What Good Have North Americans Done ??

Discussion in 'Funny Stuff: Jokes, Quizzes, Games & Pics' started by jakeatolla, Mar 3, 2009.

  1. jakeatolla

    Gold Member

    Joined:
    May 22, 2004
    Messages:
    3,093
    Albums:
    1
    Likes Received:
    10
    Gender:
    Male
    Location:
    Canada
    You could have heard a pin drop.....


    In
    England, at a fairly large conference, Colin Powell was asked by the Archbishop of Canterbury if our plans for Iraq were just an example of empire building' by the United States. He answered by saying, 'Over the years, the United States has sent many of its fine young men and women into great peril to fight for freedom beyond our borders. The only amount of land we have ever asked for in return is enough to bury those that did not return.'

    You could have heard a pin drop.



    There was a conference in France where a number of international engineers were taking part, including French and American. During a break, one of the French engineers came back into the room saying 'Have you heard the latest dumb stunt the United States has has done?? They have sent an aircraft carrier to Indonesia to help the tsunami victims. What do they intend to do, bomb them?'
    A Boeing engineer stood up and replied quietly: 'Our carriers have three hospitals on board that can treat several hundred people; they are nuclear powered and can supply emergency electrical power to shore facilities; they have three cafeterias with the capacity to feed 3,000 people three meals a day, they can produce several thousand gallons of fresh water from sea water each day, and they carry half a dozen helicopters for use in transporting victims and injured to and from their flight deck. We have eleven such ships; how many does
    France have?'

    You could have heard a pin drop.



    A Canadian Admiral was attending a naval conference that included Admirals from the Canadian, U.S., English, Australian and French Navys. At a cocktail reception, he found himself standing with a large group of
    officers that included personnel from most of those countries.
    Everyone was chatting away in English as they sipped their drinks but a French admiral suddenly complained that, whereas Europeans learn many languages, North Americans generally learn only English.' He then asked, 'Why is it that we always have to speak English in these conferences rather than speaking French?' Without hesitating, the Admiral replied 'Maybe it's because the Brits, Canadians, Aussies and Americans arranged it so you wouldn't have to speak German.'

    You could have heard a pin drop.


    AND THIS STORY FITS RIGHT IN WITH THE ABOVE...

    Robert Whiting, an elderly Canadian gentleman of 83, arrived in
    Paris by plane. At French Customs, he took a few minutes to locate his passport in his carry on.
    'You have been to
    France before, monsieur?' the customs officer asked
    sarcastically.
    Mr. Whiting admitted that he had been to
    France previously
    Then you should know enough to have your passport ready.'
    The Canadian said, ''The last time I was here, I didn't have to show it.
    'Impossible. Canadians always have to show passports on arrival in
    France!'
    The Canadian senior gave the Frenchman a long hard look. Then he quietly explained, ''Well, when I came ashore on D-Day in 1944 to help liberate this country, I couldn't find a single Frenchmen to show a passport to.'

    You could have heard a pin drop.
     
  2. travis7

    travis7 Active Member

    Joined:
    Mar 27, 2012
    Messages:
    399
    Albums:
    1
    Likes Received:
    186
    Gender:
    Male
    Location:
    Texas
    Awesome jake
     
  3. bigboy9239

    Gold Member

    Joined:
    May 3, 2006
    Messages:
    7,569
    Albums:
    1
    Likes Received:
    159
    Gender:
    Male
    Location:
    In the City close to NJ and Delaware
    Hey Jake...thanks.....and considering I have many relatives in Canada......I consider my self part Canadian.
     
  4. ronin001

    Gold Member

    Joined:
    May 16, 2009
    Messages:
    4,766
    Albums:
    5
    Likes Received:
    29,401
    Gender:
    Male
    Location:
    New York (NY, US)
    Awsum just Awsum
     
  5. MASSIVEPKGO_CHUCK

    MASSIVEPKGO_CHUCK Well-Known Member

    Joined:
    Aug 9, 2003
    Messages:
    28,022
    Likes Received:
    731
    Gender:
    Male
    Location:
    the pain behind your eyes
    You're gettin' almost as crazy as I am, you know that?
     
Draft saved Draft deleted