What is the funniest situation that you have ever been in having sex?

[D_Tallie_Wacker]

My wife and I were staying at my parent's house for a little while and one day during the day we decide to get it on in my old room we were staying in.

I had her laid out on the bed, spread totally eagle, and I'm on my knees on the floor licking and kissing her all over.

Suddenly the door opens and in walks my younger teengage brother (he was like 17 at the time)... I had forgotten the lock on that door was broke and didn't work, meanwhile my wife is lying their spread, pussy toward the door.

Instinctively I reach back with my leg and kick the door right into my brother, and continue pushing it shut with my door. We were just like WTF, it killed the mood though we were laughing and I had to go out and have a talk with him about knocking on people's doors, not just opening them.

It was very awkward for my wife to see him after than considering he saw -everything- and was most likely the very first girl he had seen totally naked in person.

 

[WeirdLabs]

Some years ago me and my girlfriend decided to try out this new thing. So I prepared the room and lit candles to get her in the right mood.
On our old box-madras I put a black latex-sheet and next to it I had a big bottle of oil.
We were going to have some fun tonight...
And all went well. We were fondling around, all covered in oil, and it was really exciting to feel the soft and slippery feeling when we touched each other.
Suddenly I lost my grip on her. Everything was so slippery there was no way to hold on to anything. So I could do nothing except keep eye contact with my love while I slowly slid towards the edge of the bed, clawing and scratching, trying to grip anything that would stop my fall.
<Bump> So there I was lying on my back on the floor like a oily turtle. Arms and legs up in the air and laughing so hard that my stomach cramped.
And every time I tried to get on the bed again I just slipped off and fell back on the floor.
We both laughed so hard there was no way for us to get back in a romantic mood so we gave up and hit the showers. Still laughing.

 

[D_Edwin Eatser]

It was the end-of-the night orgy in a crowded swinger club playroom and I'd just swapped to a new woman. After a bit of kissing I knelt up and leant across her to lick her cunt and very soon after she gave a moan and squirted into my mouth. I automatically jerked my head up, and her second squirt, which was stronger, showered all over a young couple who were fucking in mish just below her feet. The young girl was initially shocked, then started giggling which set her lover and me off too. The woman I was with hadn't realized what had happened and when she did, she nearly died with embarrassment, apologized and rushed out. She wouldn't go back into the big playroom so we found a private one and carried on.

 

[DevonTexas]

college. having sex on the floor. got a bit wild. knocked over the christmas tree.... into the fireplace.... which was already ablaze.

 

[chefgreg]

I use to fuck this whore of a girl. One day she calls me and is like can I come over and I said yeah but douche your ass first. She agrees and shows up a few hours later. Man I was fuckin the shit out her litterally, the dumb bitch forgot to douche. I had shit all over my dick and she's like sorry then she farts and sprays a fine mist of shit and cum all over may wall and computer moniter. Nasty bitch, I never talked to her again after that.

 

[D_Jimmy Jammer]

That's funny..?

 

[damnimbi]

A few years after high school, both my gf and I were fairly inexperienced. I found a park that had lots of trees and brush, hoping it would hide the car (both of us were still living with parents). About 30 minutes, after forgetting about where we were, these lights show up in the back.......white red and blue (no, not a 4th of july parade). We hurried to get our clothes on, and soon a cop is tapping the glass with her baton. My gf tells me to stay put, gets out and talks with the female cop. I'm scared, worried about losing my car, etc., when she comes back and says we should leave. This very young, inexperienced, and somewhat 'traditional' asian girl, told the female cop "damn, and I almost got some after waiting so long". Granted, it came with an apology, but the cop just told us to leave..........I'll never forget the look on her face....