Virtual sex vs. physical sex with a partner

[Wave85]

There have always been times when I have needed to masturbate - whether I was single or in a committed relationship. Once upon a time, I would use magazines or porn or just my own mental fantasy to get me turned on. Now there are so many ways including ways offered by sites like LPSG to get turned on that feel one step closer to real life because they are interactive - you have what feels like some semblance of a relationship with the avatar you are interacting with even if you know nothing or little about them and even if you are just visiting their galleries. I am not talking about actual hook-ups. When the interaction is through a computer, you honestly don't have any way of knowing whether you are interacting with a person or a "bot," you just know it is helping you get turned on. So is there anything wrong with that kind of interaction? Are you being unfaithful to a real world partner if you are fantasizing in an interactive way instead of merely in your own head or by watching or looking at something that turns you on?

 

[rtg]

If you are actually talking to someone with the intent of getting off from it then this is a form of cheating imo. Or even if you talk to someone and it heads down that path. I expect my partner to be 100% loyal to me and even if he hasn't done anything physical with someone else, it would still hurt me. I know some people will think differently and some wouldn't care, but just sharing how I would react to it.

For me, if someone is doing that then it makes me think that it probably wouldn't be too much of a stretch for them to take it to the next stage.

I don't think that watching porn is a big deal though. I'd rather service him myself though or watch it together. The key issues for me would be in thinking "does he prefer a woman who looks like that?" As opppsed to the actual act of watching porn.

 

[Wave85]

If you are actually talking to someone with the intent of getting off from it then this is a form of cheating imo. Or even if you talk to someone and it heads down that path. I expect my partner to be 100% loyal to me and even if he hasn't done anything physical with someone else, it would still hurt me. I know some people will think differently and some wouldn't care, but just sharing how I would react to it.

For me, if someone is doing that then it makes me think that it probably wouldn't be too much of a stretch for them to take it to the next stage.

I don't think that watching porn is a big deal though. I'd rather service him myself though or watch it together. The key issues for me would be in thinking "does he prefer a woman who looks like that?" As opppsed to the actual act of watching porn.

Always like and respect your opinion @rtg!

 

[rtg]

Always like and respect your opinion @rtg!

Thanks I don't get too many men here telling me that haha so I appreciate it.

 

[Wave85]

Thanks I don't get too many men here telling me that haha so I appreciate it.

@rtg - you and a small group of others are the only reason I stay on the site

 

[rtg]

@rtg - you and a small group of others are the only reason I stay on the site

Aw shucks

 

[deleted924715]

This scenario came up for me recently and I realised I am nowhere near as cool about this as I expected I would be. I agree with @rtg - it feels like being cheated on to some extent.

I don't care about him watching porn, or looking at galleries, or commenting online in forums etc. It's the interactive nature of some things that crosses the line for me.

I don't care if he looks at a woman's photos and gets turned on, but I do care if he 'loves' the pics or leaves comments on them. That crosses a line for me, that he is initiating contact - he wants her to know that he saw it and liked it/was aroused and lets face it - is hoping she will respond. Non-sexual wall messages? Don't care. Private messages on a site like this? Nope. Watching a vid of a woman masturbating? Don't care. Doing it in a private chat, like you get here? Masturbating for her? Nah. I don't think so. IMO it's disrespectful if a partner isn't aware.

I think this is one of those questions where the answers will depend on how much the respondents themselves indulge and which party they identify with

 

[Wave85]

This scenario came up for me recently and I realised I am nowhere near as cool about this as I expected I would be. I agree with @rtg - it feels like being cheated on to some extent.

I don't care about him watching porn, or looking at galleries, or commenting online in forums etc. It's the interactive nature of some things that crosses the line for me.

I don't care if he looks at a woman's photos and gets turned on, but I do care if he 'loves' the pics or leaves comments on them. That crosses a line for me, that he is initiating contact - he wants her to know that he saw it and liked it/was aroused and lets face it - is hoping she will respond. Non-sexual wall messages? Don't care. Private messages on a site like this? Nope. Watching a vid of a woman masturbating? Don't care. Doing it in a private chat, like you get here? Masturbating for her? Nah. I don't think so. IMO it's disrespectful if a partner isn't aware.

