What constitutes 'Sleeping around'?

[D_Kay_Sarah_Sarah]

A friend of mine is in a committed long term relationship (unmarried) and has 3 children with her partner. She has NOT had intercourse with another man but over during there relationship she has given 2 different men oral sex on numerous occasions.

In my eyes that constitutes cheating/sleeping around but her 'loop hole' is there hasn't been penetrative sex so technically she isn't sleeping around, so it isn't as bad.

She has confided this i me and i have NO intentions of betraying her to tell her partner but i am interested in knowing what you deem 'Sleeping around'?

 

[Drifterwood]

Certainly not what she does Lee. Sounds to me that she just likes to keep a little sexual danger in her life and acknowledges that she still finds other guys attractive and likes being attractive to them.

If she has made the decision not to be married, then she is probably being honest with herself.

I think sleeping around needs to be a bit more indiscriminate.

 

[Curious Gal]

It is called oral SEX for a reason. Anything that could genuinely hurt someone I regard as "sleeping around". Things like text messages are halfway there.

But then again, I am as loyal as an old cattle dog which is probably why I have the views that I do...

 

[AlteredEgo]

If she can't tell her partnerr about it because her partner wouldn't approve, then she's cheating.

 

[Love-it]

Monica's curse, or is it Bill's? It is sex and it is cheating.

 

[Drifterwood]

I think we all agree that she is "cheating" on her partner to some degree dependent upon your morality, but the question was whether she is sleeping around by having two buddies with oral benefits.

 

[B_ScaredLittleBoy]

I think that's a bit slutty. Not into girls who go round sucking random guys off.

If you suck someone off, you should let them fuck you too :tongue:

I'm serious. On both counts.

She should also be honest with her husband or do him a favour and break up with her and go do bukkake films

 

[conchis]

a girlfriend once told me that oral sex is more intimate than fuck

 

[IntoxicatingToxin]

Well, I consider that cheating. It's called "Oral SEX" for a reason. (You took the words out of my mouth, Curious Gal!)

Does she make them wear a condom? Or is she totally putting herself and her partner at risk as well?

 

[B_Jennuine73]

Sleeping around is having more than one partner, in my opinion.

 

[Osiris]

I would have to say it is cheating. If you can't tell your partner, it's cheating.

There are a lot of woman I would love to experience oral with, but I could not do that to my wife. It's completely disrespectful.

Looking in the candy store window is one thing. Sampling the goods in any form is out of line. If I lick the lollipop once, I can put it back and not buy it, right?

Nope!

 

[B_Italian1]

a girlfriend once told me that oral sex is more intimate than fuck

Of course it is. Your mouth is on someone's genitals. You can't get any more intimate than that. It used to be that you had intercourse first and oral later.

She has NOT had intercourse with another man but over during there relationship she has given 2 different men oral sex on numerous occasions.

In my eyes that constitutes cheating/sleeping around but her 'loop hole' is there hasn't been penetrative sex so technically she isn't sleeping around, so it isn't as bad.

She's trying to make an excuse for her bad behavior. Her mouth was penetrated by a penis, so she did cheat. I don't think she'd be okay with it if her partner went down on two different women or if two different women went down on him. You should ask her if she’d be cool with that. I think I know what her answer would be.

 

[Captain Elephant]

Well, it depends on what the definition of "is" is.

 

[Act2_Begins_Now]

a girlfriend once told me that oral sex is more intimate than fuck

I agree completely. I am willing to bet her husband feels that way as well.

 

[SpoiledPrincess]

Anything that's got sex in the title whether it's penetrative or not is cheating. I also think that if it's something you wouldn't tell your partner then it's cheating. This also for me extends to cyber sex and camming, if you're going to do it and your partner knows I don't consider it cheating, it's not really involving and it's more or less interactive porn, nevertheless you should tell your partner.

 

[ClaireTalon]

I would not call oral sex with two other guys "sleeping around". Sleeping around is in my eyes if she has a greater number of sexual relationships with other guys. However, in my eyes this can be called as cheating.

I consider myself as more liberal in the sexual ways, and I admit I have not always been a good girl, but you don't sleep with other guys when you're in an obviously very committed relationship (unless her kids were results of bad contraceptive use), nor do you suck them off. I think playful flirting is okay, but you don't put those words into action when you're in a committed, and that's that.

 

[SpoiledPrincess]

Some men dislike their gf's flirting, but I don't see flirting as having any real sexual intent behind it, it's just playful banter. I've not always been a good girl but I have always been faithful apart from one almost incident over the course of a 21 year marriage. If you're in a relationship you should put 100% into that.

 

[B_Monster]

If you betray the trust of your partner, then your cheating!

 

[ClaireTalon]

Some men dislike their gf's flirting, but I don't see flirting as having any real sexual intent behind it, it's just playful banter. I've not always been a good girl but I have always been faithful apart from one almost incident over the course of a 21 year marriage. If you're in a relationship you should put 100% into that.

LOL, then you have a better record than I do, but we share the opinion on flirting. I do have a flirty personality sometimes, and forbidding me to act on it won't be successful. But when I'm with a man I can assure him that all the flirting that is not directed to him is only words, and nothing else.

If you betray the trust of your partner, then your cheating!

You name it!

 

[SpoiledPrincess]

It was more luck than anything that I wasn't unfaithful, although I believe in fidelity I'm as easily tempted as anyone, it was mainly down to being a mum and not going out as often as I had, I had unlimited sex at home if I wanted it, so when I went out with my friends I wanted to dance and let my hair down not straddle some random guy