Whatcha Got ...?

Discussion in 'New Member Introductions' started by Aruba 1st, Jul 6, 2005.

  1. Aruba 1st

    Aruba 1st Member

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    Standing on the shore.
    Wearing oversized, BLACK swin trunks.

    Shift a little to the right and a lady Tubin' down the Salt River calls out, "Hey, what'cha got in them shorts ?".
    Anothers yells, "Yeah, do that again".
    I reply, "What ?".
    The first calls out "Swing your hips !".

    What do you guys do when public attention is focused on you;
    specifically in a bathingsuit /running shorts as well as in general ?
     
  2. KinkGuy

    Gold Member

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    What's not to like?

    Hell, in that situation I might just show 'em !! :D
     
  3. Aruba 1st

    Aruba 1st Member

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    I did.
    .
    .
    Pulled the left side up to my waist, and shouted "Left leg !"
    dropped it,
    pulled the right side up to my waist, "Right leg !"
    dropped it.
    .
    .
    All that did was get more eyes looking at me and a "Shake it !".
    Did that too.
    :(

    Any FUNNY suggestions ?
     
  4. Aruba 1st

    Aruba 1st Member

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    H-m-m-m-m.
    .
    Maybe I should wear one of the jockstraps with the puppy-doll head.
    Naw, that would only indrease the bulge, increase the attention, and I might get arrested for "flashing" as I exposed the jockstrap.
    .
    So far the best option seems to be to do what ladies do with undesirables.
    Ignore them.
     
  5. BlastOff123

    BlastOff123 New Member

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    I was just tubin the Salt on Saturday, getting out at Phon du Sutton. Wish I'd seen you! Criminy, it was a hot day! But nothing that the river, a lot of sun block, and a cold Moosehead wouldn't solve. :D
     
  6. jonb

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    I don't like the whole thing. It's basically turning me into a sex object. At this point I ignore them, though. It kinda looks scary for me to deck anyone who turns me into a sex object, be that person a woman (in which case I look like a misogynistic bully) or a gay guy (in which case I look like an ignorant fag-basher).
     
  7. Aruba 1st

    Aruba 1st Member

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    Roger that !
    Good job enjoying the river and it's many pleasures, BlastOff123.

    Wow ! - you got out at "Phon D" ?
    Where did you enter the river, Gate Two ?

    I haven't tubed from Gate 1 (the Dude Ranch) to Phon D for a LONG time.

    Yup.
    I use an "8",
    Miller High Life.

    I sometimes provide volunteer duty between Gate 2 (the farthest East the Salt River Tubing buses stop) and the Blue Point bridge. Remember that long, slow stretch after the fast ripples and current at the start ?
    Remember how after that slow stuff ends you swoop down the ripples into the right turn, rotate into a left turn, come up to the rocks, and swirl to the left of the outcropping ?
    I'm the guy on the outcropping waving all the Tubers away from the rocks, yelling out "Careful, Rocks!", pointing at both and arm signalling to move to the south side of the river.
    Yell out "BlastOFF" of you see me someday.

    I don't know who that other family is on the north side - with the three well-built women - trying to coax you to hit the rocks. When I went over to request they desist on Monday I ended up slipping on rocks, fell and busted my butt. It was an Ibuprohen Tuesday.
    :(

    I'll hafta paint "Aruba 1st" on the back of my white, long-sleeves.
    Most folks don't remember me, but they remember the bright green shoe-laces.
    :)

    So, BlastOff,
    If a gal shouted out to you in public to "Shake them things, baby !",
    what would you reply, or do ?
     
  8. Aruba 1st

    Aruba 1st Member

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    Excellent suggestion JonB.
    I'm going to have to practice that "ignore" thing...
    It's not my way...
    Thank you.
     
  9. MASSIVEPKGO_CHUCK

    MASSIVEPKGO_CHUCK Well-Known Member

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    the pain behind your eyes
    If she's going down the river really fast and can't make it to shore, oblige her a quick flash more, and tell her how she's missing a great thing.
     
  10. mimosurfDutch

    mimosurfDutch Member

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    Grab your shaft, give it a shake or three, then turn and leave.

    Or, just turn and leave before you do anything!
     
  11. Aruba 1st

    Aruba 1st Member

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    Morning MASSIVEPKGO_CHUCK,
    We can tell you haven't been Tubin' recently, especially down the Salt.
    This is a VERY Popular event in the Phoenix, Arizona local !

    Women and men don't usually descend alone; they travel in small or large groups - or are thrown together by the current. Some go to talk to the people they meet - usually of the opposite gender, some go to smoke, some to drink - all to have a good time.

    "oblige her a quick Flash"

    So...
    you didn't think my "left leg", "right leg" exposure wasn’t enough, nor funny ?
    How about a humorous suggestion ?

    It wouldn't be just "her" being Flashed, she was with at least one and perhaps two girlfriends at the time of the original request, and there were at least twenty Tubers within Flashing view.

    "tell her how she's missing a great thing"

    I'm married, and I don't do that
    (anymore).
    This would be fine for you perhaps - and by the way - all of you gals and guys are welcome/invited to come Tube the Salt River !

    http://www.saltrivertubing.com/

    Find waterflow data here:
    http://waterdata.usgs.gov/az/nwis/uv?09502000

    If the waterflow is less than 750 cubic feet per second. Don't go. It's too slow. Anything over 950 cfs is Good, over 1100 cfs is Great !
    Wear TENNIS SHOES !, not flip flops or expensive sandals.
    No Glass Containers allowed - they're against the law.

    Yes, a small percentage of the women are topless by the time they have passed under the Blue Point bridge, but not many are so unencumbered as they pass my rocky outcropping. It's too close to the starting point for drugs to have taken effect. There's another outcropping just downstream of the bridge where I've helped then "buck the wind" - which pushes Tubers back towards Globe (upriver) - and find the current that'll pull them towards Yuma (downriver). Plenty of topless Ladies there. I prefer to help them miss the rocks.
     
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