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589189
Guest
I rarely comment on things like this. Regarding 'fucking-the-ex', all i can say is RUN....RUN AWAY in the opposite direction and keep running. Do not fall into 'fucking-the-ex', its a massive -Mind-Hell, but as has been mentioned by other seasones veterans, we often have to learn from experience. I do recall being told, "this tends to not work....", but of course i had to learn from experience.....OUCH. I have learned.
Theres a few stand out points. If my girlfriend leaves willingly as part of a mutual breakup and remains separate, then expresses that she has changed her mind and now values me more than before, is this someone who can make a good decision, be able to consider other people, and be responsible and own the results of their actions. Why would i consider them to be honest, trustworthy, considerate, reasonable, practical etc etc.
I guess I would also need to look at how this behavior elicits such confusion in me, if i dont particularly like them, dont respect them regarding their conduct and lack of consideration, and i have a doubt about thier fidelity. How is it possible that this persons behavior is having this impact on me. Is it possible that the question that is of at least equal importance is "What am I trying to do to me?"
Theres just no substitute for experience.
One way or another something will be learned as a result of doing it.
Theres a few stand out points. If my girlfriend leaves willingly as part of a mutual breakup and remains separate, then expresses that she has changed her mind and now values me more than before, is this someone who can make a good decision, be able to consider other people, and be responsible and own the results of their actions. Why would i consider them to be honest, trustworthy, considerate, reasonable, practical etc etc.
I guess I would also need to look at how this behavior elicits such confusion in me, if i dont particularly like them, dont respect them regarding their conduct and lack of consideration, and i have a doubt about thier fidelity. How is it possible that this persons behavior is having this impact on me. Is it possible that the question that is of at least equal importance is "What am I trying to do to me?"
Theres just no substitute for experience.
One way or another something will be learned as a result of doing it.