- Joined
- Nov 25, 2006
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- 69% Straight, 31% Gay
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- Male
Americans are reviled in some parts of the world because we tend to expect our whims to be catered to. While so much of the earths human population is still struggling to enjoy some fraction of what we take for granted or are even struggling merely to survive, we concern ourselves with consumption of goods and services on a grotesque scale. We structure fantastic expectations for ourselves and our lives, feeling heartily disappointed when things dont turn out just so.
Thus, I am hesitant to post my own, possibly unrealistic, expectations because they may simply underscore how perfectly typical an American I truly am. Nonetheless, LPSG has impressed me as a forum where one can indeed share just about anything; so, here goes:
1. I want to fall in love and marry again. Thats not so unrealistic sounding, especially since she doesnt have to have a certain color of hair or eyes or skin, be a certain height or have a certain bra size, attend a certain church or even agree with me politically. [Though we were from different religious backgrounds, grew up in different parts of the country, and belonged to different political parties, I was completely, happily, monogamously in love with my first wife before she died, and I expect that can happen again.] However, there are some conditions to complicate things. While I wouldnt want an open marriage, my wife would have to know and accept that I have had numerous partners of both genders in the past (before and after, but not during, my first marriage). She would have to want to be a parent because, through her own pregnancy, through adoption, or through surrogacy, I would want us to have several children. She would have to be a college graduate because I value educated minds and know how to relax in social situations because Im expected to be in those situations with some frequency Okay, this may sound like it should be in the personals section, but my real question is not are YOU that person (but do feel free to respond if you think you are), but rather, how likely is it that I am going to find her?
2. Until I find myself joyfully hooking up with another human for the rest of our lives, Id like to enjoy some wholesome sexual experiences. Fuck buddies sounds rather crass, but maybe thats the best way to describe it. Sex is so intensely personal an experience, particularly when Im with a woman, that Ive rarely just fucked a woman never in fact. Theyve all been women Ive known and cared about, and just two have been one-fuck-only affairs. Sex with men has run the gamut from anonymous (but never faceless) servicing my dick, to several long term relationships based on servicing my needs (and not a lot in the way of me having to reciprocate). A number of the women and men claimed to be in love with me, but the only time I knew I was in love was with the woman who became my wife. If I am going to have casual sex with someone, male or female, I like for them to be damn good looking. That hasnt been the case 100% of the time, but Ive rarely been so horny that casual sex was the goal regardless of my partners appeal. So, given all of that and my desire to behave with some discretion, how likely am I to find fuck or suck buddies of either gender? How many smooth, nicely built guys who love to suck cock are there out there? Are there many intelligent and beautiful women who enjoy casual but intense sex with guys they know they wont marry? This is not meant to be insulting to anyone, but Im experiencing a shortage of partners and an excess of need.
3. I want my children (when and if they arrive) to have every genetic, social, financial, and environmental advantage I can give them not so I can spoil them or so they can dominate others, but so that they will never be dominated by others so that they can confidently, compassionately, intelligently, thoughtfully, happily and ethically contribute to this existence. The genes I bring to the mix are pretty good, and I would hope to marry a woman whose genetic legacy is similarly strong. Most importantly, we would have to be in love with each other; but if she is athletic and smart, if the men in her family are well endowed, if her family tends to be naturally smooth (as opposed to hairy), and if she just plain looks good, not only would I enjoy being in love with her even more, I would feel we were more likely to bestow wonderful genetic gifts upon our children. Is this simply a natural parental desire, or am I being too superficial here?
4. I want to live well past 100. Not just live, I want to continue to swim, lift weights, travel, build things, participate in politics, make love to my wife, and play with my children, grandchildren, and great-grandchildren. Given the longevity of some of my ancestors and the healthy life I am trying to live, I am pretty sure I will make it to at least 100. Given the advances in medical knowledge already, not to mention what is anticipated, life expectancy for everyone should be increasing.
5. Id like more guy friends. Guys to hang out with, do projects with, travel with. The dynamic will depend a lot on who is married, etc., but guys dont seem to bond as much as women do. [Yeah, this is where my LPSG name comes into all of this.] If one doesnt go to bars or casinos, do recreational drugs or alcohol, watch football, eat meat (and therefore, need to barbeque), or watch porn, what are the venues for hanging out or even meeting other like-minded guys? Its not that I am friendless or that I dont meet people doing the various things I do already, its that I dont really feel close to anyone outside of my family and some longtime friends (who are often very involved in their childrens needs and activities).
