Weird Expeience/feeling

Discussion in 'Relationships, Discrimination, and Jealousy' started by tillyrox, Aug 28, 2005.

  1. tillyrox

    tillyrox New Member

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    Hey Guys
    I had this really weird feeling tonight, when i was talking to an ex. You need the back story first, lol. A few months ago, after the big breakup with my ex i had this fling with a guy i met at a club who was only in hobart for the weekend, and well we met the friday night and spent the whole weekend in his hotel room, until he left monday morning, we have been in touch on msn since. I admit i did really like him in the short time we spent together but because of distance decided that nothing could happen. Anywhoo, tonight i was talking to him and he said he was going on a date, and i had this really weird feeling that im ashamed of. I sort of felt a mixture of sadness and jealousy, but also a sort of anger that he could be happy with someone else. Im happy with my bf now and it really shocked me that i felt like this about a guy i met for a weekend.

    What i wanted to know is if this is a normal feeling or am i totally crazy, lol.

    Luv Ya's
    Tilly
     
  2. Knight

    Knight New Member

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    Females are 'programmed' to become attached to guys they have sex with. It would be difficult to bypass that, a lot of girls feel that way. And guys too but it's not as common.
     
  3. Dr. Dilznick

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    My ex is like that; she can't detach sex from emotion. It's gotten to the point where I have her come over whenever I feel like it.

    I must have made quite an impression.
     
  4. headbang8

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    Mixed emotions? ALWAYS normal. If they were simple, straightforward emotions, they wouldn't help you grow. Revel in them.

    Remember, though, that men tend to take you at your word on emotional matters. So if you didn't negotiate fidelity, don't think him a cad if he doesn't hold to it.

    hb8

    P.S. Good to see that Tasmanians are so, er, hospitable to strangers. It helps the gene pool. (just kidding)
     
  5. tillyrox

    tillyrox New Member

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    Thanks Guys you are really helpfull, im ok now, it was just the shock of it i think, we were never really an item because of the distance thing but would have been if we lived closer together, it was just a weird feeling that i havent felt before. so thanks.

    and as far as that goes, tasmanians are very hospitable, lol, and we are not all two headed monsters who are all imbred like some would think. LOL

    Luv Ya's
    Tilly
     
  6. steve319

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    Tilly, sounds like you're just human to me. I think it's natural to have those feelings--and natural to be blindsided by them too.

    And I'm living proof that it's not just a female thing. I am totally a believer that sex can be just sex, with no emotional entanglements, but in practice, I'm not so good at keeping them separate all the time.

    We can all be surprised by unexpected feelings that way. I think we come to a better understanding of ourselves at those moments.

    Glad you're managing it OK. :hi:
     
  7. Alley Blue

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    I agree with Steve. When I first read your post Tilly, I thought "there's nothing abnormal about that".

    You had an attachment, even though for only a short period of time, it was still an attachment. Perhaps you were simply feeling the "remnants" of that attachment.......of your moments together.
     
  8. lapdog2001

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    Tilly,

    I agree with the others and will say it is perfectly normal to feel something! I think most guys would also 'feel something' if they spent an entire weekend in a hotel room with a woman like you, even if going in you both knew it was going to be very short term.

    Physical intimacy can lead to emotional attachment, even if that is not what you are looking for. You have a good man now, and know it, but that doesn't mean you can't have fond memories or a little jealousy for a weekend fling.

    LapDog :p
     
  9. Dorset

    Dorset New Member

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    Wow, just read this post for the first time.

    You get this wierd feeling and then get engaged to your boyfriend 2 days later!

    I assume your boyfriend doesn't know about that weekend?

    I don't want to preach but I know from personal experience that these things have a way of coming out eventually - some times even years later.

    If your fiancee doesn't know about this and finds out you're in real trouble. Just because you'd had a fight most partners would still be incredibly hurt that you slept with someone else
     
  10. lapdog2001

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    Dorset,

    I think you are missunderstanding what Till was saying. She broke up with boyfriend X, then had a great weekend with fling Y. She has kept in touch with Y, even while starting a romantic relationship with a long time friend Z. There was no cheating here.
    I believe Z knows all about X and Y.


    Did I get it right Tilly?
    LapDog :p
     
  11. tillyrox

    tillyrox New Member

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    Yeah thats right Lapdog

    There was no cheating at all going on, i had just had a messy break up with "x" lol, and the guy i had a fling with was just a one off one weekend thing, but we stayed in touch, then my current bf, who was my best friend knows about it all.

    So Yeah
    Luv Ya
    Tilly
     
  12. Dorset

    Dorset New Member

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    Lol, thanks for clearing that up, makes my lovelife seem quite straight forward
     
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