Unwanted advances?

[danjs584]

I'm very surprised to find how gay my gym is. I've always figured in big cities you are bound to find lots of gay guys at the gym but I figured suburbs probably wouldn't have as many, or at least not have as many who are openly displaying it. My gym is in a very blue collar suburb about 25 miles outside boston. I've been shocked at how many guys there are blatantly obvious about staring at my dick, not just a quick glance. A lot of the guys in the steam room and sauna will start to slowly jerk off after a couple minutes of being in there. I've been at this gym for almost a year. Until a week ago this was as far as it went. Guys would slowly jerk off but stop if someone directly looked at them and normally they would stop after a few minutes and leave (maybe bc I wasn't joining in?) This past week though has been ridiculous though. I went Saturday and I walked in the sauna and obviously interupted the 2 guys in there bc they jumped apart as I opened the door and one was fully hard. After a minute of sitting there the guy flat out asked me if I was gay. I hesitated a moment and then said yes. Instantly the guy grabbed my cock and tried to start jerking me off. I stopped him though because I felt too weird about it. After another minute the guy bent over and tried to suck me but I stopped him again. A few minutes later getting out of the shower he grabbed my dick again. Yesterday I went again and this time a different guy was slowly stroking. A different guy walked in and the first guy left for a minute. This second guy started talking to me and told me how hot it was sucking my cock a few weeks ago. I told him I didn't think it was me he was remembering...he said he wouldn't forget a cock like mine. I told him I knew it wasn't me because I had never fooled around with a guy at the gym. Anyway, he started jerking off and the other guy came back in and started to also. The guy who thought he had sucked me tried to suck me but I stopped him.

Anyway, sorry to post such a long thing but I guess my point is this: I'm gay and obviously fine with other people being gay too but I don't understand why so many guys assume that just because you are gay it gives them permission to start touching you without permission and will still try a few more times when you say no. If a guy ever did this to a girl she would be having him arrested assault or molestation or whatever the term is for this yet for some reason it's acceptable for guys to do to guys. I enjoy seeing a nice dick in the locker room but I think it is at the very least very distasteful to just assume someone wants you to grab their dick. Any thoughts?

 

[B_NineInchCock_160IQ]

Has never ever happened to me. Are you sure you're not going to a gay gym?

 

[danjs584]

Has never ever happened to me. Are you sure you're not going to a gay gym?

pretty sure...it's a pretty big gym and the majority are definitely straight...most of the straight ones though don't go in the steam room or sauna

i know i'm putting myself in the situation when i go in but it would be nice to sit and relax in there without this happening...oh well

 

[iowamojoe]

hey man,
i'm gay, too, and can relate. i feel like over the years, gay guys have gotten more aggressive in public places like gyms. in a way, it's an addiction that's hard for some guys to stop. i can't tell you how many times i've seen guys fooling around...even fucking on a couple of occasions...in chicago and seattle gyms. crazy. basically, they pick you up on gaydar and, if you have a dick they like, they become obsessed. keep in mind, too, that you may be giving off a sexual vibe without even knowing it.

 

[TANKERMAN8C]

I Belong To A Gym Here In Ohio And I Know What You Are Going Through. Being An Older Gay Man, I Seem To Have The Younger Guys Cruising Me And Following Me Home To My Neighborhood. The Next Time I See Them In The Gym, I Just Ask Them How They Liked My House!...they Will Either Fuss Up Or They Will Take The Hint That I Will Ask Them Out For A Drink...thanks...tankerman8c

 

[canuck_pa]

While I've never had any unwanted advances at the gym I have in washrooms.

When you're in the sauna or steamroom do you sit on your towel or wrap it around you? If your exposed perhaps wrapping in a towel will stop them.

Just a thought....

 

[iowamojoe]

trust me, a towel won't stop 'em.

 

[danjs584]

hey man,
i'm gay, too, and can relate. i feel like over the years, gay guys have gotten more aggressive in public places like gyms. in a way, it's an addiction that's hard for some guys to stop. i can't tell you how many times i've seen guys fooling around...even fucking on a couple of occasions...in chicago and seattle gyms. crazy. basically, they pick you up on gaydar and, if you have a dick they like, they become obsessed. keep in mind, too, that you may be giving off a sexual vibe without even knowing it.

Yes! You summarized it perfectly. I'm not sure if I'm giving off a sexual vibe or not--I'm not trying to but maybe I am without realizing it.

While I've never had any unwanted advances at the gym I have in washrooms.

When you're in the sauna or steamroom do you sit on your towel or wrap it around you? If your exposed perhaps wrapping in a towel will stop them.

Just a thought....

I sit on my towel. I feel like I can relax a lot better without it wrapped around me. I also do enjoy being naked, I just don't like it when people think it's an open invitation to grab my dick.

 

[str82fcuk]

if you dont want to use a towel, then cover your dick with your hand if someone stares at it too long, and stare back for about five seconds while you do it

theres no need to give a straight answer if sumun asks if youre gay - you might say "not at the gym" in response instead

all that being said, I've had similar experiences and have noticed guys becoming more agressive ... I think they think if you're gay you won't complain ... but maybe a word to the gym manager is not out of order ...
obviously the str8 guys dont go to the sauna and have just given up but wtf are you paying fees for ... there are places other than gyms for that kind of thing ...

