Virgin Sex

1

13788

Guest
smartguy101: Hey Guys. I have a friend who I have been dating for the past few months. We haven't had sex yet because he has a large penis and I haven't been with another man before. We're trying to make this last, but we can't figure out what to do. When I say big, I mean in the sense of girth. 9 x 7.5in. cut. Even with lube, we've had problems with anal sex. We spent 1 hour working just to get me used to the head of his penis. Is this how it is supposed to be normally? We like each other waaay too much to throw this chance away so I have time for replies. We're being patient. Any guys have any advice? It would really do us ALOT of good. SEE YA !!!
 

ziggity

Sexy Member
Joined
Jan 14, 2005
Posts
189
Media
3
Likes
25
Points
163
Age
37
Location
bay area CA
i'm a small guy and i exercise friggin constantly (my PC and anal muscles too, long story) so when i first wanted to take a toy, i was splitting open at just 1.5" diameter. what you need to do is invest in an anal training toy (or a set of them). they don't stretch you much, but they get your ass used to dilating a lot easier.. in my experience, anyway. putting anything up there still hurts for me but training with toys (wearing a plug all day especially) helps a lot with your tolerance and ability to relax, as well as a bit of stretching.
 

Pappy

Member
Joined
Apr 5, 2004
Posts
2,084
Media
0
Likes
19
Points
258
Location
Outta Here
ziggity offers great advice. Start by using small toys and gradually working up to large ones. Always remember to relax and push out when he is atempting to penetrate you. Use lots of lube on him and in you. And fingers do wonders in opening you up during foreplay. Take it slow and easy as you are now and you should find success.
 

Kimahri

Cherished Member
Joined
Jan 4, 2005
Posts
1,258
Media
6
Likes
399
Points
303
Location
Bel Air (Maryland, United States)
Sexuality
90% Gay, 10% Straight
Gender
Male
I think the concern falls when he gets close to climaxing. If he's like some people I know and start jackhammering, it's going to hurt quite a bit.

I like the idea about the small toys though. I'll have to try that in preparation. :)
 

KinkGuy

Expert Member
Joined
Mar 19, 2004
Posts
2,794
Media
0
Likes
156
Points
268
Age
70
Location
southwest US
Sexuality
90% Gay, 10% Straight
Gender
Male
Just a thought, but get your guy to work on your hole WITH YOU. Make a promise for these "training sessions" that only fingers, the toys you choose and maybe a little tongue action will take place, that he won't try to fuck you. It will maybe help you get used to having him play with you, relax you and help get you ready to his cock......when you are ready. In the meantime, it's playtime!!! Certainly would be good for the level of intimacy you feel for each other.
 

jeepwranglerboi

Experimental Member
Joined
Aug 4, 2004
Posts
800
Media
0
Likes
8
Points
238
Age
34
Location
Manhattan
Sexuality
99% Gay, 1% Straight
Gender
Male
Great idea KinkGuy! My best advice is just to relax as much as possible and go slow. I hate to suggest this but it may work, if you are of drinking age try a glass of wine. Vino gets me very physicaly warm as well as horny but it is also very relaxing to me. I hate to encourage anyone to try alcohol in order to take a large penis but it may help in easing up the process. Best of luck! :)
 

viking

Experimental Member
Joined
Dec 9, 2004
Posts
360
Media
5
Likes
7
Points
163
Age
57
Location
San Francisco / Oakland
Sexuality
90% Straight, 10% Gay
Gender
Male
Originally posted by jeepwranglerboi@Jan 27 2005, 03:22 PM
Great idea KinkGuy! My best advice is just to relax as much as possible and go slow. I hate to suggest this but it may work, if you are of drinking age try a glass of wine. Vino gets me very physicaly warm as well as horny but it is also very relaxing to me. I hate to encourage anyone to try alcohol in order to take a large penis but it may help in easing up the process. Best of luck! :)
[post=278009]Quoted post[/post]​

How much wine should I bring then?
Was that two bottles or three??
 

jeepwranglerboi

Experimental Member
Joined
Aug 4, 2004
Posts
800
Media
0
Likes
8
Points
238
Age
34
Location
Manhattan
Sexuality
99% Gay, 1% Straight
Gender
Male
Originally posted by ebviking+Jan 27 2005, 11:24 PM--><div class='quotetop'>QUOTE(ebviking &#064; Jan 27 2005, 11:24 PM)</div><div class='quotemain'><!--QuoteBegin-jeepwranglerboi@Jan 27 2005, 03:22 PM
Great idea KinkGuy&#33; My best advice is just to relax as much as possible and go slow. I hate to suggest this but it may work, if you are of drinking age try a glass of wine. Vino gets me very physicaly warm as well as horny but it is also very relaxing to me. I hate to encourage anyone to try alcohol in order to take a large penis but it may help in easing up the process.  Best of luck&#33; :)
[post=278009]Quoted post[/post]​

