trying to fix my car.

petite

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The basic difference there, though, is the TheBF acted on his feelings. My ex didn't. Imagine if the TheBF had started telling everyone you were married but without any intention of actually getting married and without consulting you that he was going to lie like that.

The social pressure on my ex was in his mind, and his 'solution' was fiction too - I did put his needs ahead of the truth and go with the lie. I now consider that a bad call, I feel I let myself down and that, ultimately, indulging his paranoia like that was letting him down as well.

I see your point, but I don't think you should be so hard on yourself. You obviously cared about his feelings and his self perception, and he put you in a difficult spot in regards to having to choose between his feelings and your own. I am like you and I think I would have done the same thing, even if I ended up having the same regrets.
 

ThickMeatJacker

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I have a little chainsaw that I use to cut down trees. Several times I've spent all day long out in the yard cutting trees and hauling them to the curb, but no one has ever offered to help me. Perhaps the hard hat and the gardening gloves inform people that I'm serious and skilled with the tools I use? I don't know. Sometimes I stick a flower behind my ear, so I don't think I look unapproachable, but maybe men just don't like approaching women holding power tools.


You, chainsaw, hard hat and work gloves? I was just really aroused... :)
 
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Stop wearing those short skirts while working under the hood. Much more attractive than a plumbers crack I suppose.
 

rockinjax

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It is probably because most(male) car nuts love girls that are into cars. Tinkering is like level 3. It need not be sexual at all.

In other words some girls see cars as competition and think they have to share the love.
 

EllieP

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Wow. Karma!!! I found myself dead on the side of the road just this morning!!! My dad taught me a lot about fixing cars, but not about how to diagnose things except for a flat tire and such..

Well, I wasn't really on the side of the road, but in the grocery parking lot. When I came out my car would not start. Seriously, nothing. Not even a grrrr or a click. Just nothing. I sat there trying to figure out what could be wrong. Key? Starter? Battery? I knew it couldn't be the battery because it started just fine to drive here.

I wanna phone a friend, Regis. Of course, no answer. So what did I do? I took the lazy way out. I got out and opened my hood and looked down at the engine.

The three nice men who showed up in less than 60 seconds did everything they could to get it started. I don't think they knew each other, but they bonded under the hood of my car. One of them even had tools! They said it was my battery. I told him I didn't think so, but he showed me on his meter thingy.

The fourth guy had heavy-duty jumper cables in his big pickup truck because the other guy's cables didn't work. I tried to pay all of them, but they politely declined. The fourth guy even followed me to AutoZone to buy a new battery just to make sure I didn't stop along the way. And both the guys at the store put it in for free. And the nice pickup truck man supervised them.

So I took the easy way out. Sue me! Those guys were very nice and were very helpful. All of those boy scouts did their good deed for the day. Don't tell Daddy, ok?
 

hypoc8

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Wow. Karma!!! I found myself dead on the side of the road just this morning!!! My dad taught me a lot about fixing cars, but not about how to diagnose things except for a flat tire and such..

Well, I wasn't really on the side of the road, but in the grocery parking lot. When I came out my car would not start. Seriously, nothing. Not even a grrrr or a click. Just nothing. I sat there trying to figure out what could be wrong. Key? Starter? Battery? I knew it couldn't be the battery because it started just fine to drive here.

I wanna phone a friend, Regis. Of course, no answer. So what did I do? I took the lazy way out. I got out and opened my hood and looked down at the engine.

The three nice men who showed up in less than 60 seconds did everything they could to get it started. I don't think they knew each other, but they bonded under the hood of my car. One of them even had tools! They said it was my battery. I told him I didn't think so, but he showed me on his meter thingy.

The fourth guy had heavy-duty jumper cables in his big pickup truck because the other guy's cables didn't work. I tried to pay all of them, but they politely declined. The fourth guy even followed me to AutoZone to buy a new battery just to make sure I didn't stop along the way. And both the guys at the store put it in for free. And the nice pickup truck man supervised them.

