What would you do with a 30 inch penis?

Discussion in 'Sex With a Large Penis' started by Lordpendragon, Oct 4, 2006.

  1. Lordpendragon

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    My GF and I need some new ideas to spice things up.

    Please only give sensible answers.
     
  2. B_Stronzo

    B_Stronzo New Member

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    I'm sorry I can't answer that thread title sensitively.

    Personally? I'd never leave my room and have a step ladder handy at all times.

    LPD- Are you looking for more inventive ways to have sex??
     
  3. B_Hickboy

    B_Hickboy New Member

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    I would anally rape Rachael Ray.
     
  4. Gillette

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    Sell tickets.
     
  5. midnight

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    I would join the Circus and be part of a sword-swallowing act or give twenty inches away to two friends with tiny ones. If I have friends with tiny ones. Actually the sword swallowing thing sounds like a fun career. Never mind....
     
  6. Pecker

    Pecker Retired Moderator
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    I'd mount my mailbox on it and lie down next to my driveway.
     
  7. davidjh7

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    Sigh---and here I thought I was being creatively funny suggesting this new thread, and the Lord has gone and made it already....timing IS e3verything in comedy.:tongue:
     
  8. geek0

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    scare door to door salesmen :18:
     
  9. zaza

    zaza New Member

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    Have difficulty in getting close
     
  10. hungschlong

    hungschlong Member

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    Invite Madam-X over LOL.
     
  11. AlteredEgo

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    I'd be careful not to step on it.

    Um.. I dunno. I assume this is some toy or other you're buying. Get it with double ends, and you can both enjoy it.

    Slap someone in the face with it. Does that count as sexual assault?

    I'd suck it myself. I could reach something nearly a yard from my crotch easily.

    Let your wife dress you up like her female lover and both of you suck it together, pretending to be groupies of some rock and roll god.

    Drill a hole in it, and drink through it like a straw.

    Put it in your pants and watch reactions. Rub it against willing women in clubs.

    Frighten a hooker.

    use it for golf.

    Lots of paperwork? Now THAT's a paperweight.
     
  12. DC_DEEP

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    LPD, I can't answer until you clear up one little detail for me... are you asking what would I do if it were attached to me, or what I would do if it were in front of me?
     
  13. mindseye

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    Obviously, I'd get on AOL account and tell people it was thirty-five inches.
     
  14. jeff black

    jeff black <img border="0" src="/images/badges/gold_member.gi

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    I would chop it up into 1 inch peices and give it to 30 people who want to be a bit bigger.
     
  15. roosevelt

    roosevelt New Member

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    take up a career in nudist baseball
     
  16. roosevelt

    roosevelt New Member

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    tie a bow to it, and go tell a tailor that you need special pants so that you can be more comfortable with your "tail"
     
  17. roosevelt

    roosevelt New Member

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    Put a bicycle generator on the end of it so you could charge a battery while you walk
     
  18. roosevelt

    roosevelt New Member

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    Get a peg leg, just so you could wear one pant's leg shorter than the other, and let it hang out
     
  19. roosevelt

    roosevelt New Member

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    name it, and then talk to it at restaurants
     
  20. ruffboy

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    give it a platform and run it for president
     
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