How much wine should I bring then?
Was that two bottles or three??
[post=278010]Quoted post[/post]​
[/b][/quote]
LOL I&#39;m not a lush&#33; Well, that depends... I can drink a bottle by myself but that gets me pretty tipsy. ;)
 

viking

Experimental Member
Joined
Dec 9, 2004
Posts
360
Media
5
Likes
7
Points
163
Age
57
Location
San Francisco / Oakland
Sexuality
90% Straight, 10% Gay
Gender
Male
Originally posted by jeepwranglerboi+Jan 27 2005, 03:29 PM--><div class='quotetop'>QUOTE(jeepwranglerboi &#064; Jan 27 2005, 03:29 PM)</div><div class='quotemain'>
Originally posted by ebviking@Jan 27 2005, 11:24 PM
<!--QuoteBegin-jeepwranglerboi
@Jan 27 2005, 03:22 PM
Great idea KinkGuy&#33; My best advice is just to relax as much as possible and go slow. I hate to suggest this but it may work, if you are of drinking age try a glass of wine. Vino gets me very physicaly warm as well as horny but it is also very relaxing to me. I hate to encourage anyone to try alcohol in order to take a large penis but it may help in easing up the process.  Best of luck&#33; :)
[post=278009]Quoted post[/post]​


How much wine should I bring then?
Was that two bottles or three??
[post=278010]Quoted post[/post]​
LOL I&#39;m not a lush&#33; Well, that depends... I can drink a bottle by myself but that gets me pretty tipsy. ;)
[post=278013]Quoted post[/post]​
[/b][/quote]

Hot & nasty tipsy??
Like, tie you up with duct tape tipsy??
 

jeepwranglerboi

Experimental Member
Joined
Aug 4, 2004
Posts
800
Media
0
Likes
8
Points
238
Age
34
Location
Manhattan
Sexuality
99% Gay, 1% Straight
Gender
Male
Originally posted by ebviking+Jan 27 2005, 11:33 PM--><div class='quotetop'>QUOTE(ebviking &#064; Jan 27 2005, 11:33 PM)</div><div class='quotemain'>
Originally posted by jeepwranglerboi@Jan 27 2005, 03:29 PM
Originally posted by ebviking@Jan 27 2005, 11:24 PM
<!--QuoteBegin-jeepwranglerboi
@Jan 27 2005, 03:22 PM
Great idea KinkGuy&#33; My best advice is just to relax as much as possible and go slow. I hate to suggest this but it may work, if you are of drinking age try a glass of wine. Vino gets me very physicaly warm as well as horny but it is also very relaxing to me. I hate to encourage anyone to try alcohol in order to take a large penis but it may help in easing up the process.  Best of luck&#33; :)
[post=278009]Quoted post[/post]​


How much wine should I bring then?
Was that two bottles or three??
[post=278010]Quoted post[/post]​

LOL I&#39;m not a lush&#33; Well, that depends... I can drink a bottle by myself but that gets me pretty tipsy. ;)
[post=278013]Quoted post[/post]​

Hot & nasty tipsy??
Like, tie you up with duct tape tipsy??
[post=278016]Quoted post[/post]​
[/b][/quote]
Duct tape&#33; Ouch&#33;&#33;&#33; Now a silk rope on the other hand... ;)
 

viking

Experimental Member
Joined
Dec 9, 2004
Posts
360
Media
5
Likes
7
Points
163
Age
57
Location
San Francisco / Oakland
Sexuality
90% Straight, 10% Gay
Gender
Male
Originally posted by jeepwranglerboi+Jan 27 2005, 03:34 PM--><div class='quotetop'>QUOTE(jeepwranglerboi &#064; Jan 27 2005, 03:34 PM)</div><div class='quotemain'>
Originally posted by ebviking@Jan 27 2005, 11:33 PM
Originally posted by jeepwranglerboi@Jan 27 2005, 03:29 PM
Originally posted by ebviking@Jan 27 2005, 11:24 PM
<!--QuoteBegin-jeepwranglerboi
@Jan 27 2005, 03:22 PM
Great idea KinkGuy&#33; My best advice is just to relax as much as possible and go slow. I hate to suggest this but it may work, if you are of drinking age try a glass of wine. Vino gets me very physicaly warm as well as horny but it is also very relaxing to me. I hate to encourage anyone to try alcohol in order to take a large penis but it may help in easing up the process.  Best of luck&#33; :)
[post=278009]Quoted post[/post]​


