Too Shy Being Naked With Others

oook

Loved Member
Joined
Sep 11, 2020
Posts
85
Media
0
Likes
582
Points
93
Location
Taipei, Taiwan
I'm pretty shy about being naked with my friends. I've been always like this since I was a kid and every time when I have to get changed in a locker or use the urinal with some people around, I feel quite nervous and uncomfortable and try to avoid being seen. It got slightly better when I went to high school and college as I slowly got used to being naked with a few close friends. But if other people are around, I still feel somewhat weird that they see my naked body. There's nothing wrong with my body but the thought that they can see my private part makes me feel somewhat embarrassed.

I know many guys are completely comfortable with nudity among friends and I sometimes hope I can be like them. Are there other people who feel the same? And how do you deal with these nudity situations?
 

yhtang

Superior Member
Joined
Apr 10, 2006
Posts
2,434
Media
32
Likes
3,153
Points
343
Location
Malaysia
Sexuality
No Response
Gender
Male
I'm pretty shy about being naked with my friends. I've been always like this since I was a kid and every time when I have to get changed in a locker or use the urinal with some people around, I feel quite nervous and uncomfortable and try to avoid being seen. It got slightly better when I went to high school and college as I slowly got used to being naked with a few close friends. But if other people are around, I still feel somewhat weird that they see my naked body. There's nothing wrong with my body but the thought that they can see my private part makes me feel somewhat embarrassed.

I know many guys are completely comfortable with nudity among friends and I sometimes hope I can be like them. Are there other people who feel the same? And how do you deal with these nudity situations?

I come from a culture that is quite private in terms of personal body parts.

I was in my 20's when I had to use an open, public shower. I was nervous and totally unsettled. Eventually I got used to it.

Why/How? I asked myself why I was uncomfortable being naked in front of other men. I definitely feared I would get a hardon, which would be most embarrassing indeed. Yes, I did compare myself with the other people but there were other penises like mine, and there are also some bigger, and some smaller than mine.

I decided the size of my penis is like my height, it was something I have no control over, so I just have to live with it.

That left the hardon to worry about. I tried not to look at other people and just concentrated on what I needed to do - a shower to clean myself.

It was in this way that I slowly felt less embarrassed about being naked in front of other people. That was my experience and that was how I handled it. I hope this may be of some help to you.
 
  • Like
Reactions: Uncutsouthernboy

oook

Loved Member
Joined
Sep 11, 2020
Posts
85
Media
0
Likes
582
Points
93
Location
Taipei, Taiwan
I am far less self conscious when there are just complete strangers around rather than people I already know so maybe you can try that, to help you get more used to being seen naked.
Thank you for your advice. I actually tried that before but that didn't really help. I'm guess now I can deal with situations where I have to be naked with others, by not paying attention to the others. That's what I do whenever I have to shower or get changed in the locker room. And I do feel less nervous when those people are strangers. But I also don't become more comfortable with nudity like some of my friends.
 

oook

Loved Member
Joined
Sep 11, 2020
Posts
85
Media
0
Likes
582
Points
93
Location
Taipei, Taiwan
I come from a culture that is quite private in terms of personal body parts.

I was in my 20's when I had to use an open, public shower. I was nervous and totally unsettled. Eventually I got used to it.

Why/How? I asked myself why I was uncomfortable being naked in front of other men. I definitely feared I would get a hardon, which would be most embarrassing indeed. Yes, I did compare myself with the other people but there were other penises like mine, and there are also some bigger, and some smaller than mine.

I decided the size of my penis is like my height, it was something I have no control over, so I just have to live with it.

That left the hardon to worry about. I tried not to look at other people and just concentrated on what I needed to do - a shower to clean myself.

