That was beautiful, and actually brought tears to my eyes. I've never read a man's feelings so clearly and concisely worded.
I left this board for a while because I thought I had found just that. A man with whom I shared interests, friends, future goals and aspirations. We met and it was like lightning flashed between our eyes, some instant recognition. When he looked down at me, smiling, I felt actual warmth radiate through my body. We talked for hours into the night, like old friends, but the sex also was fantastic! Quite a rare combination to find. Mutual respect, similar sense of humour, tenderness...I could have loved him so easily...
But just because of those things, because we got along so well, because I looked at him with adoration and respect, because I made the choice to hope for a life together and open my heart to him, he took all the kindness he'd previously flooded me with...and withdrew it.
You see, he has dated only girls with whom he shared mild conversation, passing interest, and physical attraction. He's met only one other woman with whom he could talk and laugh without noticing time pass, and she is a close friend. To have found that in me, he recognizes only friendship. He thinks there is no possibility for a relationship together, since it's so different from what he's known. He's afraid of being hurt, and afraid of hurting me.
And so, I go on with my life alone, hoping someday to rekindle what was lost. I thought I knew quite well what men wanted from women: respect, honesty, intellect, joy, mutual effort in communication and understanding, grace, beauty, dedication, strength, adoration, love, tenderness...but this has shaken me to my core. I gave him all of that, and because of it, he turned away.