I don't understand the need to lie about the size. There's nothing you can do to change it, just accept the size it is and move on. It is what it is, be proud that you have one that works and can get the job done.
When asked about my size, I just tell people that it's "large"--no one believes the size if I tell them in inches, so I let them just see for themselves in person. The description of "large" usually works since they can usually see a bulge anyway, even if I try to hide it.