What's more emotional: A Kiss or Sex?

[vergax]

For me it has become all about the whole combo of sex/kissing/talking/joking, when is with a person i love.
If it is someone i only want as my "lover" (that adjective should be changed for me) then in the last few years, I have or not kissed at ALL or just the bare minimum to get the sexual encounter going.

Being a very cold, non-physical person during everyday's activities, most women i get intimately connected, get surprised how intimate, intense and warm i can be during sex, because i kiss a lot.

Whereas with "just sex partners", even if i know women love to be kissed, i just can't do it too much.

Conclussion: a real kiss is more intimate than sex IMO, besides, passionately kissing gets me harder and more excited.

 

[D_Edwin Eatser]

My wife and I swing, and some swingers won't kiss as they think it too intimate. They save that for their lovers. We don't agree. kissing is an important part of sex and we think it should be included.

Having said that, kissing is fantastic. I spent hours french kissing a girl when we were both 12 and have never forgotten it. it somehow seems more memorable that my first hurried fuck.

 

[deleted639306]

This I'm noticing, is a deep thought that most people do play with in their heads, but find very difficult to express in words. Thing is you can sort of rearrange peoples posts in your head where it seems to be much easier to understand.

Even when the kiss is with someone I've just met, say on a night out, I will still get a much better feeling than if I was to have sex with someone. Moreover, when you finish a kiss, you feel warm, loved, alive. After sex, to me unless it is someone I deeply feel for I get a feeling of emptiness.

Like I said I think one is much more in the passion of the moment when hormones have spiked whereas the other is that much desired feeling of loving and being loved, the knowledge you are not lonely and people do feel for you.

On the other hand, it could just be the alcohol for me anyway haha.

@ Ms Temptress, bring it on
@subgirrl... I meant tell them not think, but I couldn't edit it when I noticed it. My mind tends to make strange typos that end up being the wrong phrase entirely. P.S. I love your profile pic, is that you?

I would be delighted to. you're a real sweetheart arent you? :smile:

Yea, kissing included in sex is very intimate, I'd say. It turns me on so much more to see in porn where the couple are kissing each other. it looks like they are so much more into each other and i love it.

 

[_Jonesy]

For me it has become all about the whole combo of sex/kissing/talking/joking, when is with a person i love.
If it is someone i only want as my "lover" (that adjective should be changed for me) then in the last few years, I have or not kissed at ALL or just the bare minimum to get the sexual encounter going.

Being a very cold, non-physical person during everyday's activities, most women i get intimately connected, get surprised how intimate, intense and warm i can be during sex, because i kiss a lot.

Wow, that really does sound like me, especially now. I believe that sort of passion heightens sex, especially for the woman as it is quite a deep psychological experience as well. They love the gentle touch and eye contact as much as an orgasm in some instances.

Right now it is near impossible for a girl to get close to me. They don't even try as I come across so blockaded to protect my emotions, but what I need, truly, is a girl who wants me so much she will fight to gain those emotions and for that I would love her all the more. But that isn't realistic is it, even if I do show them I do like them, I would still be distant for the beginning.

During sex the other side of me tends to come out though, and it can shine at times how caring/loving I can be.

@Freyasfolk

I would agree with the swingers who choose not to. My heart takes a bigger plunge if I see a girl I like kissing a guy properly, than if they were just fucking them. Both wouldn't be nice experiences for me, but I do think sex is just playtime.

Sorry if I can't reply to everybody, I'm trying my best

 

[MsThang]

If I don't want to kiss you then I will not want to have sex with you. The two must go together. I do not need a deep, emotional bond with someone to kiss them or have sex with them, however, I need to be attracted to them. Of course, kissing and sex with someone you care about makes a difference, there is an intimacy, a trust that allows a person to be more open and lose all inhibitions. The best sex I ever had was with someone who was big but I was also in a LTR. So I am never sure if it's because of his size or because he just really knew me and what I liked sexually.

 

[B_subgirrl]

After sex, to me unless it is someone I deeply feel for I get a feeling of emptiness.

I find this kind of sad (even though I think kissing is more intimate than sex). Maybe you're sort of expecting sex to lead to a special connected feeling, so when it doesn't you feel empty?
How I feel after sex just depends on how well he's fucked me. I do get an additional warm fuzzy feeling if I actually care about the person, but I get that from spending time with them - it doesn't have to be a sexual encounter.

Wow, that really does sound like me, especially now. I believe that sort of passion heightens sex, especially for the woman as it is quite a deep psychological experience as well. They love the gentle touch and eye contact as much as an orgasm in some instances.

Touch me gently and I'm likely to scream in frustration. And eye contact is rather like kissing - great if I care about him, too intimate if I don't.

(Because of this, forced eye contact is a great way to Dom me. Eye contact during sex makes me feel more naked than taking my clothes off does).

 

[nicenycdick]

Kissing is much more intimate. And if the kissing isn't great, neither is the sex. I have never had a good sexual experience with someone who could not kiss well. It is my first prerequisite. And maybe I am old-fashioned, but I prefer to spend a good amount of time kissing before having sex with someone...nothing beats the build-up!

 

[ericbythebay]

It depends on the context and the person. I kiss most of my friends, but I've only had sex with half of them.

 

[_Jonesy]

I find this kind of sad (even though I think kissing is more intimate than sex). Maybe you're sort of expecting sex to lead to a special connected feeling, so when it doesn't you feel empty?
How I feel after sex just depends on how well he's fucked me. I do get an additional warm fuzzy feeling if I actually care about the person, but I get that from spending time with them - it doesn't have to be a sexual encounter.

