Virginity

SilverSoldier

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You know, I do want to add one thing.
Having sex for the first time on my wedding night was very scarey. But there were some perks.

We went all night long. After about the 4th time, I started getting the hang of it, and so did she, and so we would sleep for 20 minutes or so and then start over. I came 7 times that night. Not a record. I had a friend who came 11 times. But the point is, that wasn't great at first. It was awkward, embarrassing, and scarey. But then it became all right because we were SO concerned about the other person's enjoyment and pleasure that it really was all about love.

My second honeymoon was more erotic than the first. However, I only came twice. (23 years later, things change a bit.)

But my feeling is that for ME, it was the right thing for me personally to wait until I was married to have sex the first time. For others, I do not judge. It's an individual thing.

As for being worried about how many other virgins there are out there waiting for "you", stop worrying. Who cares if she's a virgin or not, except, are you like-minded, are you willing to work out marriage problems and differences, and is your right good enough to put her first when she needs to be first. I was never concerned about marrying another virgin. I was FAR more concerned about marrying someone who I loved deeply, who loved me the same, and that we could work out our problems.

I was married 23 years the first time. The marriage failed because of mental illness, and many other disasters. The second marriage only lasted 13 months. She was a hot former model who wasn't faithful, and who was also very ill. But as life goes on, regardless of what life brings to you, you can be thankful for the good things anyone brings to your life, regardless of how many years you may spend with them.

I am very glad to have been married and raised two great kids.
 

BigA

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My advice- be patient! The one you are waiting for will come to you!

How do you know? I have a friend who is now 30 i believe. he has gotten hookers in his weaker moments because of this blind faith that god has a plan for him and the one he is waiting for will come. lol

Just because it fell into place so perfectly for you, don't assume this will automatically happen for everybody.
 

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These guys who married at ages 19-21, and having families already, I'm not sure of the intricacies of their marriage, especially their sex lives, but I would be curious as to how happy they are and will be 10 years + down the line.

The one friend I am still very close to. He got married at 23, and his wife is the only woman he has had sex with, although they had pre-marital sex for about two years. At least they must know that they are compatible sexually. She had a couple partners before him, which he cares to just not think about. He loves his wife but he still thinks about other girls and sometimes wishes he had had more experiences when he had the chance.

I'm just adding what i know from my experience:cool:
 

joyboytoy79

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This is really quite simple:

If you want to have sex - DO!

If you don't want to have sex - DON'T!

If you vary from those two simple rules in any way, you are depriving yourself. Self deprivation is a big thing in a lot of churches, but it really isn't healthy (at least, not over long periods of time).

You're not less of a person for having sex outside of wedlock. You are also not less of a person for not having sex out of wedlock. It's really a PERSONAL decision, and you need to do what you, personally are comfortable with. The fact that you are asking other people (us) what our opinions are on your virginity is a little disturbing, because it tells me you haven't allowed yourself to make the decision for yourself. It's really something you need to figure out, and none of us can help you with that. At the same time, don't let your church decide for you either. It's on you, dude. You're wise enough to make your own choice.
 

D_Billy_Ballscrost

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The original poster is only 19, he is still quite young. The point I wanted to make, is wait until you are ready. And when you are, you will know it. Whether you marry that person you were with like I did, or it ends up being a one night stand- when you are ready to lose your virginity, you will know it.
 

D_Billy_Ballscrost

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How do you know? I have a friend who is now 30 i believe. he has gotten hookers in his weaker moments because of this blind faith that god has a plan for him and the one he is waiting for will come. lol

Just because it fell into place so perfectly for you, don't assume this will automatically happen for everybody.

I understand that this does not happen for everyone this way. I too have a friend who is 30, who is still a virgin, and still believes that he will find the "perfect" one for him to be with. I have another friend who gave his virginity to as he now calls her "the town whore". Losing one's virginity is a personal issue, and it depends on the person. I guess instead of "meeting the one", I should have said that you will know when you are ready. Whether you end up with that person for the rest of your life, or it is a one night stand, who knows? But when you are ready to lose your virginity, that is what matters.
 

chesz001

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if it is base in the bible,i agree that you are required to be a virgin before marriage..but in the real world it's not happening (for few maybe)..we all are virgins when born..but there are some things that you only realized after giving up your virginity like for example you both love each other deeper unlike when you didnt give it.(it's true)..unless you're a player,you wouldnt mind it..but girls think twice or a million times..is he worth it??that's just it..
 

sleepiboi

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I'm a virgin too so no need to worry. I am just nervice about it because I think my size it too small and too nervice to engage in sexual activity, but that's just me :rolleyes: that is why I haven't done it. I've had plenty of offers but never take because of that
 

jeff black

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I'm a virgin too so no need to worry. I am just nervice about it because I think my size it too small and too nervice to engage in sexual activity, but that's just me :rolleyes: that is why I haven't done it. I've had plenty of offers but never take because of that

I dont' see a worry with being a virgin. I know people who are still virgins. We were all virgins once. Size only matters if you let it.:smile:
 

B_NineInchCock_160IQ

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Your virginity is precious- it is special

It's special? Hate to break this to you, but everybody's a virgin at least once in thier life.

I do agree, however, with whomever simplified this by saying if you want to have sex, do, and if you don't want to, then don't. Good simple answer only complicated by the fact that sometimes it's difficult to figure out what you really want.
 

rob_just_rob

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How do you know? I have a friend who is now 30 i believe. he has gotten hookers in his weaker moments because of this blind faith that god has a plan for him and the one he is waiting for will come. lol

Just because it fell into place so perfectly for you, don't assume this will automatically happen for everybody.

Exactly.

You have to make your own "plan", and not wait for it to just fall into place.
 

stretcher74

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It's special? Hate to break this to you, but everybody's a virgin at least once in thier life.

I do agree, however, with whomever simplified this by saying if you want to have sex, do, and if you don't want to, then don't. Good simple answer only complicated by the fact that sometimes it's difficult to figure out what you really want.

Read the thread and agree with everything NIC_160 has said.

I lost my virginity at 20 and if could I go back I'd do it at 16.

Personally, I was miserable as a virgin. Tied into a maddona/whore complex from my very traditional christian upbringing it did a number on my self-confidence.

Men generally like to have sex. If you have this feeling and want to, go have (safer) sex. If not, don't. Read up on it. You'll do great.

Women who are virgins are an even bigger pain in the ass IMHO.
 
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Practical reasons:
• STDs. And condoms aren't a surefire answer. (I've remained clean through many bloodfights though)
• Pregnancy, no real answer. (had people I don't even know demanding my baby)
• Accommodating partners,.. not just size but the almost insatiable force and duration. Probably won't be an answer I want to hear.

Pragmatic reason:
• Virginity is the last thing keeping me from the devil's temptations.



Anyone feel my reasons unjustified, or can help resolve them?
 

chesz001

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I'm a virgin too so no need to worry. I am just nervice about it because I think my size it too small and too nervice to engage in sexual activity, but that's just me :rolleyes: that is why I haven't done it. I've had plenty of offers but never take because of that



Why worry about the size?some girls don't mind that..unless they're sex maniacs.LOL..try doin it in a virgin,i'm pretty sure she's also that curious and wouldn't mind that..and trust me..the first time you enter to her..HELL.!YOU'LL LOVE IT!!and keep on doin it..now,it made me remember the first time i did it..:biggrin1:
 

insert_8

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My wife and I exchanged virginity (she took mine, and I got hers in return) on our wedding night. We were both 23. Probably the lousiest sex we've ever had - and one of the most significant and meaningful events in both our lives.