So, yes, I know this has a lot to do with how I put myself out there, and I would appreciate any advice on more effectively meeting people who will share my interests. The other question remains, though: how realistic is it for me to think I can do all of the above?
Thus, I am hesitant to post my own, possibly unrealistic, expectations because they may simply underscore how perfectly typical an American I truly am. Nonetheless, LPSG has impressed me as a forum where one can indeed share just about anything; so, here goes:
1. I want to fall in love and marry again. Thats not so unrealistic sounding, especially since she doesnt have to have a certain color of hair or eyes or skin, be a certain height or have a certain bra size, attend a certain church or even agree with me politically. [Though we were from different religious backgrounds, grew up in different parts of the country, and belonged to different political parties, I was completely, happily, monogamously in love with my first wife before she died, and I expect that can happen again.] However, there are some conditions to complicate things. While I wouldnt want an open marriage, my wife would have to know and accept that I have had numerous partners of both genders in the past (before and after, but not during, my first marriage). She would have to want to be a parent because, through her own pregnancy, through adoption, or through surrogacy, I would want us to have several children. She would have to be a college graduate because I value educated minds and know how to relax in social situations because Im expected to be in those situations with some frequency Okay, this may sound like it should be in the personals section, but my real question is not are YOU that person (but do feel free to respond if you think you are), but rather, how likely is it that I am going to find her?
2. Until I find myself joyfully hooking up with another human for the rest of our lives, Id like to enjoy some wholesome sexual experiences. Fuck buddies sounds rather crass, but maybe thats the best way to describe it. Sex is so intensely personal an experience, particularly when Im with a woman, that Ive rarely just fucked a woman never in fact. Theyve all been women Ive known and cared about, and just two have been one-fuck-only affairs. Sex with men has run the gamut from anonymous (but never faceless) servicing my dick, to several long term relationships based on servicing my needs (and not a lot in the way of me having to reciprocate). A number of the women and men claimed to be in love with me, but the only time I knew I was in love was with the woman who became my wife. If I am going to have casual sex with someone, male or female, I like for them to be damn good looking. That hasnt been the case 100% of the time, but Ive rarely been so horny that casual sex was the goal regardless of my partners appeal. So, given all of that and my desire to behave with some discretion, how likely am I to find fuck or suck buddies of either gender? How many smooth, nicely built guys who love to suck cock are there out there? Are there many intelligent and beautiful women who enjoy casual but intense sex with guys they know they wont marry? This is not meant to be insulting to anyone, but Im experiencing a shortage of partners and an excess of need.
3. I want my children (when and if they arrive) to have every genetic, social, financial, and environmental advantage I can give them not so I can spoil them or so they can dominate others, but so that they will never be dominated by others so that they can confidently, compassionately, intelligently, thoughtfully, happily and ethically contribute to this existence. The genes I bring to the mix are pretty good, and I would hope to marry a woman whose genetic legacy is similarly strong. Most importantly, we would have to be in love with each other; but if she is athletic and smart, if the men in her family are well endowed, if her family tends to be naturally smooth (as opposed to hairy), and if she just plain looks good, not only would I enjoy being in love with her even more, I would feel we were more likely to bestow wonderful genetic gifts upon our children. Is this simply a natural parental desire, or am I being too superficial here?
4. I want to live well past 100. Not just live, I want to continue to swim, lift weights, travel, build things, participate in politics, make love to my wife, and play with my children, grandchildren, and great-grandchildren. Given the longevity of some of my ancestors and the healthy life I am trying to live, I am pretty sure I will make it to at least 100. Given the advances in medical knowledge already, not to mention what is anticipated, life expectancy for everyone should be increasing.
5. Id like more guy friends. Guys to hang out with, do projects with, travel with. The dynamic will depend a lot on who is married, etc., but guys dont seem to bond as much as women do. [Yeah, this is where my LPSG name comes into all of this.] If one doesnt go to bars or casinos, do recreational drugs or alcohol, watch football, eat meat (and therefore, need to barbeque), or watch porn, what are the venues for hanging out or even meeting other like-minded guys? Its not that I am friendless or that I dont meet people doing the various things I do already, its that I dont really feel close to anyone outside of my family and some longtime friends (who are often very involved in their childrens needs and activities).
So, yes, I know this has a lot to do with how I put myself out there, and I would appreciate any advice on more effectively meeting people who will share my interests. The other question remains, though: how realistic is it for me to think I can do all of the above?