When does a man become your boyfriend?

Discussion in 'Relationships, Discrimination, and Jealousy' started by rocketred, May 16, 2009.

  1. rocketred

    rocketred New Member

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    All my life, I've basically been bi but have only had relationships with women.

    Now I've been getting close to a guy... we've been fucking on and off (mainly off) for a couple of years but we've been pretty intensive for the past 6/7 weeks. We've spent time at each other's place, I've met his friends (and fucked two of them...) and even been away to Amsterdam together.

    I don't want to seem like a pussy by asking "where we're at"... but I've never done this before. Plus it's strange because I'm not openly bi and so have to keep him underwraps which is... odd.

    All I know is - he's a great lad, hot as hell and a riot in bed. But coming up to two months... that must be something, right?
     
  2. jeff black

    jeff black <img border="0" src="/images/badges/gold_member.gi

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    I'd say it was something. However, if it's bothering you, I suggest you open up to him. There is nothing wrong with being honest.

    Tell him you've been having a great time, and you're just curious what you should refer to him as when you are talking about him with friends.
     
  3. BigD_2

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    Yeah two months is certainly something.

    It's always a little odd to have The Talk, but now it sounds like time. You are probably both actually wondering similar things - wondering, essentially, "Where is this going?" It's best to get the discussion started. Good luck.

    So far as when he becomes your "boyfriend" or when you are "dating" - those terms are used loosely by a lot of people and mean so many different things to different people they are kind of meaningless. Someone I know said he was dating this guy and I was like, oh, when did that happen, how long have you known him? and he goes, a week. Um, well, I don't use "dating" to mean that...but then, that's me.

    It's less about what you "call it" than about both of you feeling comfortable with what it "is."
     
  4. QuiteOne

    QuiteOne New Member

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    The first thing you need to do is "come out" and reveal your true sexual nature to those that are important to you. Next you need to be honest with yourself. What do YOU want? If you want to pursue a relationship with this guy, then tell him. All you're going to do by keeping secrets and holding back is give yourself an ulcer or high blood pressure.

    Just be who YOU are and be honest and open to those you care about. Communication is an amazing thing.
     
  5. BigDallasDick8x6

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    A guy becomes my boyfriend when he proves he can get pounded hard for 2 to 3 hours a night. But enough about me......

    The fact that you met his friends is good. That shows he's making you part of his life. The fact that you fucked two of them -- not so sure. Was that with his consent? Were they truly friends of his or just fuck buddies? It maybe hard for him to think of you as a boyfriend if you're fucking other guys also. I guess I'd have to know what your definition of boyfriend is, what you think his definition of boyfriend is, what went on in Amsterdam, etc.
     
  6. joeweekend

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    How much do you want to be with him - not sexually, but just to be with him?

    Answer that, and you'll have your answer.
     
  7. B_Hung Jon

    B_Hung Jon New Member

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    a guy becomes your b/f when you start wearing each other's clothes. It's the same with a girl, except she'll start wearing your shirts with nothing under it around the house.
     
  8. rsparky

    rsparky Member

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    my thoughts exactly!
     
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