It was in this way that I slowly felt less embarrassed about being naked in front of other people. That was my experience and that was how I handled it. I hope this may be of some help to you.
Thank you for sharing your experience. I think I have similar experiences too and my culture is similar in a sense. I never compare myself with the others though and size isn't really an issue to me. I guess it's just somehow I think being seen naked is embarrassing but I don't know why I think this way (while others seem fine with it).
 

art

Legendary Member
Joined
Nov 29, 2005
Posts
2,482
Media
0
Likes
1,612
Points
333
Location
Virginia
Sexuality
69% Straight, 31% Gay
Gender
Male
It's how you were raised/trained. The good news is that you UN-train yourself, if that's what you want to do. Or, if you prefer, stay shy about your body. Your attitude or feeling likely doesn't affect anyone but you.
 

oook

Loved Member
Joined
Sep 11, 2020
Posts
85
Media
0
Likes
582
Points
93
Location
Taipei, Taiwan
It's how you were raised/trained. The good news is that you UN-train yourself, if that's what you want to do. Or, if you prefer, stay shy about your body. Your attitude or feeling likely doesn't affect anyone but you.
I know that but it is so hard to change. Some guys I know have no problem with nudity at all. My new roommate for example usually just wears his boxer during summer and he doesn't care that there's another guy in the room. I want to be more like these people and be a bit bolder. But I don't know how.
 

Uncutsouthernboy

Superior Member
Joined
Apr 8, 2007
Posts
1,691
Media
7
Likes
6,558
Points
418
Location
Georgia
Gender
Male
Just start.
That is right. Just do it. I had been naked with friends and school mates from the begining. I was used to them. When I went to college and knew few people it was somewhat different. The majority were comfortable naked in the gym showers, dorm showers, dorm rooms, dorm hallways. When you are around a bunch of naked guys, you see that We all have the same equipment it is just packaged differently for every guy. You just pull it off and go on. Soon it is very easy and no big deal. You've seen them and they've seen you. It makes you more comfortable with yourself and others.
 
  • Like
Reactions: MarioLM

yhtang

Superior Member
Joined
Apr 10, 2006
Posts
2,434
Media
32
Likes
3,153
Points
343
Location
Malaysia
Sexuality
No Response
Gender
Male
I know that but it is so hard to change. Some guys I know have no problem with nudity at all. My new roommate for example usually just wears his boxer during summer and he doesn't care that there's another guy in the room. I want to be more like these people and be a bit bolder. But I don't know how.

I suppose at the end of the day, you would just have to find the courage and/or will power to take the first step.

Perhaps imagining the pleasures you would be able to enjoy in the company of unabashed naked men might help you start.

The journey of a thousand miles start with a single step.

I wish you the best and may you be able to break out of your mindset soon.
 

hot showers

Superior Member
Verified
Gold
Joined
Oct 3, 2013
Posts
1,218
Media
10
Likes
7,075
Points
483
Verification
View
Sexuality
99% Gay, 1% Straight
Gender
Male
That is right. Just do it. I had been naked with friends and school mates from the begining. I was used to them. When I went to college and knew few people it was somewhat different. The majority were comfortable naked in the gym showers, dorm showers, dorm rooms, dorm hallways. When you are around a bunch of naked guys, you see that We all have the same equipment it is just packaged differently for every guy. You just pull it off and go on. Soon it is very easy and no big deal. You've seen them and they've seen you. It makes you more comfortable with yourself and others.
Totally agree. Take baby steps if you need to. When I went to college, I was closeted and was really nervous about nudity as I was afraid I wouldn't be able to control erections. Our dorm bathrooms had private stalls, but towel hooks on the opposite wall. A few of the most guys would hang their towel over the shower bar, but most used the hooks, requiring some nudity in front of each other. I wanted to signal that I was "one of the guys", at ease with other guys seeing me naked. It quickly became routine that everyone saw my dick on a regular basis, that I didn't have to worry about the erection issue. I was then able to progress to open showers at the college gym, starting with off hours with nobody around and a towel nearby, eventually progressing to crowded times with the towel out in the drying area.

You didn't mention your specific reasons for your modesty, so I don't think that you had the same reason to be nervous that I did (fear of erections), but regardless, I was able to get over apprehensions about other men seeing my penis for increasing time periods through acclimation. I hope that you can do the same.
 
