- Joined
- Nov 8, 2006
- Posts
- 59
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- 1
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- 153
- Age
- 38
- Location
- Sackville, Nova Scotia, Canada
- Sexuality
- 99% Gay, 1% Straight
- Gender
- Male
I joined the site a long time ago and just let it fall to the back burner for me... I just... haven't had time but now I need help and advice... I hope I can still get some... even if I'm not a major contributor...
anyway
here goes *Takes deep breath*
So I met this guy... just a bit before joining the site actually.
and we hit it off really great. We get along well, have fairly similar interest, enjoy each other's company and can spend long periods of time together...
after a few months we decided that we were going to move in together...
it has worked out fairly well at least it did at first.
We rented (at first) seperate rooms in the same basement apartment, you know just make sure we could live together without suffocating one another. Then we moved into the same room.
Things didn't deteriorate....
that was last august...
that's the flat background but every story has different details to it so I guess I'll go into more detail cause right now it probably sounds like a decent deal.
So let's start back at the beginning. We took it slow emotionally... we didn't want to rush into things or anything... Just friends to start... neither of us had been looking for someone else in the first place. Sex on the other hand was awesome... and frequent. We're talking those nice two hour I came three times and lost count of how many times he did kind of sessions... and that would happen a few times a week...
To be fair I'm a three times a day kind of person... so I'm always kind of ready and in the mood. Anyway. We started out January of 2007 (after a little dating in december). In February he invited me to a party his friends were having. Now I'm not good with crowds of strangers and I told him so but agreed to go and meet his friends. So I wallflowered a bit, mingled a bit and got to know people... As the party was winding down and I realized we were way to drunk to drive home. I curled up in a blanket by myself... unable to find him... There was a lot of sex noise coming from upstairs. Which was him and another girl. I had a jealousy fit in my head. I was... livid... bring me to a party, introduce me to ALL your friends as your BOYFRIEND and then sleep with a chick. wtf right?
Maybe I'm too nice or something but we talked about it. I mean I'm polyamorous (able to love or have more than one partner at a time) so I wasn't so upset about him sleeping with someone else, as the principle and timing of it... I mean I wouldn't mind him sleeping with someone else with me in the room and not part of it... I'm ok that way...
I don't know but either way... aside from the talk we had about it... there was no other ruffled feathers... water under the bridge I let it go and he got off scott free so I'm sure he didn't think about it any further either.
In march we borrowed his parents van and I brought him to meet my parents (not so much because he was my boyfriend but because my Dad and Step mother are REALLY awesome and like to meet anyone important to me) he was a little scared but adjusted quickly when he realized my dad is just a big goofball. On the return from that trip was the most intense sexual experience I've ever had... with him or anyone... ever, before and since.
If there's one thing he's always liked about me in bed... it's that I can take every bit of him (girls apparently can't) and that I can keep going hour after hour... Just as long as he starts slow and get's me to loosen up a bit (he's thick as my wrist)
Anyway, after that he had a new roomate move in, someone who had feelings for him. A slightly older boy who had started the transition into becoming a girl but then decided to stay a boy. In the end what you end up with is a boy with A-cups.
Nice enough but always treated me like I was in the way and a threat. My bf had never really liked him that much but they had started as friends and it had been flirty and then he'd tried to back off later...
They ended up sleeping together. By now we had put up some ground rules.
1. If you sleep with someone else, use protection (don't bring any thing home)
2. If you sleep with someone else, don't lie about it and be honest right away (Don't cheat)
I had suspected something had happened... I asked him directly... and he said no. Later though in what I assume was an attempt to get me very angry the other boy told me everything. Naturally I snapped. Jealousy runs rampant in me... it only seems to get the better of me when I feel wronged though. And man did I feel wronged. and he would NOT talk about it. In fact he locked himself in his room and refused to do anything more than acknowledge that it had happened. That was enough for me and I broke up with him.
Less than a week later we were back to talking about it. And we reaffirmed the ground rules. He still to this day will not acknowledge everything that happened but at least he admits that something did. It's a sore spot for me... I made it very clear that the rules had to be followed without deviation anymore if I were to be able to trust him. On that promise we got back together.
Our sex life was never the same after that though.
In April I met another boy online and we hit it off ok. I was completely open and honest with my first bf about it and he was an active part of it. I didn't want him to be jealous or think that I was hiding anything. He was in fact very supportive. In august me and my now second bf... moved into the house with my first bf... in the other room in the basement. Pretty boy (the boy with boobs) had the third room, though after the whole fiasco between him and my first bf not only did any chance of a relationship fall apart but so did there friendship.
As far as roomates went we all got along. Pretty boy was always kind of on the outside of the three of us (me and the two guys I was with) but that was by choice... I never really fooled around too much with my second bf... he was younger, rather inexperienced. We played here and there, but between dropping out of school, losing welfare and not being able to hold a job I ended up having to kick him out because I couldn't afford to take care of him and our relationship had degraded to formal greetings between his 12 hour bouts of video games. So by august of this year Second Bf was gone. Leaving it to just first Bf and me (Pretty boy moved out in February of this year after nearly driving himself into a breakdown over how much My Bf did not love him)
now it's coming up on christmas and it's been just me and my first Bf who's now out of college and doing the contract worker thing. I do deliveries and have kept a steady job (as always) meaning that I am sefl sufficient.