It's true I would rather have someone close and important to me - that's just who I am. I don't think casual sex is for me, unless like you say, it could lead somewhere else. As for one night stands, if that's what it is then usually it is amazing. But after I still feel a bit like... why did I just do that?

I suppose I'm just a big softie who wants to be loved hah.

 

[B_subgirrl]

It's true I would rather have someone close and important to me - that's just who I am. I don't think casual sex is for me, unless like you say, it could lead somewhere else. As for one night stands, if that's what it is then usually it is amazing. But after I still feel a bit like... why did I just do that?

I suppose I'm just a big softie who wants to be loved hah.

You're a sweetheart, honey :smile::tongue:.

Sex for me is really just sex. I want to be fucking the person who is best in bed. I would prefer it if I could be close to them AND they're the best in bed, but best in bed is really most important to me for the sex itself.

 

[_Jonesy]

You're a sweetheart, honey :smile::tongue:.

Sex for me is really just sex. I want to be fucking the person who is best in bed. I would prefer it if I could be close to them AND they're the best in bed, but best in bed is really most important to me for the sex itself.

There is always that as well, maybe I've never had a girl who is decent in bed. It usually does become quite boring no matter what I do

 

[B_subgirrl]

P.S. I love your profile pic, is that you?

I forgot to reply to this bit earlier :redface:. Unfortunately it isn't me, but I love it too! The reasoning behind the choice is in this thread:

http://www.lpsg.org/219725-quest-for-an-avatar.html

There is always that as well, maybe I've never had a girl who is decent in bed. It usually does become quite boring no matter what I do

Oh, that's even more sad!!! But you're still young, so there's hope for you yet :tongue:. I was around 18, maybe 19 before I found my sexual vibe (although I'd like to think I wasn't boring before that!).

 

[MsThang]

Kissing is much more intimate. And if the kissing isn't great, neither is the sex. I have never had a good sexual experience with someone who could not kiss well. It is my first prerequisite. And maybe I am old-fashioned, but I prefer to spend a good amount of time kissing before having sex with someone...nothing beats the build-up!

Pretty much how I feel.

 

[_Jonesy]

Haha stop saying my life is sad

Yeh I haven't had a huge amount of sexual encounters for the aforementioned reasons; see who I meet. Just need to find a girl who knows what she's doing which is probably why I'm so attracted to women in their 30's

Any takers? haha

 

[HappyBoi]

I'm a bit shocked that almost everyone (if in fact not everyone?) see kissing as more intimate than sex. I'm.. more of the other way around. I've always been a very hugging type of person, as well as kissing although that doesn't happen that often with friends. Sex.. well, then I have to give my whole body to someone else, I have to expose my entire being and let them in close and be a part of me (not the naughty way, well, yes, but not what I really meant.. :tongue. With kissing, sure, you expose yourself as well, and it's also intimate, but I see sex as a much.. deeper physical activity. :smile: Maybe it's because I'm almost a virgin and haven't f*cked around so much.. :redface:

Haha stop saying my life is sad

Yeh I haven't had a huge amount of sexual encounters for the aforementioned reasons; see who I meet. Just need to find a girl who knows what she's doing which is probably why I'm so attracted to women in their 30's

Any takers? haha

Or a guy. :tongue:

 

[ArtofDesire]

For me a long, lingering kiss with someone I care about deeply is much more erotic and sensual than sex. A kiss can be more intimate, more powerful in many ways. Unlike many of the other posters I will not kiss someone on the mouth unless I feel a strong emotional connection because for me kissing is the ultimate intimacy, sort of like sharing your soul.

I have no words to adequately express the feeling I get kissing a man that I love or am emotionally connected to. There's a heat to the passion that makes me want to crawl inside and become one with him and it almost always leads to fantastic sex either immediately, or leaves me anticipating the sex to come in a way that makes it almost impossible to put the thought away at times.

Sex with someone I care about is extremely satisfying and rewarding, but on those rare occasions that I have hooked up with someone I barely knew I too was less than satisfied and feeling somewhat empty afterwards even though technically the sex act itself may have been very good. It's really the emotional bond that does it for me and I can get way more turned on and hyper-sexual kissing a man that I love than I can through genital stimulation. I guess I'm just someone who needs that emotional connection.

 

[Vainglorious]

For me I've always felt that I had an element of choice in both - they can both be as intimate or as perfunctory as you want them to be. But I suppose that's only true if you're kissing or making love with someone with whom you have real chemistry and emotional intimacy already. If there's not a lot to the relationship between the people in the first place, I don't consider either really emotionally intimate. I love to be teased and made to wait with lots of kissing, which can still be done with someone I don't particularly love, and the sex can still be very passionate; but if you're looking for soulful connection, there has to be something else there, even if it's temporary. With someone you're intimate with outside of sex and kissing, you can choose how connected you want to feel through what you're doing.

 

[B_thickjohnny]

Quote: "Kissing is much more intimate. And if the kissing isn't great, neither is the sex. I have never had a good sexual experience with someone who could not kiss well. It is my first prerequisite. And maybe I am old-fashioned, but I prefer to spend a good amount of time kissing before having sex with someone...nothing beats the build-up!"

Not sure who said that but it's so true.

 

[kracker52]

I seldom kiss a guy I don't have feelings for,..but fucking is not an issue, thats not a emotional need for me

 

[deleted639306]

Haha stop saying my life is sad

Yeh I haven't had a huge amount of sexual encounters for the aforementioned reasons; see who I meet. Just need to find a girl who knows what she's doing which is probably why I'm so attracted to women in their 30's

Any takers? haha

:frown1:
I am not experienced and I'm not in my 30's. damn.