I think this is one of those questions where the answers will depend on how much the respondents themselves indulge and which party they identify with

I am definitely guilty of that @BacknForth - I appreciate your opinion! I wonder what it will be like for our kids when you can't distinguish between a person and a bot... people will still find themselves alone and needing a masturbation release - it won't be a Playboy/playgirl magazine in a bathroom like when I was young(er)

 

[deleted924715]

I am definitely guilty of that @BacknForth - I appreciate your opinion! I wonder what it will be like for our kids when you can't distinguish between a person and a bot... people will still find themselves alone and needing a masturbation release - it won't be a Playboy/playgirl magazine in a bathroom like when I was young(er)

Ahhhhh. Well I guess that probably wasn't the answer you wanted then lol.

You seem like a decent guy, just... be careful. It's pretty easy to get emotionally entangled with someone online, no matter what you tell yourself. I would be hurt and suspicious if I was your partner and I somehow found out what you were up to. I don't know if it's that women are wicked intuitive or men are wicked obvious - but we usually do find out.

Some partners I have told I am here, some I haven't BUT my personal policy is not to post anything I wouldn't post if they were reading over my shoulder. I'm sure others have different views and at the end of the day, you're a grown man and can do what you want

 

[693987]

This scenario came up for me recently and I realised I am nowhere near as cool about this as I expected I would be. I agree with @rtg - it feels like being cheated on to some extent.

I don't care about him watching porn, or looking at galleries, or commenting online in forums etc. It's the interactive nature of some things that crosses the line for me.

I don't care if he looks at a woman's photos and gets turned on, but I do care if he 'loves' the pics or leaves comments on them. That crosses a line for me, that he is initiating contact - he wants her to know that he saw it and liked it/was aroused and lets face it - is hoping she will respond. Non-sexual wall messages? Don't care. Private messages on a site like this? Nope. Watching a vid of a woman masturbating? Don't care. Doing it in a private chat, like you get here? Masturbating for her? Nah. I don't think so. IMO it's disrespectful if a partner isn't aware.

I think this is one of those questions where the answers will depend on how much the respondents themselves indulge and which party they identify with

Pretty much everything she said goes for me too. Saves me writing a long response

 

[Wave85]

Ahhhhh. Well I guess that probably wasn't the answer you wanted then lol.

You seem like a decent guy, just... be careful. It's pretty easy to get emotionally entangled with someone online, no matter what you tell yourself. I would be hurt and suspicious if I was your partner and I somehow found out what you were up to. I don't know if it's that women are wicked intuitive or men are wicked obvious - but we usually do find out.

Some partners I have told I am here, some I haven't BUT my personal policy is not to post anything I wouldn't post if they were reading over my shoulder. I'm sure others have different views and at the end of the day, you're a grown man and can do what you want

@BacknForth - lol - I don't have an answer that I am looking for - I hear and appreciate everything you have said - I am happy to take a critical eye to myself. I learn from you @rtg and @Fade and whoever responds to my comments and posts. Having come here accidentally when I was searching for comfortable underwear on google *scratches and shakes head* - I have learned a lot about myself in an unexpected way - some good and some not so good - glad for both learning. Yes women are incredibly intuitive and men can be incredibly obvious.

 

[lapdog2001]

I don't care if he looks at a woman's photos and gets turned on, but I do care if he 'loves' the pics or leaves comments on them. That crosses a line for me, that he is initiating contact - he wants her to know that he saw it and liked it/was aroused and lets face it - is hoping she will respond.

I click the 'love' button on many pictures, and even leave comments, but to me it is just flirtatious behavior as I'm not interacting beyond the comments.

Non-sexual wall messages? Don't care. Private messages on a site like this? Nope. Watching a vid of a woman masturbating? Don't care. Doing it in a private chat, like you get here? Masturbating for her? Nah. I don't think so. IMO it's disrespectful if a partner isn't aware.

I get messages on here asking about chat and other interactive contact methods, but here on LPSG, I'm strictly a post in public kind of guy.
I don't do private anything online, as that would cross the line for me.