I have always been curious about the male bisexual mind. They're enigma to most gay men. Yes, I know this can be a politically charged topic and people are very defensive about the existence of the bisexual male, but I'm actually asking with sincerity and actual curiosity.
I don't know if I've ever met more than a two who openly identified as bi -- and one of them definitely said he was feeling less attracted to women as he got more comfortable being gay. The other, I felt was just having trouble coming out (for specific reasons I won't share, not because I don't believe in bisexuality.)
As a gay guy, I'm always wished i could be legit bisexual. For one, I didn't dislike women, but I just always knew in my heart of hearts I just got turned on by men. Even before I knew what "turned on" or "gay" meant, I knew--because it wasn't exclusively about sex. It was also manner, outlook, sensibility, behavior. Physically, I was also fascinated by men's bodies and kind of indifferent to women's. I had no interest in the stuff that seemed to interest other boys -- like football. As I matured, when I closed my eyes to masturbate, I always pictured naked men. I just got hard when I saw one. It was autonomic. I had secret crushes on guys in school, occasionally a girl but that almost felt forced. Even though I was always called a "faggot" by jocks and so forth, I occasionally dated girls, and even had a girlfriend in high school for a while. I tried to say I was bi for a while because I felt it was somehow "not as bad" as being a full-fledged faggot. Eventually, in college I found I no longer get hard when I was making out with women, so I dropped the pretense.
But for people that really are bi men, what's it like?
So I know the answers won't be universal, but there must be a cluster of basic shared experiences for bi guys.
For instance, when you're alone and close your eyes to jerk off, what comes to mind if you're a bisexual men--a man or a woman or both.
Do you check out both genders on the street? (Call it a stereotype, but I sure notice every hot man on the street, and I know straight men sure like to look at pretty women.) Or do you find that you like transwomen?
Who did you have a crush on in high school? How aware were you of your bisexual side?
Do you find yourself flirting with both sexes?
Do you get hard for a man the same way as a woman? (I've seen bisexual porn and it's always lame. At least one of the guys can't get it up, and there's usually zero chemistry between the actors.)
Do you "present" to world as straight?
Do you fall in love with men and women the same way with both?
What about non-sexual part of a relationship -- "spending your life together" and "planning a common future," the part of sexual identity that's more about intimacy than physical sex: what's that like for you when you think of a partner?
Do you consider yourself bi because you were married to a woman and had kids before coming out?
I don't know if I've ever met more than a two who openly identified as bi -- and one of them definitely said he was feeling less attracted to women as he got more comfortable being gay. The other, I felt was just having trouble coming out (for specific reasons I won't share, not because I don't believe in bisexuality.)
As a gay guy, I'm always wished i could be legit bisexual. For one, I didn't dislike women, but I just always knew in my heart of hearts I just got turned on by men. Even before I knew what "turned on" or "gay" meant, I knew--because it wasn't exclusively about sex. It was also manner, outlook, sensibility, behavior. Physically, I was also fascinated by men's bodies and kind of indifferent to women's. I had no interest in the stuff that seemed to interest other boys -- like football. As I matured, when I closed my eyes to masturbate, I always pictured naked men. I just got hard when I saw one. It was autonomic. I had secret crushes on guys in school, occasionally a girl but that almost felt forced. Even though I was always called a "faggot" by jocks and so forth, I occasionally dated girls, and even had a girlfriend in high school for a while. I tried to say I was bi for a while because I felt it was somehow "not as bad" as being a full-fledged faggot. Eventually, in college I found I no longer get hard when I was making out with women, so I dropped the pretense.
But for people that really are bi men, what's it like?
So I know the answers won't be universal, but there must be a cluster of basic shared experiences for bi guys.
For instance, when you're alone and close your eyes to jerk off, what comes to mind if you're a bisexual men--a man or a woman or both.
Do you check out both genders on the street? (Call it a stereotype, but I sure notice every hot man on the street, and I know straight men sure like to look at pretty women.) Or do you find that you like transwomen?
Who did you have a crush on in high school? How aware were you of your bisexual side?
Do you find yourself flirting with both sexes?
Do you get hard for a man the same way as a woman? (I've seen bisexual porn and it's always lame. At least one of the guys can't get it up, and there's usually zero chemistry between the actors.)
Do you "present" to world as straight?
Do you fall in love with men and women the same way with both?
What about non-sexual part of a relationship -- "spending your life together" and "planning a common future," the part of sexual identity that's more about intimacy than physical sex: what's that like for you when you think of a partner?
Do you consider yourself bi because you were married to a woman and had kids before coming out?
