Unprotected sex - not-so-obvious implications

Discussion in 'Et Cetera, Et Cetera' started by DC_DEEP, May 24, 2007.

  1. DC_DEEP

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    There have been a couple of threads recently in which several members have flamed me thoroughly and at times a bit viciously, because I had the nerve to advocate using protection for sexual contact. The posts to which I responded could possibly have meant "unprotected sex with an exclusive partner," but the wording of the posts sounded more like "unprotected sex with multiple partners." I was called Jerry Falwell and James Dobson (oh, the irony!), I was called a prude, I was called "the religious right" (again, the irony!), I was told to mind my own business.

    Ordinarily, my position is that what happens between consenting adults is no business of anyone else. But see, the thing is, if a sexually transmitted disease gets involved, it does become my business.

    Why would it be my business if someone I don't even know contracts or transmits an STD? Because of the ripple effect that every single transmission creates.

    The bacterial STDs: gonorrhea, chlamydia, syphilis, and chancroid, can be treated with antibiotics. The problem is that the vast majority of the population really do not know how to properly use antibiotics, even when given instructions by the doctor AND the pharmacist. And when the antibiotics are improperly used, it exponentially increases the chances of creating and spreading antibiotic-resistant strains of the organisms. Improper use of antibiotics includes not taking the full course of treatment (many people stop taking them when they begin to feel better or the symptoms diminish), drinking alcohol during the course of treatment (it stimulates the kidneys and tends to flush the drug from the bloodstream), and engaging in unprotected sex before the infection is completely cleared up (sometimes that can be a week or two after the course of treatment.)

    The three most common viral STDs are herpes, human papilloma virus, and human immunodeficiency virus. These three are permanent infections - there is no cure. All three have secondary and tertiary complications, HPV can cause cancer in both genders, herpes in women can cause serious defects in children they bear, and HIV (while it can be managed to varying degrees) is an exceptionally expensive disease to treat - and untreated, it will kill.

    While some HIV-positive people can afford to pay for their treatment, many cannot, so the cost of their treatment falls to social programs and charitable organizations.

    Even though the entire staff of the clinic where I worked were volunteers, our funding kept getting trimmed back until the clinic had to close. We were the only free and anonymous clinic in a four-county area. Many who think they should get tested will not if the clinic is not anonymous, because most states require that any other clinic report positive tests to the state health department. We reported statistics, but no personally identifiable information.

    Many infected people will pass on an infection simply because they do not know they are infected. An immoral few who know they are infected will have unprotected sex anyway, and not tell their partner(s).

    Given the enormous social health impact, it is just beyond my comprehension that people will still continue to practice these behaviors simply because "I like the way it feels when he cums inside me" or "it feels more intimate when he cums inside me" or "I don't like to wear condoms, so I don't." Of course, this does not apply in the situation of committed, exclusive relationships. But outside that constraint, if someone tries to convince you to bareback, you can be fairly certain that you aren't the only person they bareback with, and you can also be fairly certain that your chances of contracting/spreading a STD will be fairly high.
     
  2. Principessa

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    I was flamed along with you in one of those threads. It's a shame so many still don't get just how important safe sex is.

    I agree 100% with everything you said; and appreciate you doing it in such an efficient yet eloquent manner.
     
  3. Lex

    Lex
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    DC--thanks for elucidating these points. I think a lot of people don't get it. It is everyone's responsibility to halt the spread of STDs.
     
  4. Big Dreamer

    Big Dreamer New Member

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    I think that safe sex advocacy interjected into ANY sexually themed thread is appropriate and often beneficial. When you see the occasional naivete of some of OP's and respondants here, it's pretty obvious that the sexual experience level of LPSG patrons ranges from zero to journeyman (journeyperson??) and all points in between. Some people truly are looking for advice because they have no clue, and to present a picture sex being a big orgiastic romp with no potential health consequences would be irresponsible on our part to say the least.

    Great work, DC.

    And for all those who are worried about their spank session being spoiled because someone interjected a public health warning into their juicy thread, get over it.
     
  5. DC_DEEP

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    Thank you, njqt466, Lex, and Big Dreamer.

    I've also been flamed before, for asserting that most STDs could be eliminated in one or two generations, if every single person behaved ethically. I know it will never happen, but I can dream, can't I?
     
