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What Is My Sexuality

Discussion in 'Relationships, Discrimination, and Jealousy' started by hotdog7, May 7, 2020.

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What is my sexuality?

  1. Straight

    5.7%
  2. Gay

    26.4%
  3. Bi

    58.5%
  4. Something else

    20.8%
Multiple votes are allowed.
  1. hotdog7

    Gold Member Verified

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    Hey there. I am 22 from Germany male. As this is my first post you can move it if I am wrong.

    As the topic already says I am asking me this question long time: "What is my sexuality?"

    The problem is that I cannot say that I am into girls or I into boys or that I am into both. On every gender there are some parts of the body what I like (in a sexual sense) and what I don't like.

    Rank the sexual parts (in brackets my sexual attraction from 1 (least) to 10 (most so that you can get the difference between them):
    1. Male Penis (10)
    2. Female Ass (9)
    3. Female breast (7)
    4. Female vagina (5)
    5. Male breast (4)
    6. Male ass (3)

    Normal parts:
    1. Male stomach (8)
    2. Female legs (7)
    3. Male arms (7)
    4. Female stomach (6)
    5. Female arms (5)
    6. Male legs (4)
    7. Male feet (3)
    8. Female feet (1)

    So generally it's difficult. For example penis is the best thing for me. Oral sex would be perfect for me. But for some reason I cannot imagine anal sex with male, but with female. Cause of this I cannot imaginge to have a partner of one gender, because I won't like everything about him. (I am a highly demanding person in general).

    I am wondering if I just have 50% sexuality for every gender so that I would need somebody with a mixture of each gender. What do you think?
     
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  2. G.man

    G.man Sexy Member

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    First of all, I think you’re really normal, and there’s loads of people that feel the same way. They like both sexes for different things. For instance, I’d rather go down on a woman than have penetrative sex with her. Yet all go for men.
    I also know plenty of gay guys who don’t do anal sex at all. So don’t worry about that too much.
    Don’t be in a rush to give yourself a label. Sexuality and sexual attraction can be like a buffet: there’s no rules. If you want to have nothing but a margarita pizza, that’s your choice. If you want to start with the desserts then go back to cold meats and cheeses you can. If you want bolognese with rice, you can. If you want to put chicken tikka on a bowl of ice cream, you can. It’s not for everyone, but if that’s what you and your current partner/partners like, then why the hell not enjoy it all?
    But if you are looking to identify with a group, I would assume that at this moment you’re Pansexual. But take time to experiment and figure out, or don’t figure it out and let it be fluid.

    Enjoy the buffet.
     
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  3. hotdog7

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    Thanks for you kind words. I guess you are right. I remember that I like porn man+woman but don't like man+man or woman+woman, only a little bit.
    Sexuality also is influenced by my personal attitude. Generally I am a very open minded person. Also I never had a real partnership since I was 14 or so but that comes that I don't want to be in relationship as it's like a prison and I want to be in freedom.
     
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  4. G.man

    G.man Sexy Member

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    Enjoy dating. And when you find the right partnership (in whatever form that comes in) it won’t feel like a prison.
     
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  5. palakaorion

    palakaorion Superior Member

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    Danish philosopher Søren Kierkegaard: ( paraphrase) when you label me, you begin to negate me.

    Don't get hung up on labels. Love who you love and fuck who you desire.
     
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  6. Sagittarius84

    Sagittarius84 Legendary Member

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    Short answer OP, you're bisexual(or pansexual as you hadnt expressed any opinion of non gender conforming or trans folk). Its not a label to fear(nor should any label incite such a fear), just a simple description of your sexual attraction.
    Seems the bigger question for you would be less of with whom you would sex, and more would that one person be sufficient to provide you with your sexual needs...
    And even before that which gender would you actually be interested in being in a relationship in, because you cant assume a sexual attraction to all is going to translate to romantic feelings for all as well.
     
  7. XAE14G

    XAE14G Sexy Member

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    I have been in relationships with both, male and female. I can say that I have enjoyed them both equally, in the affection part as well as in the intimate part. At least in my case, my boyfriend was not very dramatic about relationship issues as my girlfriend was, I guess that's how it is. Just give yourself sometime to discover your inner feelings. I took mine and discovered that it was about the person and the feelings and not about the labels attached. Last word of advice: enjoy your current partner, be a man or a woman. Whatever happens between you and that other person is private.
     
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  8. cofrader

    cofrader Admired Member

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    That’s a question for yourself, know yourself, I won’t answer the pool.
    What was your real experience discovering yourself if is just porn you haven’t even started.
    You could chop the parts you like and dismiss the ones you don’t nip them together and apply electricity. This is not a menu you are picking a human that will be more that his body parts.
    Really, you need to find out what want in life, what do you imagine yourself on 10 years?
    Your description could be placed on every gender especially when you say would, “I think I would like bungee jumping but when I climb up the bridge I couldn’t do it”
    To find another person I think you need bear yourself first and accept yourself then see who would like to share your journey.
     
