im asking this in a specific circumstance. from a few experiances and observations. If you have ever been in a relationship where all of a sudden you are unsure what you want, do you be honest and say "im not sure what i want, lets take a break till I figure it out" or do you not say a thing, Carry on as usual and wait till you know? i spoke about this with a friend, and they said it might be hard to put effort in to continue as normal, whereas i say they shouldnt be selfish and they should put themselves through the "shit" of making effort rather than hurting someone for what could be no reason. Another circumstance, which is ongoing with someone i know and i cannot make my mind up is, if you dont love someone but they love you. this person wont leave the guy because they are scared and from what i know of them, they need the comfort and support of someone. From what i know, the guy is unaware anything is wrong. now, do they leave the person as it is unfair to stay with someone whose love is not given back, or should they stay with them untill they are strong enough to leave or till they possibly love them? i guess the basic quesiton is; whats worse? Hurting someone for selfish, but possibly fair reasons, or putting yourself through some shit for the benefit of someone else? i am aware the latter also includes further hurt for the last circumstance.