Our relationship is... emotionally strong. but sex pretty much ended after he slept with pretty boy... I can count the number of times since then on my fingers and never once has he gotten off (or even tried to do anymore than get me off as quick as possible).
What bugs me most is we used to frequently visit my ex and his roomies (we broke up years ago but still get along really well, also I lived with them as roomies before I moved in with my current) the person who replaced me is a cute little twink boy.
Maybe an inch taller than me cute little stoner with a ripped body. There's no way for me to compete with that. I'm shoter, chunky and not cute. So I don't compete lol. It does bug me how easily my bf can fool around with him though. In the hot tub, at their place when I'm away for work... etc. but I'll come and he's sick, or tired, or not in the mood. He says he still finds me attractive but I really starting to disbeleive it. At least he was honest about sleeping with stoner boy though.
He doesn't anymore but I think that's because we don't really go over there anymore. After my second bf moved out in august we had two empty rooms to fill so my ex moved in with one of the roommates, stoner boy and the others stayed behind and have since alienated themselves from us and don't talk to us anymore.
Two months ago, a girl he met at the party where he slept with another girl, got a hold of him and had a lot of interest in him sexually. He was honest and up front about it. and I had no problem with it. I mean, he hadn't slept with me in two months, but he'd been sick and very busy. So they did... and he got sick down there.
Well that was an experience. He had been having trouble in the first place with condoms. As I said he was thick and regular condoms would usually squeeze him too tightly, so I went out myself and bought him the Magnums he needed (which are still a little snug for him). I had him try one on before anything happened with her just to make sure they fit without making him go down and they did. (I would've helped him more with that but I'm alergic to latex and the polyurethane condoms are a bit too expensive for me to buying him to fuck someone else when he's not fucking me)
There was one less afterwards and he says he used protection when he got down to the nitty gritty but not during when she was going down on him. Which I guess I understand... but still... It got me a little worried. all that aside anyway. it's now been nearly 4 months since him and I have had any form of penetrative sex (anal or oral) and even then just fooling around in the same room is almost nil as well.
Anyway, he's all cleaned up now. But more stressed, busy and sick than ever. Except that he's so sick he doesn't work, he hasn't helped with the house work (except to make a mess) in over 6 months and he jerks off almost 5 times a day. Actually he jerked off 5 times a day even when we fooled around twice a day lol. He tells me that with the way he always feels that his sex drive is completely dead. What he doesn't realize is I clean the towels and empty the laundry baskets so I know that's not true...
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anyway
here goes *Takes deep breath*
So I met this guy... just a bit before joining the site actually.
and we hit it off really great. We get along well, have fairly similar interest, enjoy each other's company and can spend long periods of time together...
after a few months we decided that we were going to move in together...
it has worked out fairly well at least it did at first.
We rented (at first) seperate rooms in the same basement apartment, you know just make sure we could live together without suffocating one another. Then we moved into the same room.
Things didn't deteriorate....
that was last august...
that's the flat background but every story has different details to it so I guess I'll go into more detail cause right now it probably sounds like a decent deal.
So let's start back at the beginning. We took it slow emotionally... we didn't want to rush into things or anything... Just friends to start... neither of us had been looking for someone else in the first place. Sex on the other hand was awesome... and frequent. We're talking those nice two hour I came three times and lost count of how many times he did kind of sessions... and that would happen a few times a week...
To be fair I'm a three times a day kind of person... so I'm always kind of ready and in the mood. Anyway. We started out January of 2007 (after a little dating in december). In February he invited me to a party his friends were having. Now I'm not good with crowds of strangers and I told him so but agreed to go and meet his friends. So I wallflowered a bit, mingled a bit and got to know people... As the party was winding down and I realized we were way to drunk to drive home. I curled up in a blanket by myself... unable to find him... There was a lot of sex noise coming from upstairs. Which was him and another girl. I had a jealousy fit in my head. I was... livid... bring me to a party, introduce me to ALL your friends as your BOYFRIEND and then sleep with a chick. wtf right?
Maybe I'm too nice or something but we talked about it. I mean I'm polyamorous (able to love or have more than one partner at a time) so I wasn't so upset about him sleeping with someone else, as the principle and timing of it... I mean I wouldn't mind him sleeping with someone else with me in the room and not part of it... I'm ok that way...
I don't know but either way... aside from the talk we had about it... there was no other ruffled feathers... water under the bridge I let it go and he got off scott free so I'm sure he didn't think about it any further either.
In march we borrowed his parents van and I brought him to meet my parents (not so much because he was my boyfriend but because my Dad and Step mother are REALLY awesome and like to meet anyone important to me) he was a little scared but adjusted quickly when he realized my dad is just a big goofball. On the return from that trip was the most intense sexual experience I've ever had... with him or anyone... ever, before and since.