  6. Mr. Snakey

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    You are oh so right in everything you say. :cool:
     
  7. rob_just_rob

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    I am at times amazed that I have never picked up anything. I've had sexual contact with enough people that statistically, it's extremely unlikely that none of them had any STDs.

    And then it occurs to me that (with a few very rare exceptions) I've used condoms with all of them.

    And despite this, I do get tested regularly. It's called healthy paranoia, if you'll pardon the expression.
     
  8. SpoiledPrincess

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    So often the young (and not so young) and stupid think they're immortal, if someone will fuck one stranger without protection they'll fuck anyone without protection. The only time you don't need protection is when you're in an exclusive relationship with someone who you know is free of std's and you know is faithful to you.

    Figures in Britain (STD statistics for the UK) saythat std's have almost doubled since 1996 there being a 207% increase in chlamydia.

    If you're going around having unprotected sex with anyone other than an exclusive partner the odds are that sooner or later you'll end up with one std or another - let's hope you're lucky and it's only syphilis.

    When those of us with any sense see a thread celebrating the joys of fucking bareback we can feel impelled to mention the risk you're taking - it might not be on topic but honestly some of you shouldn't be allowed out without a responsible adult in charge of you.

    For fuck's sake wise up, a shag isn't worth dying for.
     
  9. D_alex8

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    How anyone can flame another person and claim that person is on a 'moral crusade' when it's a matter of saving lives and people's health ... is beyond me.

    But then again, it takes a certain (lack of) mentality to question safer sex in the first place. Playing Russian Roulette and wanting to die or endure long-term illness... obviously appeals to such idiots.

    Of course, this is only one example of people's failure to feel accountable for their own actions, or to think forward and realize the consequences of their stupidity.
     
  10. madame_zora

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    DC, if that comes up again, tap a few of us on the shoulder and we'll come state our points as well. I know I keep my nose buried in Etc., but this is an emergency!

    I stay here because with the explosive growth of the site, I just lost the will to head off the spread of misinformation on this site- a few people used to be able to do that at one point, but that's no longer possible. OUR forum is so full of crappy information being delivered as truth by people who DO NOT KNOW nearly enough to be giving such advice, it just makes me sick. I really just can't bear to watch all the hard work we did just get swept away.

    My own daughter was taught in school that condoms have a 35% failure rate. OUR OWN GOVERNMENT sanctioned lying to our own kids to "encourage abstinence"! Bull-fucking-shit, suck my goddamned asshole.

    Wake up people, your government WANTS you to die of AIDS- well thay want you to contract it anyway. Then you can be treated by expensive chemicals for the rest of your life because there's no cure! How convenient is that? Fucking idiots, while you chomp on a big bag of funions watching American Idol and seeing Britney Spear's mudflaps on the evening news, getting horny and fucking (but feeling guilty about it) without a condom because they don't help anyway, you produce a lot of gifts for the government. Diseases, unwanted children, depression (ooh, that's a cash cow, drugs for the rest of your life!) and finally the breaking of your spirit, which is what stops you from killing everyone you see when you finally realise what's been going on all along.

    Sigh.

    Use a fucking condom, they're somewhere around 99.7% effective. If you don't ruin your own life by bad decisions early on, you just might avoid a life of depression and addiction to meds with some really nasty side-effects. Stop acting like it's just too fucking hard for you to figure out what the right thing to do is, goddamned retards.
     
  11. jeff black

    jeff black <img border="0" src="/images/badges/gold_member.gi

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    Life= good.
    Condoms = good.


    Understand?

    People are selfish. They don't want to take the 10 seconds to put the condom on. They dont' want to reduce the sensation they will feel with a piece of latex wrapped firmly around their dick. They don't want to go to the store to buy condoms because they are embarassed.

    Time to grow up, children. We live in a world that has potential. Let's not ruin it by killing off some of our best and brightest of the new generations with a simple case of the selfish.
     
  12. Lex

    Lex
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    I agree. I just need a heads up. I haven't left ETC in months and, yes, the site used to be full of accurate, useful info. SIGH.

    We should hope that they do.
     
  13. Gillette

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    I'll share that dream if you don't mind.

    It's so easily preventable! Why would anyone not do this?
     