How much wine should I bring then?
Was that two bottles or three??
[post=278010]Quoted post[/post]​

LOL I&#39;m not a lush&#33; Well, that depends... I can drink a bottle by myself but that gets me pretty tipsy. ;)
[post=278013]Quoted post[/post]​


Hot & nasty tipsy??
Like, tie you up with duct tape tipsy??
[post=278016]Quoted post[/post]​
Duct tape&#33; Ouch&#33;&#33;&#33; Now a silk rope on the other hand... ;)
[post=278017]Quoted post[/post]​
[/b][/quote]

Hey, I&#39;ve got that too.
I was just trying to get a read on the tipsy scale.

I have to admit though, Having you tied and bound and in my control
is awfully erotic.
 

txquis

Sexy Member
Joined
Feb 25, 2003
Posts
1,682
Media
0
Likes
69
Points
368
Sexuality
100% Gay, 0% Straight
Gender
Male
Dont try to insert the bottle of wine.
Drink it, drink it&#33; :p

i&#39;m versatile and i had always been a top,
so when my ex persuaded (read: begged) me to "flip", i wanted to oblige.
It wasn&#39;t easy the first time.
So, i took the advice given above, and got a small toy...and worked up
to the real thing.
Trust me, it works.
No problems so far.
;)
 

jeepwranglerboi

Experimental Member
Joined
Aug 4, 2004
Posts
800
Media
0
Likes
8
Points
238
Age
34
Location
Manhattan
Sexuality
99% Gay, 1% Straight
Gender
Male
Originally posted by ebviking+Jan 27 2005, 11:39 PM--><div class='quotetop'>QUOTE(ebviking &#064; Jan 27 2005, 11:39 PM)</div><div class='quotemain'>
Originally posted by jeepwranglerboi@Jan 27 2005, 03:34 PM
Originally posted by ebviking@Jan 27 2005, 11:33 PM
Originally posted by jeepwranglerboi@Jan 27 2005, 03:29 PM
Originally posted by ebviking@Jan 27 2005, 11:24 PM
<!--QuoteBegin-jeepwranglerboi
@Jan 27 2005, 03:22 PM
Great idea KinkGuy&#33; My best advice is just to relax as much as possible and go slow. I hate to suggest this but it may work, if you are of drinking age try a glass of wine. Vino gets me very physicaly warm as well as horny but it is also very relaxing to me. I hate to encourage anyone to try alcohol in order to take a large penis but it may help in easing up the process.  Best of luck&#33; :)
[post=278009]Quoted post[/post]​


How much wine should I bring then?
Was that two bottles or three??
[post=278010]Quoted post[/post]​

LOL I&#39;m not a lush&#33; Well, that depends... I can drink a bottle by myself but that gets me pretty tipsy. ;)
[post=278013]Quoted post[/post]​


Hot & nasty tipsy??
Like, tie you up with duct tape tipsy??
[post=278016]Quoted post[/post]​

Duct tape&#33; Ouch&#33;&#33;&#33; Now a silk rope on the other hand... ;)
[post=278017]Quoted post[/post]​

Hey, I&#39;ve got that too.
I was just trying to get a read on the tipsy scale.

I have to admit though, Having you tied and bound and in my control
is awfully erotic.
[post=278020]Quoted post[/post]​
[/b][/quote]
And very fun as well&#33; ;)
 

Kimahri

Cherished Member
Joined
Jan 4, 2005
Posts
1,258
Media
6
Likes
399
Points
303
Location
Bel Air (Maryland, United States)
Sexuality
90% Gay, 10% Straight
Gender
Male
Originally posted by jeepwranglerboi+Jan 28 2005, 01:02 PM--><div class='quotetop'>QUOTE(jeepwranglerboi &#064; Jan 28 2005, 01:02 PM)</div><div class='quotemain'>
Originally posted by ebviking@Jan 27 2005, 11:39 PM
Originally posted by jeepwranglerboi@Jan 27 2005, 03:34 PM
Originally posted by ebviking@Jan 27 2005, 11:33 PM
Originally posted by jeepwranglerboi@Jan 27 2005, 03:29 PM
Originally posted by ebviking@Jan 27 2005, 11:24 PM
<!--QuoteBegin-jeepwranglerboi
@Jan 27 2005, 03:22 PM
Great idea KinkGuy&#33; My best advice is just to relax as much as possible and go slow. I hate to suggest this but it may work, if you are of drinking age try a glass of wine. Vino gets me very physicaly warm as well as horny but it is also very relaxing to me. I hate to encourage anyone to try alcohol in order to take a large penis but it may help in easing up the process.  Best of luck&#33; :)
[post=278009]Quoted post[/post]​


