Top Ten Least Common Comparisons

Discussion in 'Funny Stuff: Jokes, Quizzes, Games & Pics' started by Mibb, Feb 22, 2006.

  1. Mibb

    Mibb New Member

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    You have feet size, nose size, race and hand-breadth thought to account for an approximate indication of penis size. Anybody with half an understanding of basic human physiology would be able to know these are old wives tales but I've seen enough of these speculations going around to remind me how persistent urban legends can be.

    In this vein, I wish to forward the following baseless comparissons, to be propagated as necessary:

    [Gasp! Is there really a connection between...]

    10. Neonatal Cornea Thickness and penis size?
    9. T-shirt sleeve lenght and penis size? (is it inversely proportional?)
    8. Acne distribution and penis size?
    7. Favorite Monty Python Trouper and penis size? (good news for Eric Idle fans. Err... not too good news for John Cleese afficionadoes though).
    6. Origami Proficiency and penis size? (He who makes grand crane has grand cock.)
    5. Alternate Universe Bra Size and penis size?
    4. Pudding preference and and penis size?
    3. The Grand Cross Formation Celestial Conjunction, one's zodiac sign and penis size?
    2. Magazine Subscriptions and penis size?
    1. Leonardo Da Vinci, Opus Dei activity, the world-wide plans of the Priory of Sion and penis size? (Well, they already seem to be connected to everything else, anyway).
     
  2. Mibb

    Mibb New Member

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    According to Dan Brown at least.
     
  3. D_Elijah_MorganWood

    D_Elijah_MorganWood New Member

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    1. elbow ugliness
    2. nostril size
    3. shoe wear pattern
    4. right handed or left?
    5. amount of body hair
    6. size of asshole
    7. size of pancreas
    8. size of forehead
    9. size of calves
    10.size of adam's apple
     
  4. ClaireTalon

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    How in the world am I to determine my pancreas size? If I use the X-Ray machine of my company, you can it toasted as a barbecue tomorrow.
     
  5. D_Elijah_MorganWood

    D_Elijah_MorganWood New Member

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    Use a kitchen knife.
     
  6. B_big dirigible

    B_big dirigible New Member

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    When I had appendicitis, many many moons ago, there was some difficulty diagnosing it because the sore spot wasn't where it should be. They went in after it anyway, and found the longest appendix anyone on the surgical team could remember ever having seen. It had hurt on the wrong side because it extended from the side where it should be all the way over to the side where it shouldn't.

    A very old dentist once got very excited because I had the longest premolar roots he'd ever encountered, and he had to make a special tool to get to the bottom of them.

    Significant? Beats me, but it all has nothing to do with old urban wives.
     
  7. D_Elijah_MorganWood

    D_Elijah_MorganWood New Member

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    Seriously (and this is really faggy) I was thinking of a Golden Girls episode:
    Blanche--"You know, his feet really were that big...which means..."
    Dorothy--"He's got a big, floppy pancreas"
     
  8. D_Barbi_Queue

    D_Barbi_Queue Account Disabled

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    length of toenails
    how far he can spit a loogie (for how far he can shoot another load)
    length of nostril or ear hair
    size of his dog (inspired by the car size thread)
     
  9. D_alex8

    D_alex8 Member

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    I'm beginning to get worried about this, since I have neither a car nor a dog. How about the size of my pussy? :rolleyes:
     
  10. D_Barbi_Queue

    D_Barbi_Queue Account Disabled

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  11. D_alex8

    D_alex8 Member

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  12. D_Barbi_Queue

    D_Barbi_Queue Account Disabled

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    lol - you need to buy that pussy a bra. It's breast are sagging!
     
  13. madame_zora

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    My cat has eight saggy tits and he's a male! What makes him even funnier is that I took him for a flea treatment, and he had some weird reaction to it because he came promptly home and "manscaped" his lower stomach by chewing off all his hair!
     
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