I disagree strongly.
Nothing is outside the influence of ego. We aren't angels, we're flesh and blood human beings, and we have egos that are always with us. You of all people should realize this. Just yesterday you were writing that even though your gf loves you, wants to be with you, and says your cock is fine, you're still flipping out that you don't think you satisfy her sexually. Then later you revealed there are other issues underneath that. And now you want to say ego has no place in love? Come on, now.
This lofty ideal of love that is above ego, is a delusion. And I don't consider that a cynical opinion. Just the opposite. What my life experience has taught me is to enjoy love and lust in the present, and to be at peace with the fact that nothing is truly permanent.
I was married for 16 years with my high school sweetheart, who at one point I was madly in love with. Over time we fell out of love, but I wouldn't say I was hurt by him. He didn't do anything wrong, it just wasn't love anymore. People change.