If there's one thing he's always liked about me in bed... it's that I can take every bit of him (girls apparently can't) and that I can keep going hour after hour... Just as long as he starts slow and get's me to loosen up a bit (he's thick as my wrist)
Anyway, after that he had a new roomate move in, someone who had feelings for him. A slightly older boy who had started the transition into becoming a girl but then decided to stay a boy. In the end what you end up with is a boy with A-cups.
Nice enough but always treated me like I was in the way and a threat. My bf had never really liked him that much but they had started as friends and it had been flirty and then he'd tried to back off later...
They ended up sleeping together. By now we had put up some ground rules.
1. If you sleep with someone else, use protection (don't bring any thing home)
2. If you sleep with someone else, don't lie about it and be honest right away (Don't cheat)
I had suspected something had happened... I asked him directly... and he said no. Later though in what I assume was an attempt to get me very angry the other boy told me everything. Naturally I snapped. Jealousy runs rampant in me... it only seems to get the better of me when I feel wronged though. And man did I feel wronged. and he would NOT talk about it. In fact he locked himself in his room and refused to do anything more than acknowledge that it had happened. That was enough for me and I broke up with him.
Less than a week later we were back to talking about it. And we reaffirmed the ground rules. He still to this day will not acknowledge everything that happened but at least he admits that something did. It's a sore spot for me... I made it very clear that the rules had to be followed without deviation anymore if I were to be able to trust him. On that promise we got back together.
Our sex life was never the same after that though.
In April I met another boy online and we hit it off ok. I was completely open and honest with my first bf about it and he was an active part of it. I didn't want him to be jealous or think that I was hiding anything. He was in fact very supportive. In august me and my now second bf... moved into the house with my first bf... in the other room in the basement. Pretty boy (the boy with boobs) had the third room, though after the whole fiasco between him and my first bf not only did any chance of a relationship fall apart but so did there friendship.
As far as roomates went we all got along. Pretty boy was always kind of on the outside of the three of us (me and the two guys I was with) but that was by choice... I never really fooled around too much with my second bf... he was younger, rather inexperienced. We played here and there, but between dropping out of school, losing welfare and not being able to hold a job I ended up having to kick him out because I couldn't afford to take care of him and our relationship had degraded to formal greetings between his 12 hour bouts of video games. So by august of this year Second Bf was gone. Leaving it to just first Bf and me (Pretty boy moved out in February of this year after nearly driving himself into a breakdown over how much My Bf did not love him)
now it's coming up on christmas and it's been just me and my first Bf who's now out of college and doing the contract worker thing. I do deliveries and have kept a steady job (as always) meaning that I am sefl sufficient.
Our relationship is... emotionally strong. but sex pretty much ended after he slept with pretty boy... I can count the number of times since then on my fingers and never once has he gotten off (or even tried to do anymore than get me off as quick as possible).
What bugs me most is we used to frequently visit my ex and his roomies (we broke up years ago but still get along really well, also I lived with them as roomies before I moved in with my current) the person who replaced me is a cute little twink boy.
Maybe an inch taller than me cute little stoner with a ripped body. There's no way for me to compete with that. I'm shoter, chunky and not cute. So I don't compete lol. It does bug me how easily my bf can fool around with him though. In the hot tub, at their place when I'm away for work... etc. but I'll come and he's sick, or tired, or not in the mood. He says he still finds me attractive but I really starting to disbeleive it. At least he was honest about sleeping with stoner boy though.
He doesn't anymore but I think that's because we don't really go over there anymore. After my second bf moved out in august we had two empty rooms to fill so my ex moved in with one of the roommates, stoner boy and the others stayed behind and have since alienated themselves from us and don't talk to us anymore.
Two months ago, a girl he met at the party where he slept with another girl, got a hold of him and had a lot of interest in him sexually. He was honest and up front about it. and I had no problem with it. I mean, he hadn't slept with me in two months, but he'd been sick and very busy. So they did... and he got sick down there.
Well that was an experience. He had been having trouble in the first place with condoms. As I said he was thick and regular condoms would usually squeeze him too tightly, so I went out myself and bought him the Magnums he needed (which are still a little snug for him). I had him try one on before anything happened with her just to make sure they fit without making him go down and they did. (I would've helped him more with that but I'm alergic to latex and the polyurethane condoms are a bit too expensive for me to buying him to fuck someone else when he's not fucking me)
There was one less afterwards and he says he used protection when he got down to the nitty gritty but not during when she was going down on him. Which I guess I understand... but still... It got me a little worried. all that aside anyway. it's now been nearly 4 months since him and I have had any form of penetrative sex (anal or oral) and even then just fooling around in the same room is almost nil as well.
Anyway, he's all cleaned up now. But more stressed, busy and sick than ever. Except that he's so sick he doesn't work, he hasn't helped with the house work (except to make a mess) in over 6 months and he jerks off almost 5 times a day. Actually he jerked off 5 times a day even when we fooled around twice a day lol. He tells me that with the way he always feels that his sex drive is completely dead. What he doesn't realize is I clean the towels and empty the laundry baskets so I know that's not true...
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