Two Newlyweds Go On Their Honeymoon...

FlowerChick

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Courtesy of the Maxim mobile website.

*****

Two newlyweds go on their honeymoon. As they start getting hot and heavy, the woman says, "Please be careful with me—I'm a virgin."

The puzzled man replies, "But you've been married three times before."

"I know," she says. "But my first husband was a psychiatrist and all he wanted to do was talk about it. My second husband was a gynecologist and he just wanted to look at it. And my third husband was a stamp collector and all he wanted to do was—God, I miss him."
 

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Ok not a newlywed, but...

Two guys are on vacation. They go into the hotel bar to have beer. The notice an ugly guy at the other end of the bar. Pretty soon this beautiful blonde girl sits down next to the ugly guy. Within 15 minutes they leave arm in arm.

The next night the two guys decide to go back there before they go out on the town. The same ugly guy is sitting in the same seat as the night before. An even hotter brunette girl sits next to him. Soon they leave arm and arm.

Totally perplexed one turns to the other and says, I don't get it. All he does is sit there and lick his eyebrows.
 

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