So I took the easy way out. Sue me! Those guys were very nice and were very helpful. All of those boy scouts did their good deed for the day. Don't tell Daddy, ok?

Ooooh I'm telling! What will your dad think now?
 

EllieP

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I'm 40 years old, but Daddy would still tell me not to talk to strange boys. They're only after one thing. I think they were after trying to fix my car.
 

NC_BBC

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Yeah I think were genetically predisposed to save damsels in distress... ESPECIALLY when they're hot. A guy may help an elderly or less attractive women out of the goodness of his heart... But when if comes to help a hot girl its all in hopes of getting her number...or anything else she may be offering....but thats just me and mho....lol
 

thirteenbyseven

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Wow. Karma!!! I found myself dead on the side of the road just this morning!!! My dad taught me a lot about fixing cars, but not about how to diagnose things except for a flat tire and such..

Well, I wasn't really on the side of the road, but in the grocery parking lot. When I came out my car would not start. Seriously, nothing. Not even a grrrr or a click. Just nothing. I sat there trying to figure out what could be wrong. Key? Starter? Battery? I knew it couldn't be the battery because it started just fine to drive here.

I wanna phone a friend, Regis. Of course, no answer. So what did I do? I took the lazy way out. I got out and opened my hood and looked down at the engine.

The three nice men who showed up in less than 60 seconds did everything they could to get it started. I don't think they knew each other, but they bonded under the hood of my car. One of them even had tools! They said it was my battery. I told him I didn't think so, but he showed me on his meter thingy.

The fourth guy had heavy-duty jumper cables in his big pickup truck because the other guy's cables didn't work. I tried to pay all of them, but they politely declined. The fourth guy even followed me to AutoZone to buy a new battery just to make sure I didn't stop along the way. And both the guys at the store put it in for free. And the nice pickup truck man supervised them.

So I took the easy way out. Sue me! Those guys were very nice and were very helpful. All of those boy scouts did their good deed for the day. Don't tell Daddy, ok?


Ellie, you're methodology is infinitely preferable to my wife who enjoys calling yours truly at whatever far-flung airport I may be at the time just to inform me, her loving husband, "I told you before to get the car serviced"- after she has just run over a pothole and ruined the tire and front-end alignment. :rolleyes:
 

B_Coconutz

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fixing from the inside went well. battery discaonnected, covers off, old stalk out, new stalk in, covers on, job done!

tinkering under the hood lasting all of five minutes before a man looked out of his window, saw a woman tinkering under the hood, grabbed a handful of tools, ran outside, insisted on doing it for me, picked up his tools and ran back into his house.

pondering this i have realised that, every time i have attempted car tinkering in public view, a man has run over to take over from me.

is this universal?

No, I can not understand why anyone would try to help you.
 

MickeyLee

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the boy respects my wrench.
and don't trespass when i'm under the hood.

up until a couple of years ago folks figured i was a dude.
so not that many folks stopping to help. unless i was pushing someone's car. dudes LOVE to help push cars.

i once scared the hell out of a lady in a dark parking lot.
her battery was dead, i shuffled over, tapped on her window.
she about died.. the only thing i could think to say was "i have boobs! and no intention to assault you"
after about 10 mins she figured out my gender, let me jump her car.

now, dudes will ramble over.. mostly cuz my car is freaking sweet! the response is usually "need help" i say "thanks, but i got it" they'll be all "where did ya get her?" i drop the "restored it myself" most guys glaze over "you are a car girl" yep :biggrin:

if someone looks lost/stuck/in need i stop, gender be damned.. a dude can be stuck with a flat/battery/out of gas just as easily as anyone else.

if a dude stops to help... i know i know what i am doing under a car. i don't get torqued.. cuz honestly? anyone helping anyone out is a positive thing, and to be encouraged. is like someone holding the door open for me. i was raised to say thank you.

same as offering to help old ladies with their bags. is just what ya meant to do.