  • Like
Reactions: Uncutsouthernboy

oook

Loved Member
Joined
Sep 11, 2020
Posts
85
Media
0
Likes
582
Points
93
Location
Taipei, Taiwan
Totally agree. Take baby steps if you need to. When I went to college, I was closeted and was really nervous about nudity as I was afraid I wouldn't be able to control erections. Our dorm bathrooms had private stalls, but towel hooks on the opposite wall. A few of the most guys would hang their towel over the shower bar, but most used the hooks, requiring some nudity in front of each other. I wanted to signal that I was "one of the guys", at ease with other guys seeing me naked. It quickly became routine that everyone saw my dick on a regular basis, that I didn't have to worry about the erection issue. I was then able to progress to open showers at the college gym, starting with off hours with nobody around and a towel nearby, eventually progressing to crowded times with the towel out in the drying area.

You didn't mention your specific reasons for your modesty, so I don't think that you had the same reason to be nervous that I did (fear of erections), but regardless, I was able to get over apprehensions about other men seeing my penis for increasing time periods through acclimation. I hope that you can do the same.
I guess one reason is that when I grew up I had friends who always made fun of other guys in the locker room and bathroom. In the bathroom they would look at other guys' dicks at the urinals on purpose and laugh about their dick size. In the locker room they might even strip off or pants some guys and it was so humiliating. These guys are not bad guys though, but this kind of "culture" made me feel so vulnerable when I need to take off my clothes at school. With strangers, I feel a little bit better but I would still try to cover my body. I know it's not at school anymore but I'm still too self-conscious and it's quite uncomfortable that they could see my naked body. There's one time I was naked in the locker room and one naked guy just came up to ask me something, and I was so nervous that I couldn't focus on what he said at all. I guess this has something to do with my personality and upbringing: I was taught that we should not talk about or let others see our private part, and we should not talk about any topics that are sexual.
 

oook

Loved Member
Joined
Sep 11, 2020
Posts
85
Media
0
Likes
582
Points
93
Location
Taipei, Taiwan
I suppose at the end of the day, you would just have to find the courage and/or will power to take the first step.

Perhaps imagining the pleasures you would be able to enjoy in the company of unabashed naked men might help you start.

The journey of a thousand miles start with a single step.

I wish you the best and may you be able to break out of your mindset soon.
Thank you. I tried several times before it was kind of easier when I was in uni, because I had to deal with some nudity anyway, e.g., showering. But now I rarely go into these situations. And there was even one time where I tried to go to a swimming pool, but I was too nervous about the locker room situation, that I decided not to go. I don't even know what steps I could take now.
 

hot showers

Superior Member
Verified
Gold
Joined
Oct 3, 2013
Posts
1,218
Media
10
Likes
7,075
Points
483
Verification
View
Sexuality
99% Gay, 1% Straight
Gender
Male
I guess one reason is that when I grew up I had friends who always made fun of other guys in the locker room and bathroom. In the bathroom they would look at other guys' dicks at the urinals on purpose and laugh about their dick size. In the locker room they might even strip off or pants some guys and it was so humiliating. These guys are not bad guys though, but this kind of "culture" made me feel so vulnerable when I need to take off my clothes at school. With strangers, I feel a little bit better but I would still try to cover my body. I know it's not at school anymore but I'm still too self-conscious and it's quite uncomfortable that they could see my naked body. There's one time I was naked in the locker room and one naked guy just came up to ask me something, and I was so nervous that I couldn't focus on what he said at all. I guess this has something to do with my personality and upbringing: I was taught that we should not talk about or let others see our private part, and we should not talk about any topics that are sexual.
Hey man, it sounds like it's been a challenge, but it's great that you're facing your insecurities and doing it anyway. I think that over time, that will fade as it becomes more routine interacting with other men while naked. Also, in adult situations, I don't think you'll find the behavior that you described from your growing up experiences. My dick is smaller than average, but I don't let that inhibit me from getting naked and nobody has ever commented on it