 

[WellHung83]

I get the odd stare and maybe an occassional wink, but nothing gratituous or out of line and the gym where I go to my Spin classes is in the city and quite large and modern. I guess the gyms in the city will have a larger gay membership than straight as a lot of gay and bi men live and work in the central business district ( CBD ) and so go to gyms that are close to their workplace and apartments.

 

[simcha]

I'm averagely hung and the gym can be a mine-field for me. When I was only a little younger, very young guys would cruise me and attempt to grab me underneath my towel.

I have to tell you that one day I gave in. I was tired and heck the younger guy was cute. He reached over, stroked me and then sucked me off, in the steam room, no less!

It was a suburban gym full of straight guys. I don't know if we gay guys give off a vibe or what. All I know is that when I've gone to the gym I get attention...

 

[HazelGod]

I've often asked myself...why do all these homosexuals keep sucking my cock?

 

[danjs584]

I've often asked myself...why do all these homosexuals keep sucking my cock?

Hahahaha

 

[iowamojoe]

dude, i'm not the biggest guy here, but i get my share of attention and i've got to admit, i actually enjoy being checked out. straight and gay guys do it. it's sort of a rush. bottom line: if you don't want to be grabbed, just say no...or be firm and tell 'em to fuck off. it works. if you REALLY don't want the advances, you can put an end to them.

 

[danjs584]

dude, i'm not the biggest guy here, but i get my share of attention and i've got to admit, i actually enjoy being checked out. straight and gay guys do it. it's sort of a rush. bottom line: if you don't want to be grabbed, just say no...or be firm and tell 'em to fuck off. it works. if you REALLY don't want the advances, you can put an end to them.

Yeah, it's hard to find that balance though...I don't mind if someone is looking and don't want to make issue of it. Everyone has the right to look and even stare for a long time and be one of those creapy guys but a line has been crossed when they start grabbing you. It's too bad that a lot of guys confuse being someone being courteous and polite when being spoken to with that person inviting a sexual advance.

Also on a sidenote, I think part of the hotness of a sauna/steam room is the sexual tension but inability to act on it. :tongue:

 

[iowamojoe]

i totally agree with you on all points, including the sexual tension in a sauna/steam. it sounds bad, but frankly, your best bet is to avoid a lot of eye contact. i've found that even when i mistakenly lock eyes for a split second with one of the over-eager guys, they take it as an invite. i try to be cool, but you're right, it is an invasion.

 

[PornForPatric]

I find a simple "No, thanks" works fine. 99% of guys will take a "no, thanks" and move on. For that 1%, a hard slap on the hand seems to work wonders when coupled with a "NO. THANKS."

 

[yngjock20]

The part about the guy confusing your cock with another guys cock was hilarious. He obviously did forget that cock.

Seriously though, I've gotten men who just didn't wanna take "no" for an answer and it really sucks. Unfortunately, there are only two ways to stop those guys. Tell on them or leave and never go back.

As much as you like the sauna, I'm sure there's another one around that you can start frequenting. Maybe you should start going to another one of those gyms since it's a chain gym.

 

[danjs584]

The part about the guy confusing your cock with another guys cock was hilarious. He obviously did forget that cock.

Seriously though, I've gotten men who just didn't wanna take "no" for an answer and it really sucks. Unfortunately, there are only two ways to stop those guys. Tell on them or leave and never go back.

As much as you like the sauna, I'm sure there's another one around that you can start frequenting. Maybe you should start going to another one of those gyms since it's a chain gym.

Who said it's a chain gym? :tongue: Anyway, it's not gonna stop me from going to this gym...it's one of the few good ones in the area. I realize there's not much I can do to stop this besides saying no repeatedly or telling on them and making it pretty awkward around there. I guess I was more just looking to see how many other people this happens to and get your opinions on it :wink:

 

[2big]

this doesn't have anything to do with a gym, but i went out dancing for the first time in a long time this past weekend. i have been to this club before but forgot how forward people get after 2am. (most local bars close at 2, this one stays open till 4 or 5). i was dancing trying to burn off some alcohol i drank so i could drive home, and the floor kept getting more and more crowded. before i really knew what was happening, somebody had undone my pants, reached into my underwear, to which he pulled out my cock and started swinging it around.
i am VERY aware of myself in public, but i think the combination of drinking and being so crowded on the dance floor that i really didn't know what was going on until i felt myself being tossed around by this guy. he started 'wooo hooo'-ing and people started looking as i was trying to then get my cock back from his vice-like grip. at that point, he was in total control because as i tried more and more to make him let go, he grabbed harder and more people started watching this spectacle unfold. he finally let go, i put everything away and immediately left the club.
i don't know what possessed him in the first place to expose me like that (i didn't know the guy) but needless to say a LOT of people got an eye-full that night. i was so pissed i dont think i'll be visiting that place any time soon.