What do you do when you don't drink

IntactMale

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I recently moved to a new city and I don't know anyone here. I'm trying not to drink for a number of reasons but I feel like this hinders my ability to socialize, also for a number of reasons. Drinking has been a part of my life for such a long time that I don't really know what to do without it.

What kind of things do you do to get out and socialize that don't involve drinking?
 
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Seek solitude by jerking off to you guys
 

Tight_N_Juicy

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I got nuthin, really. When I drink, I drink at home, I'm not much of a social butterfly.

Around here rock climbing is a pretty popular hobby... Off roading too, outside stuff. There are a few groups of people who regularly go find spots in the desert to just cruise, and climb... Maybe something like that?
 
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Thanks. All the singles events in my area, which I feel embarrassed to go to in the first place, seem to have at least some relation to alcohol. It's bad enough to go to that type of event, but to be the guy there drinking water is even worse.
 
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NCbear

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You could go to the social events and drink club soda, which can look like a mixed drink.

You could also join Meetup groups and enjoy different kinds of outings, as a previous poster—Tight_N_Juicy—said above.

There’s also the tried-and-true method of simply talking to lots of people and learning from them what social options are out there for open-air community events or film festivals, farmers markets, and so forth where you can enjoy being around other people.

What city?

NCbear (who’s been in your shoes several times in my life)
 

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Marijuana?

I don't get out much. So I can't answer.

I was gonna say that, but then I realized that unless you're in a recreational state, finding bud in a new community might not be so easy.

I'm sure I'd find a way tho. :rolleyes:
 
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I rarely drink when I go out, I just drink soda and lime. I also just go out for dinner, coffee, cooking classes, old bookstores, lectures, volunteer on boards, etc. I will say volunteering is a great way to meet people with similar passions to yours, and there’s usually coffee after.

My boy goes rock climbing and has met a ton of people that way. He just started going to a place in the city and got good at it. Bonus - he’s built like a rock wall himself, too. Muscles in his fingers.

Salsa dancing is big here, too. You don’t have to drink. Again, have a soda. Lots of people need partners. Always a class first before the real dancing starts. I know some super cool people who are really into it. And look at the popularity of Dancing with the Stars and So You Think You Can Dance. People are really getting into dance, especially young people.

Just my two cents.
 

palakaorion

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All the singles events in my area, which I feel embarrassed to go to in the first place, seem to have at least some relation to alcohol
There's two things at play here.
2. Pressure (actual or perceived) to drink when you don't care to.
1. You're already uncomfortable at these events.

This doesn't seem like a recipe for success.

If you don't care to drink, don't drink. Enjoy your non-alcohol beverages and be social. Don't make a big deal out of not drinking, and chances are nobody else will either. (I don't drink either.) But don't be BuzzKillDude.

The bigger deal here is that you're not comfortable at "singles events." So don't attend them. Strike up conversations with other people while you're doing stuff that you *do* enjoy. It will come up that you're single and looking. Chances are someone knows someone. Good old fashioned social networking in meatspace, not cyberspace.
 
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I’d probably join a penis forum and try to make friends there :blush:

But seriously, hobbies and volunteering are good suggestions. If you work, maybe there are workplace related activities? I’ve worked in places with informal groups that meet to play badminton, soccer etc, as well as photography clubs and things.

I generally prefer online interactions though and have made a lot of good friends that way.
 
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My advice would differ depending on your reasons for not wanting to drink.
Drink problem? Stay away from social situations involving alcohol for now, and find other things to do, and find people whose lives don't revolve around alcohol. They do exist.
 

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You could go to the social events and drink club soda, which can look like a mixed drink.

You could also join Meetup groups and enjoy different kinds of outings, as a previous poster—Tight_N_Juicy—said above.

There’s also the tried-and-true method of simply talking to lots of people and learning from them what social options are out there for open-air community events or film festivals, farmers markets, and so forth where you can enjoy being around other people.

What city?

NCbear (who’s been in your shoes several times in my life)

I'm in Asheville NC, kind of near you. It's a cool town with lots to do, but I'm too old to be hanging out with the younger crowd, and I'm trying to avoid drinking (Asheville probably isn't the place for that) so I'm not sure what to do.

If I could talk to people this probably wouldn't be a problem. I have a lot of social anxiety, and I'm from a place where people usually keep to themselves, so that's what I'm used to.
 

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I was gonna say that, but then I realized that unless you're in a recreational state, finding bud in a new community might not be so easy.

I'm sure I'd find a way tho. :rolleyes:

I'm in Asheville NC, recreational use isn't legal here, but no one is stopping it, and its very easy to find someone who has some. Getting it isn't a problem here. But that also hasn't been a social thing for me in a long time. I use it rarely, haven't smoked in a year and a half even though I have some. But its a solo activity for me.
 
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IntactMale

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You could try spending time in independent coffee houses. (i.e. - non-Starbucks).

This is a great idea. The only problem is that I don't drink coffee, or any caffeine really. I quickly start looking like a creep in those places, I think.
 

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In Asheville...there is nothing to do that doesn't involve alcohol in one form or another. I stay at home usually...watch Netflix..and go out to see bands play occasionally. There's Facebook groups that seem to cater to finding things to do in Asheville.