How much wine should I bring then?
Was that two bottles or three??
[post=278010]Quoted post[/post]​

LOL I&#39;m not a lush&#33; Well, that depends... I can drink a bottle by myself but that gets me pretty tipsy. ;)
[post=278013]Quoted post[/post]​


Hot & nasty tipsy??
Like, tie you up with duct tape tipsy??
[post=278016]Quoted post[/post]​

Duct tape&#33; Ouch&#33;&#33;&#33; Now a silk rope on the other hand... ;)
[post=278017]Quoted post[/post]​


Hey, I&#39;ve got that too.
I was just trying to get a read on the tipsy scale.

I have to admit though, Having you tied and bound and in my control
is awfully erotic.
[post=278020]Quoted post[/post]​
And very fun as well&#33; ;)
[post=278239]Quoted post[/post]​
[/b][/quote]


DMW and JWB tied and helpless......oh man, I can&#39;t go standing up right now.
 

jeepwranglerboi

Experimental Member
Joined
Aug 4, 2004
Posts
800
Media
0
Likes
8
Points
238
Age
34
Location
Manhattan
Sexuality
99% Gay, 1% Straight
Gender
Male
Originally posted by Kimahri+Jan 28 2005, 05:04 PM--><div class='quotetop'>QUOTE(Kimahri &#064; Jan 28 2005, 05:04 PM)</div><div class='quotemain'>
Originally posted by jeepwranglerboi@Jan 28 2005, 01:02 PM
Originally posted by ebviking@Jan 27 2005, 11:39 PM
Originally posted by jeepwranglerboi@Jan 27 2005, 03:34 PM
Originally posted by ebviking@Jan 27 2005, 11:33 PM
Originally posted by jeepwranglerboi@Jan 27 2005, 03:29 PM
Originally posted by ebviking@Jan 27 2005, 11:24 PM
<!--QuoteBegin-jeepwranglerboi
@Jan 27 2005, 03:22 PM
Great idea KinkGuy&#33; My best advice is just to relax as much as possible and go slow. I hate to suggest this but it may work, if you are of drinking age try a glass of wine. Vino gets me very physicaly warm as well as horny but it is also very relaxing to me. I hate to encourage anyone to try alcohol in order to take a large penis but it may help in easing up the process.  Best of luck&#33; :)
[post=278009]Quoted post[/post]​


How much wine should I bring then?
Was that two bottles or three??
[post=278010]Quoted post[/post]​

LOL I&#39;m not a lush&#33; Well, that depends... I can drink a bottle by myself but that gets me pretty tipsy. ;)
[post=278013]Quoted post[/post]​


Hot & nasty tipsy??
Like, tie you up with duct tape tipsy??
[post=278016]Quoted post[/post]​

Duct tape&#33; Ouch&#33;&#33;&#33; Now a silk rope on the other hand... ;)
[post=278017]Quoted post[/post]​


Hey, I&#39;ve got that too.
I was just trying to get a read on the tipsy scale.

I have to admit though, Having you tied and bound and in my control
is awfully erotic.
[post=278020]Quoted post[/post]​

And very fun as well&#33; ;)
[post=278239]Quoted post[/post]​


DMW and JWB tied and helpless......oh man, I can&#39;t go standing up right now.
[post=278240]Quoted post[/post]​
[/b][/quote]
Well, in that case get on your knees&#33; ;)
 
1

13788

Guest
carolinacurious: smartguy,

Look through the older posts in this topic. From my relatively short time here I&#39;ve seen this question come up several times and while I don&#39;t disagree with the advice given here so far I know that in some of the older posts different types of advice was given.

