Trouble getting hard with others

horseymann

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Well you look like a healthy individual. Sometimes stress or anxiety attacks alters erections. Again it's your brain telling you something. Consult a doctor if gets worse. Maybe a tiny dose of viagra would work.
 
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You are a great looking guy. Does the problem reoccur if/when you are with the same person more than once?

It sounds like a great time to let the other guy help you with your problem. Most guys I know would jump at the challenge to help once you explained the circumstance.
 

erratic

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If the problem only occurs with others, it's anxiety, perhaps with a good dose of shyness. I'm not a doctor, but what kind of purely physiological erectile dysfunction only strikes when the patient is with other people?

Really, the best cure for anxiety is exposure - and stressing about it is the best way to ensure that the issue will continue. Let people you're fooling around with know it can take you a while to get to full mast. (Trust me, that's not uncommon.) Then wait for nature to take its course. If you can be okay with it, the anxiety should lift enough for your dick to get hard. The more you do that, the less the anxiety will have a hold on you.

It's kind of like being pee-shy at the urinals in a bathroom. Breathe a bit and wait it out, and nature will take its course. Get all worked up over it and you'll leave frustrated.

P.S. I would disagree strongly with anyone who would suggest you try erectile dysfunction medication at this point, especially if you're not yet in middle-age or older. In my opinion, that should be an absolute last resort, and only as prescribed by a physician if you have a physical issue with maintaining erection - and that does not sound like it's the case.
 
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D_dhsr5g

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As I said on your profile page, you have a beautiful, and large cock! I don't think that there is a woman, or guy out there in their right mind that would kick you out of bed with a cock like that! Relax, and stop worrying about whether or not they will like it. Do what you do best, and for as long as you can, and the orgasms will run like water.
 

D_Aurifice_Stupher

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This. Try to refrain from masturbation for a short little while too.

Both actually. The problem the OP mentions happens to me now-and-then. Mainly nervousness when with someone new. But I've been trying to, if not completely cut back, at least reduce my exposure to porn. And reducing the number of days that I jack off. and when I do jack off, not using porn to get hard.
 

RideRocket

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I tend to get performance anxiety at times when doing it the first time. Once I'm 'comfortable' with that person though, game on. Give it some time, relax, and don't overthink it by fixating on having a hard cock.
 

B_arealthickcock

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Porn - get rid of it - and cut back on the jacking off. Jacking off trains you to be selfish and focused on your own pleasure, rather than enjoying the time with another person and thinking about their needs. Porn conditions you to dehumanize the other person and view him/her as an object that you call up exclusively to excite you. Sex isn't non-stop excitement - there's humor and tenderness (amongst other feelings) as well.
 

Cockmo

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a doc told me once. Your penis is trainable. Tell it "you are not going to cum until you perform with another person". Then wait about a week without masturbating or attempting to have sex, hook up. Hopefully, you'll be so horny that you will spring into action.
 

FuzzyKen

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Performance anxiety is normal and common. The best tool you have in your personal arsenal is your brain. Many of the suggestions in this thread may or may not work because the problem is really not physical as much as it is psychological in origin. The idea of cutting porn or masturbation etc is to deprive yourself and by doing that increase your libido to a point where the libido will over-rule the anxiety. The concept of doing this is good, but the practicality of it is dubious. A case of nerves is a case of nerves and it is possible to be both nervous and horny. I remember similar advice more than a couple of decades ago. What happened to me was not great sex. The denial of sex resulted in a state that resulted in premature ejaculation before too much happened. I was turned on and the erection worked great right up until the point of ejaculation about nine minutes later. Boy did I feel stupid then. There are two ways to deal with this and they are to deal with the root causes of the anxiety and the other one is the "chemical insurance policy" which will over time accomplish the same thing. You are not alone and your experiences are common. Good Luck. . . . . .
 

kenny233

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Man, I have the opposite problem. I get hard too easily (it seems that way to me) I think it is mental, and your nerves...

Good luck with your erections.
 

Guill

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My advice would be upfront about it and let them know that it happens. I doubt it will matter to them. If you raise the issue with them before it happens I bet it will take a lot of pressure off the situation if it does happen and it will take even more worry off of you because it's not something you're fearing them finding out happening. There's a whole you can do while waiting for it to happen to. I'm with Kenny right now...I'm hard almost instantly with someone...but I think that is because I have been very upfront and feel comfortable.
 

B_gfandme

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its all in your head. you know your cock works fine alone, so dont sweat it. We got GF gangbanged last week, there was 4 out of 10 guys couldnt get it up when their time to fuck her came around. it wasnt her, it wasnt their cock, it was their head !