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  9. hotdog7

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    If I think about it I would say that I am open for everything. If I mix the best parts my perfect partner woud be like:

    1. Male Penis (10)
    2. Female Ass (9)
    3. Male stomach (8)
    4. Female legs (7)
    5. Female breast (7)
    6. Male arms (7)
    7. Female vagina (5)
    8. Male feet (3)

    This really sounds near like transgender, but penis and vagina together would be hard to find.


    Sometimes I do not feel like having so sex when I think about a partner, so could it be possible to be pansexual and asexual at the same time?
     
  10. MickeyLee

    Staff Member Moderator Gold Member

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    Umm, something else = undecided?

    Fluidity, baby. Ya might be one of the people who embrace it.

    Do ya mind a question? Asked in a not perving on you looking for more information way.

    Do you have a sexual history with men and women? More one than the other?

    If you're trying to gauge sexuality from the porn you enjoy there is gonna be some clouding of waters. Like, looking at the menu vs trying the dish. Ya don't know until it's in your mouth. That statement totally applies to sex as well.

    On what parts or acts turn you on/interests you more. Sex acts don't define, and are not required for any sexuality. Gay doesn't mean WooHoo Buttsex!! Straight doesn't mean Pussy Murauder!!

    There are heaps of variation to be explored.
     
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  11. MickeyLee

    Staff Member Moderator Gold Member

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    Wayne's World
     
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  12. malakos

    malakos Superior Member

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    Sounds like what appeals to you is too compartmentalized for it to make sense to say that you are attracted to men or attracted to women. If you were one of these things, I think you'd be able to say in an overall sense "There are some men I'm attracted to." or "There are some women I'm attracted to." And if you were able to do that, it would become clear how, at least to some extent, you fit into one of the categories you named. But, given that your focus seems to be strictly on parts, whatever your sexuality is, it would seem to not neatly fit these categories.
     
  13. Infernal

    Gold Member Platinum Gold

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    You like what you like. You don’t have to justify it to anyone. Consider yourself a sexual person and don’t worry about a definition.
     
  14. hypolimnas

    hypolimnas Superior Member

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    Don't limit yourself to one person sexually, you don't ever have to in real life ... and maybe consider sex with couples from time to time. Also perhaps factor in to your future that you might fall in love with a person and find a whole lot of things attractive about them that are unrelated to physical appearance.
     
  15. headbang8

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    @hotdog7, this is the most beautifully, wonderfully German thing I’ve ever read. A nation of engineers, no? Servus aus München.
     
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  16. ChanelleNo5

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    Just picking bi cause I think most people are at least curious.
     
  17. englad

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    You sound bi to me.

    Just throwing it out there that you aren't required to be interested in anal sex to be part of an m/m couple. Plenty of gay male couples don't have anal sex.

    Viel Erfolg bei deiner Suche! :)
     
  18. hotdog7

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    With 13 I had these first girlfirend as everbody, and a second but it doesn't took long, only kissing. But I was heavy love.
    After that I never felt in real love again, I just had some movements to a boy, but he was straight.
    With 20 I was in a whorehouse (I think you call it like this in english, otherway please correct me). I was very drunken. He came hard and I put him inside here and then he gone away.
    I feel my heart more bouncing when a boy is sitting next to me. So if I would decide between female and male I would go for m 65%, f 35%.

    Sometimes thinking about other persons having sex is more interesting than imagine myself having sex.

    I can really sure say that I am not what the society calls "normal" so I think I won't be a good stereotype for ther Germans :). (My job is building web applications, so I guess I am a very abstract and analytical person). Servus vom Bodensee.

    How do you know between bisexuel and pansexual?
    Danke.:D
     
  19. Beanie

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    I know that the whole point of this thread is to put a label on you but I would advise that if you don’t feel comfortable with a label, then why search for one? It might be so freeing for you to just be you instead.

    If you really want to identify as something and put a label on it to ‘belong’ so to speak maybe pan sexual would be most appropriate? It sounds the most accurate to me especially when you’re splitting body parts up in terms of sexual attraction. Are you more attracted to trans women who haven’t had bottom surgery? What porn do you watch most?
     
  20. hotdog7

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    That's the most difficult part. I am enjoying straight porn to most.
    For some reason I don't like gay porn, I get a strange feeling about it. So sometimes I am asking myself if I just don't want to be because of society, but I would be open for it, but I cannot force myself.
    Lesbian is ok, but I don't feel very much about it.
     
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