What would you do...?

Discussion in 'Relationships, Discrimination, and Jealousy' started by HungUKProfessional, Nov 21, 2006.

  1. HungUKProfessional

    HungUKProfessional Active Member

    Apr 12, 2006
    Likes Received:
    Hi guys

    I'd like to share something with you and ask for your advice, if I may.

    There's a male/ female couple I know who I met through work and have started to socialise with over the last year or so. The female is more of a friend and she has, over the last couple of months started to tell me about the sexual exploits of her and her fella - it seems they are swingers and although she seems to be enjoying herself, she tells me that her fella is not so keen as his fantasies are just not being catered for in the usual straight swinging scene. He wants to have sex, particularly mutual oral sex with another guy apparently.

    Unbeknown to her, he emailed me last night asking me if I was interested in getting together as he knows that I know what he's looking for, because his girlfriend has told me. We spoke on the phone and he didn't know whether he wanted a 3some with his female partner or a 1-2-1 with me, he just wanted to test my reaction. I made it clear that I'm not into sex with women these days.

    I must admit I do find the guy extremely attractive but I did say to him that I would only go along if his partner was in total agreement and happy with the arrangement, which I guess is really no different to them both going with other swingers. It seems that he has talked about me with her a number of times and it was her who suggested he contact me.

    Things like this don't happen to me and I have to admit I was quite startled by this approach and their openness about their sex lives.

    What would you guys do?
  2. Lordpendragon

    Gold Member

    Jul 5, 2004
    Likes Received:
    There is a major stumbling block here HP IMO.

    It is the fact that he has contacted you without telling her.

    I can understand that he may wish to explore these things without her being there, but given the openness of their normal relationships, this is a worrying departure.

    If you are interested - tell him that you will only consider it if he discusses it openly with her.

    If she's wondering what to do with herself at the time, give her my details - only joking :smile:
  3. pseudocognomen

    pseudocognomen New Member

    Nov 14, 2006
    Likes Received:
    The three of you need to have the discussion together, in the same room.
    And bear in mind that any sexual activity will forever alter your relationship with both of them.
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