  14. B_Kshelby67

    B_Kshelby67 New Member

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    I remember in high school when I was in health class (way before I had lost my virginity), we were learning about the spread of STDs. Now, don't get me wrong, high school health class was a joke, trying to instill the fear of disease to prevent anyone from having sex ever (same way with drugs for that matter).
    Anyway, I recall this whole handshaking situation, where a few people had an STD, and the rest were healthy. By the end of the whole handshaking thing, we could see visually how the disease can spread from just a couple people to the entire class.
    I certianly never grasped the abstinence only concept, but I sure as hell alllllllllways used a condom. That exercise freaked me the fuck out.
    I think it is easier for women to get tested regularly, since we are supposed to see a obgyn at the very least once a year, and I know mine has always tested me for everything, even while I was in a monogomous relationship for 4 years. I ask every man I've been with if he has been tested, and basically refuse to sleep with him if he hasn't. I don't fuck around.
     
  15. DC_DEEP

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    I dunno, G. If every person who is sexually active decided to go super-proactive, and swore off sex for a couple of months, and got tested, and behaved ethically afterward (whether negative or positive for any of the diseases) it could be eliminated. Would that ever happen? Nope. So sad.
    You are new to our group, but I'm really really liking what I see in your posts. Just the way I like my women - bright and headstrong.

    I appreciate you making a slight concession of an excuse for guys (the "easier for women" comment) but I'm not going to let them off the hook that easily. Men should get a physical once a year, too. And keep on kicking 'em to the curb if they even mention that they don't want to wear a condom. That's like saying "my mouth says I'm virus-free, but my blood says I'm not."
     
  16. sdg475

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    People flamed you for advocating the use of protection? Maybe it's because I am young and wrapping it up has always been the norm through out my life, but not using a condom with multiple partners seems archaic. I'm not saying if you are in a long term relationship (or you have gotten tested together) and are using other forms of birth control (assuming you're not aiming for pregnancy) that you need to use a condom, but if you're hopping around from partner to partner whom have unknown sexual pasts why wouldn't you use one?
     
  17. LeeEJ

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    DC_DEEP, how can you write something like this? I mean, jeez, it.. um.. well.. you see, ....

    Man, I can't even play devil's advocate on this one.. lol
     
  18. LouisVauban

    LouisVauban New Member

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    DC: I support your comments 100%. Am glad you started this thread.

    Coming out in my early 20's 1985 was a scary experience... and EVERYWHERE you looked there were billboards and posters and news stories about safe sex.

    It became a regimen for me... Not even something I questioned. Use the glove or you were playing russian roullette, while thousands were dying around us.

    There is a strange perception "out there" these days that HIV is a "manageable" infection and that people don't die anymore from AIDS.

    You'll question how manageable the infection is, when you are racing a loved-one or dear friend to the emergency room, making sure they stay on the ENDLESS daily pill regimen, endless doctor visits and blood tests. Sure most people are living with the infection these days, but the life they are forced to live is not always the normal one so many of us take for granted.

    And YES, people are STILL dying of AIDS in America, not to mention the millions in underdeveloped nations.

    I realize scare tactics are usually detrimental and useless... but, it sure did get me to step-up and make the latex a non-negotiable habit. (We're talking anal, in my case.)

    It is a free society and we cannot police people for what they do privately.
    But, the more people on boards like this talk about this topic and discourage acceptance of unsafe sex, and challenge "the cool" thing, maybe, JUST MAYBE, some that are engaging in this behavior will check the attitude and think twice.

    And don't get me started about Giving and Receiving "THE GIFT." This just blows my mind and gets me SO ANGRY.
     
  19. B_ScaredLittleBoy

    B_ScaredLittleBoy New Member

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    Not using a condom could easily be the plot for 'Deathwish [whatever it is]'

    Even if you don't die, you put yourself at an unnecessary risk. Why take a chance when you can use a condom and have peace of mind and still have your genitals in full working order?

    It's silly and I don't see how anyone could be 'flamed' for promoting common sense. The issue is mainly (fully) with the people that chastise you. Who are probably also the people spreading nasty (and sometimes deadly) STD's.

    And I've heard the AIDS (etc) could be wiped out in a generation too with better education/if everyone took precautions. I think its true although very very unlikely.

    If anyone is still going to try and promote unprotected sex, they should first look at pictures of all the diseases you can catch. And they are all preventable, with a rubber. There is no excuse not to use one.

    http://www.brooksidepress.org/Products/OBGYN_101/MyDocuments4/Text/Discharge/chlamydia1640.jpg

    (I think that used to be a cock) - That link is not for the squeamish :tongue:
     
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