I think I've made it rather obvious ... I'm at least semi bi. But it's not something I can readily define or understand about myself, but it's some thing I sincerely feel the need to figure out. The thing is, I bring the subject to light, I have no idea how to properly address it, how to talk about it. I don't know if I'm afraid or nervous or what. I mean ... OK, I have Kris ... and she's, she's my world. I can't live, can't be without her, seriously ... her love is so warm and wonderful and just something I could never be without. So having someone like that, I guess I ask myself, why do I wish for anything else? But ... I don't even think thats the best way to put it. Goddammit I'm rambling .... It's not that I care about being 'out', it's not that I care what people think of my choice. The problem is, there are sexual fantasies I have involving guys ... but I've only ever found certain guys remotely attractive. That and emotionally, psychologically, Kris gives me all the support and strength I could ever need ... but I wouldn't want to leave anyone I shared a bed with emotionally out in the cold ... Is anyone seeing how this is exasperating to me? I guess I just want help ... advice ... something ... some understanding of what I should do ... what is going on inside me, what it means. I understand it but I don't, for whatever sense that makes.