Remember, if you really want to do it, you can. Don&#39;t get frustrated; you&#39;ve got a really thick one to deal with here. Also, another tip, some toys feel great and some toys (which seem fairly similar to the great ones) are intolerable.

carolina
 
1

13788

Guest
carolinacurious: ok, I did a little looking for you... (this pops up in the other topics as well)

http://www.lpsg.org/forum/index.php?showtopic=10123

http://www.lpsg.org/forum/index.php?showtopic=9817

go to this link:(same as appears a few lines down)

http://www.sexuality.org/l/incoming/analrule.html


some of my previous comments:

In the porn stories it&#39;s always "it hurt for a moment but then felt wonderful." I&#39;ve known a few people who claimed that this was the case but real life is seldom so kind. You both need to be prepared for the possibility that you may take your time, do everything right and still not be able at first. Lube between the legs can be handy if it comes to that. Patience and practice WILL pay off.

With a 6+" girth I don&#39;t really know what sort of "warm up" you&#39;re thinking of, just the head is going to be tough.

Personally, I had a really rough time at first but love it now.

http://www.sexuality.org/l/incoming/analrule.html

"When a finger, object or penis is intorduced into the anus, the anal muscles go into spasm, as if fighting off an invasion. Pain will result if the partners do not wait for these muscles to relax. Under sufficient stress they will eventually collapse and the pain subside, unless further damage is done. But, any &#39;pleasure&#39; afforded from this kind of activity derives mostly from the absence of discomfort.

Maximum anal pleasure requires the elimination of all pain or physical trauma from the anal experience. Self-protection on the part of the passive partner involves being ready to say "no" until he or she is ready to proceed. Readiness is a combination of physical relaxation, usually helped along by plenty of leisurely anal touching, and desire."

AND

Glad you liked the info. I thought of this, it may be obvious or it may have been in that link I sent, but the thing to remember is to push out. At first, everything is counterintuitive: you&#39;re trying to let him &#39;in&#39;, so why would you push &#39;out&#39;. Tightening up may seem like you are holding him in but in reality you will force him out and cause yourself instant spasms and lots of pain. The thing to remember will be to push out and when you get hit with a spasm get back to that &#39;push out&#39; mindset fast.

LATER, you will get into advanced techniques and use that muscle for his and your pleasure, but at first don&#39;t even think about it, just try to stay loose and relaxed.

There really is a lot to be said for a gentle anal massage until you open up, then partially inserting AND HOLDING STILL, this will cause your inner sphincter to relax, and then hopefully you&#39;ll be grabbing his ass and pulling him in.

There may be a totally different sort of pain with full insertion, for now it&#39;s a "Dr. It hurts when I do this situation."
 

jeepwranglerboi

Experimental Member
Joined
Aug 4, 2004
Posts
800
Media
0
Likes
8
Points
238
Age
34
Location
Manhattan
Sexuality
99% Gay, 1% Straight
Gender
Male
Originally posted by DoubleMeatWhopper+Jan 29 2005, 07:10 AM--><div class='quotetop'>QUOTE(DoubleMeatWhopper &#064; Jan 29 2005, 07:10 AM)</div><div class='quotemain'><!--QuoteBegin-Kimahri@Jan 28 2005, 05:04 PM
DMW and JWB tied and helpless......oh man, I can&#39;t go standing up right now.
[post=278240]Quoted post[/post]​

Wait just a minute ... How did I get mixed up in this? :eek: I didn&#39;t even get an invitation&#33;
[post=278465]Quoted post[/post]​
[/b][/quote]
You know that you always have an open invitation with me babe&#33; ;)
 

Kimahri

Cherished Member
Joined
Jan 4, 2005
Posts
1,258
Media
6
Likes
399
Points
303
Location
Bel Air (Maryland, United States)
Sexuality
90% Gay, 10% Straight
Gender
Male
Originally posted by jeepwranglerboi+Jan 29 2005, 04:01 PM--><div class='quotetop'>QUOTE(jeepwranglerboi &#064; Jan 29 2005, 04:01 PM)</div><div class='quotemain'>
Originally posted by DoubleMeatWhopper@Jan 29 2005, 07:10 AM
<!--QuoteBegin-Kimahri
@Jan 28 2005, 05:04 PM
DMW and JWB tied and helpless......oh man, I can&#39;t go standing up right now.
[post=278240]Quoted post[/post]​


Wait just a minute ... How did I get mixed up in this? :eek: I didn&#39;t even get an invitation&#33;
[post=278465]Quoted post[/post]​
You know that you always have an open invitation with me babe&#33; ;)
[post=278588]Quoted post[/post]​
[/b][/quote]


That&#39;s true, DMW, you do. :)