Two good Jokes

Discussion in 'Funny Stuff: Jokes, Quizzes, Games & Pics' started by jakeatolla, Oct 13, 2006.

  1. jakeatolla

    Gold Member

    May 22, 2004
    Likes Received:
    A husband had been away for a few months and had a romantic
    evening planned for he and his wife. He sent the two older
    kids to the movies but could not persuade the youngest boy
    to go along. Finally he makes a deal with the boy.
    If the boy will go sit on the curb in front of their house,
    the father will give the boy $5 bucks for every man he sees
    go by in a red hat.

    A while later the little boy comes running into the house
    and bangs on the bedroom door and shouts "Dad, if you think
    your getting fucked in there, you'd better come outside,
    there's a Shriner convention going past."

    A man walks into the street and manages to get a taxi just going by. He gets into the taxi, and the cabbie says, "Perfect timing. You're just like Frank."

    Passenger: "Who?"

    Cabbie: "Frank . He's a guy who did everything right - all the time. Like my coming along when you needed a cab, things happened like that to Frank every single time."

    Passenger: "There are always a few clouds over everybody."

    Cabbie: "Not Frank . He was a terrific athlete. He could have won the Grand-Slam at tennis. He could golf with the pros. He sang like an opera baritone and danced like a Broadway star and you should have heard him play the piano. He was an amazing guy"

    Passenger: "Sounds like he was something really special"

    Cabbie: "There's more.......He had a memory like a computer. Could remember everybody's birthday. He knew all about wine, which foods to order and which fork to eat them with. He could fix anything. Not like me. I change a fuse, and the whole street blacks out. But Frank , he could do everything right."

    Passenger. "Wow, some guy then."

    Cabbie: "He always knew the quickest way to go in traffic and avoid traffic jams, not like me, I always seem to get stuck in them. But Frank, he never made a mistake"

    Passenger. "Mmm, there's not many like him around."

    Cabbie: "And he really knew how to treat a woman and make her feel good and never answer her back even if she was in the wrong; and his clothing was always immaculate, shoes highly polished too - he was the perfect man! He never made a mistake. No one could ever measure up to Frank ."

    Passenger: "An amazing fellow. How did you meet him?"

    Cabbie: "Well, I never actually met Frank."

    Passenger: "Then how do you know so much about him?"

    Cabbie: "I married his f├╝cking widow."
  2. B_gagger

    B_gagger New Member

    Nov 7, 2005
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    I think my boss must have been married to Frank as well.
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