I've never heard of them purposefully seeking them out as a token gesture.

While some women might selectively seek out gay men as friends (I'm not going to use the well-known pejorative term some call such females), as it makes them feel safe in not having to deal with unwanted or naturally forming sexual issues, I can't imagine what advantage it would serve for straight men, other than giving them perhaps a different perspective on some things. The fact, you have friends who are open minded and could care less about your orientation and see you as just another dude, I would think should be something to be cherished, not questioned.

But then again, what do I know? I don't really hang-out with other guys and can count on one hand the ones I considered true friends, but I do know I could care less about their sexuality. Them being gay would not stop me from wanting to spend "bro-time" with them, but neither would I purposefully seek them out just to include them as a "token".

 

[Sagittarius84]

Not "token" in a negative way, but there is something to be said for how straight men are percieved nowadays by the women around them and how men will integrate that new dynamic into the friendships and associations they have. There are both equally valid altruistic and selfish motivations to demonstrate one's friend group as one that encourages acceptance. So it's a combination of most likely OP is considered likeable and trusted amongst these straight men and so they accept him as part of the pack as it were, and it doesn't exactly hurt to purport oneself as a man not encumbered by homophobia and other such things when interacting with women they may be interested in.