What Makes You A Good Friend?

Discussion in 'Relationships, Discrimination, and Jealousy' started by B_Jennuine73, Oct 8, 2007.

  1. B_Jennuine73

    B_Jennuine73 New Member

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    I'm sure we've all heard the expression "Friends come and go."

    I don't think that is necessarily true. A good friend is going to be in your life forever.

    What makes you a good friend?
    I am a good friend because I am a good listener. My friends know I am open minded and won't pass judgement. I won't give advice unless asked and if I get pissed off about something, I will tell them right away and not let it fester.
     
  2. D_Gunther Snotpole

    D_Gunther Snotpole Account Disabled

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    I don't believe this, Jennuine.
    I believe some quite poor friendships may last a lifetime.
    And someone who is your good friend at one point in time may, as the decades pass, move into other orbits from which the friendship that once worked well no longer offers much.
    Do you, for example, think that every marriage that ends in divorce must have been poor, even from the beginning?
    I don't.
    And I use that only as an example to show that all relationships can die over time ... even the ones that once seemed best.

    I could say basically the same thing, though I sometimes do let things fester.
    I really believe I am a good listener ... and if you think otherwise, I don't want to hear about it. (joke)
    My main fault as a friend is my aversion to entertaining at home. I love to go places and sing for my supper ... but I'm not much of a host.
     
  3. B_Jennuine73

    B_Jennuine73 New Member

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    I guess I am lucky in my life that I have not lost any good friends. A friend of mine moved across the country and we don't talk very often but when we do, we are able to pick up where we left off.

    My good friends I had in high school and grade school are still good friends.

    I have had friends I have lost, but I think they weren't really good friends to begin with. May have seemed like it at the time, but when I look at certain character traits that came out, I know I didn't know the real person.

    I know quite a few marriages that ended in divorce and the people are still friends, even ones who don't have kids.

    I guess if you are real, and the other person is real, the friendship will last.

    I stand by my statement :p :)
     
  4. PaulF

    PaulF New Member

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    I agree! I have had the same friend (even when we don't see each other very often or ever speak) for 25 years! but like you, when we do get together we are like kids again.
    Like I have said in another thread you can meet people all your life, but still be alone, yet 1 or 2 friends that they would give you thier last penny/dime you can count on one hand!:smile:
     
  5. Osiris

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    What makes me a good friend? I have no clue, all I can say is what I do for my friends.

    I am the guy who will come save you in the snow and rain at 3 AM. I am the guy who will sit in the hospital room waiting for you to come to. I am the guy who will give you my last dollar if it makes your life a little better.

    My one weakness in life? Giving to someone else before taking care of me.
     
  6. D_Gunther Snotpole

    D_Gunther Snotpole Account Disabled

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    Well, Paul, I would certainly agree that the best friendships will tend to last longer.
    But if you're saying that good friendships will last, that means that no friendship that doesn't last was ever any good.
    And that's just not true, imo.
    This was where Jennuine and I disagreed.
     
  7. PaulF

    PaulF New Member

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    I agree with you also!
    I too have met some friends who said they would do anything for you if I was in trouble! but when you are in trouble their off like dust:confused: But at the time you like to think they will be friends for life!:smile:
    If not why bother making friends you might as well lock youself away and speak to no one in fear they friendships not going to last!
     
  8. SpeedoGuy

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    I don't know if I myself have ever been a great friend. Its hard for me to tell. Of what friends I still have, middle age responsibilities and duties largely preclude me from visiting with them much anymore. But here are a few qualities I have striven for:

    * ability to listen without becoming too emotionally involved too quickly
    * abilty to give straight facts and evaluations without insensitivity
    * ability to oversee the faults for the greater good
    * reliability to hang in there during the tough times
    * longevity of friendship
    * loyalty
    * humor
    * ability to reminisce and revel in shared past experiences
     
  9. ripsrips

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    Letting my friend see and help me out when I'm naked or helpless and him coming to help me weather I'm coherent or not and not making things sexual in my eyes!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
    When I come too!!!!!!!!!!!!!
     
  10. ripsrips

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    Letting my friend see and help me out when I'm naked or helpless and him coming to help me weather I'm coherent or not and not making things sexual in my eyes!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
    When I come too!!!!!!!!!!!!!
     
  11. SpoiledPrincess

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    My friend insisted on getting up and singing karaoke, she was terrible, so despite hating karaoke I got up and sang with her for moral support - that's what makes me a good friend that I'll help my friends in any way I can.
     
  12. jason_els

    jason_els <img border="0" src="/images/badges/gold_member.gi

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    Whether I am a good friend or not depends on what my friends think of me. You'd have to ask them.
     
  13. B_Hung Jon

    B_Hung Jon New Member

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    For it's really about love. Not exactly romantic love but love anyway. I love my friends very much.
     
  14. cadejc

    cadejc New Member

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    Hi Guys

    I have had the same friends for the past 14 years and I have just descovered that I have never fought with one of them, the rest we have had our fairf shares of drama and we wouldnt speack for weeks.
    what I am trying to say here is that, yes we all evolve and do meet other people, but there are those who stay and for life.
     
  15. ALBNM11

    ALBNM11 New Member

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    I belive that friends come and go for a reason. sometimes you need to learn a lesson some times you need to experance something different. But the true hard core friends will stay with you forever. The key to that friendship is allowing the other person to change and grow. Too many times friendship ends because the reason you were close is not a factor in your lives and you miss that connection. but if you allow your friend to grow you can spend a lifetime with that person constantly showing you how much people can grow and how great it is to have them around
     
  16. wldhoney

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    I tend to keep my close friends over many years and add to the count as time goes by, both male and female, and I can honestly say I could never imagine my life without them.

    We all discuss what keeps us close. Even when moving away and dealing with distance, these are friends that I can call and it's as if we are still seeing each other every day.

    I've been told that what my friends count on from me includes being open-minded, I can keep confidences, I don't hold grudges or get angry over disagreements, when they call and need something, no matter what time it is or what is going on, if it's money, transportation, bail (yes, it happens), I will be there.

    And I know that I can depend on them in turn. I know that if I need help, they will gladly give it. I can trust them to stand by me thru thick and thin, to defend me and support me. And they will laugh with me over the silly stuff.
     
  17. TheRob

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    because I'll do anything I can for a friend
    I am always happy to listen (even tho some friends don't tell me what is bothering them anymore : o ( ) that pains me greatly
    and I will protect a friend even if it means pissing them off
    I'm just a good person, nice guy type
    oh and I NEVER let a girl think she is unattractive or go w/out a compliment
    I believe people have a RIGHT to know the possitive things you think about them

    oh and I help people move heavy objects
     
  18. Principessa

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    You sound like the male version of me. :biggrin1::cool:

    When my best friends lover was in the hospital and he was having some difficulty detoxing from Klonapin I was one of two people who sat up with him, fed him, and drove him back and forth to the hospital to see his hubby during his 'normal' moments.


    "A friend will help you move, a good friend will help you bury a dead hooker and not ask any questions." Ben Affleck

     
  19. avg_joe

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    Cool. Can I be your friend? :biggrin1:
     
  20. D_Fluoridia Bidet

    D_Fluoridia Bidet New Member

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    For 9 years my friend has been in my life, we were meant to be together. The odd thing is that her mother knew my mother and we didn't know that. We also do things at the same time we are so much alike she is an exact replica of my personality. I believe we are soul friends kinda like the word soul mate.

    I am a good friend because it's all about love and happiness and two friends share the same universal space. Kinda weird but true.
     
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