what becomes of the broken hearted

Discussion in 'Women's Issues' started by Imported, Dec 18, 2004.

  1. Imported

    Gold Member

    Jan 1, 2000
    Likes Received:
    Captin_hung: Hi i had been going out with this chick for about 3 months but before that we where best friends for about 2 years because of this i found it easy to fall completely head over heels in love with her and i did. but as the title of this tpoic suggests she broke up with me she had talked to me a few days before and told me i was doing things that made her unhappy like i got too close and when she pushed me away i got kinda sad cause it hurt, so i decided to change myself i worked hard on not doing the things she had said i did my best to make her happy but she still dumped me and i dont want to let her go i love her far to much so please give me some advice and please dont say i should just let her go because i cant you see ive had a very unhappy life i had never felt true happiness till i stared going out with her.
    ok i think in order to Get good advice i should mabey give some info on me and her she is quite emotionally distant and hardly ever shows emotion so i find it hard to tell whats happening so i dont know when to back off she also says she get claustriphobic (if thats how its spelt) when i get close to her and i dont know how to get passed this she is a very attractive woman and constantly has guys hitting on her, as for me well ive been compared to shrek so im not that great looking and my whole life no woman has ever wanted me so ive been deprived of any real physical contact

    thank you for any advice that you may be able to give me.
  2. naughty

    Gold Member

    May 21, 2004
    Likes Received:
    Workin' up a good pot of mad!

    First, I would like to say that I am so sorry that you are going through this. Caring for someone and not having your feelings returned is a hurting thing. I think you need to step back from the situation. Summon all of your self discipline and dont call her, dont approach and dont plead with her. As crazy as it sounds most people appreciate that which they have to work hard to attain. There is a thin line between love and hate.Dont grovel because once someone has lost respect for you they lose any inclinations towards loving. For some reason, things hard won seem to have much more intrinsic value . People can be mean and hurtful. Dont let this particular rejection spiral you into a depression. I also think you would do well to get the new book "He just isnt into you". I have heard it can apply to both sexes. The bottom line is that you dont want someone who doesnt want you. I am sure you have qualities that some woman will value and cherish you for. Talk with a good friend and ask for a honest and candid evaluation of your actions. But please do not continue to pursue her .Let her miss your company. Hang in there. They say that every pot has a lid. :)

  3. Pecker

    Pecker Retired Moderator
    Gold Member

    Mar 5, 2002
    Likes Received:
    Good relationships don't come from having to beat her over the head with your feelings to get her attention. That only happens in movies.

    You must be Catholic - just as you might feel that bad things happen to you because you've done something wrong to deserve it, you think it's your fault she doesn't like you.


    Save your love for the one who's willing to be a good fit for you without having to use a shoehorn.

    You'll both be a lot happier for a lot longer.
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