When is Bullying Cool?

Discussion in 'Relationships, Discrimination, and Jealousy' started by exwhyzee, Oct 12, 2010.

  1. exwhyzee

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    Recently, many of us in the United States have a heightened awareness of bullying...especially in terms of young people who, in some cases, have committed suicide in reaction. It's fair to say that a national dialog is ongoing in this country regarding the phenomenon of bullying on a level never seen before.

    In contrast to this new-found sensitivity, some members of this site can be seen seeking-out humiliation, submissiveness, or domination...traits that are often components of bullying. Consider some scenarios:

    1) A young guy grew up in an athletic and male-dominated environment in which size and strength were valued instead of his artistic and expressive characteristics. Even though his dick is normal in size, he seeks out humiliating comments from bigger males about his size. The more belittling, insulting, or abusive the comments, the more aroused he becomes.

    2) A young women grew up in a school with few friends, and in the context of being verbally and physically abused by classmates. After receiving a dog collar as a gift from a guy she meets, she wears it as an outward sign that she is desired. In fact, she enjoys the feeling of being owned by a man so much that when other males speak with her, he angrily states that she has a boyfriend and she has no interest in speaking to others.

    3) A married couple invites a dominant male into their bed. The husband assumes the role of a cuck; the invited male takes the part of a bull. The bull fucks the wife in front of the cuck, and forces him to listen to her humiliating comments. The bull verbally abuses the husband's manhood and worth, and engages in other humiliating acts such as ejaculating on the cuck's pillow and forcing him on to the floor.

    To many in mainstream society, the actions solicited by these individuals could constitute bullying, humiliation, or even torture. For example, many young men seek out assurances related to adequacy of their dick size, and would find insults and derogatory comments painful. Many young women who assert the equality of both genders, would be angered if any man gave them a dog collar and insinuated they not speak to other males. Finally, many couples work hard to develop a nurturing bond that involves respect and love...ideals that are not plainly demonstrated in cuckoldry.

    At what point are sexual fetishes harmful to people? Are these individuals being drawn deeper into a psycho-sexual disorder, or are they simply expressing interests specific to their own development and personal history?

    Does it matter the intent of the aggressor? Does it matter what those around them experience (a guy with a normal size dick hearing from a side conversation that his 5 1/2" dick is "tiny")?

    Is indulgence of these fetishes simply healthy role playing and fantasy, or is the humiliation just an invited form of bullying that is harmful to the victim's emotional health in the long run?
     
  2. biguy8773

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  3. D_Hammond Happydipper

    D_Hammond Happydipper Account Disabled

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    Yea i had a problum with bullying in Elementary


    but when middle school came around no one fucked with me

    nor high school probably @ 220 at the time(did not look like it)



    good thing I am not loosing any muscle mass when getting leaner..
     
  4. MASSIVEPKGO_CHUCK

    MASSIVEPKGO_CHUCK Well-Known Member

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    BULLYING IS NEVER COOL.:irked:
     
  5. Bbucko

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    As a kid who was bullied in school and who later in life became a dominant top (with all the prerequisite BDSM/extreme sex baggage that term implies), I've never put the two together before. On the other hand, I recognize how the sexual abuse I suffered as an adolescent has absolutely affected my sexuality; some things cannot be unlearned.

    But it's a stretch, in my mind, to equate school-age bullying with sexual abuse. Perhaps the taunts and violence I endured from 5th through 10th grade (when they seemed to have stopped, for me) did have some effect on me. I know that they helped shape how I viewed the world and my place in it in a social way; my identity as an outsider/pariah was absolutely established by then. But I cannot see the correlation between that and my propensity for rough sex.

    Further, the cliché of the bully being the victim of domestic violence has almost always run true: rough kids tend to come from rough homes. And though I'm sure many bullies outgrow their hateful school personas and become regular members of society, I'm also sure that those blow-hards who rob rooms of oxygen simply by their presence (or the insufferable, bitter bitches who live to put everyone in their places) started their careers as bullies.

    The last thing I'll say is that, though some may find my sexual appetites disturbing, there's nothing inherently sick to it. My overwhelming principle is consent; bullies, by their very nature despise the concept of consent. I do not recognize my fetishes as signs of my being "damaged": sorry :rolleyes:
     
  6. exwhyzee

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    What's the difference between humiliation and bullying? Obviously, humiliation might be solicited and bullying unsolicited...but...are they related? They might be delivered and received in different ways, but is the message the same: A has less worth than B?
     
  7. exwhyzee

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    That's a fair statement and your last line is an important distinction. I do not consider anyone damaged, but was stating two polar opposites in order to define a possible range of ideas...neither having more weight than the other. I really am curious about where this discussion leads...if I participate in SPH, for example, I really feel guilty for it.
     
  8. piercedjobbie

    piercedjobbie New Member

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    Bullying is not cool. Nor is it warm.
     
  9. D_Myer_Dogasflees

    D_Myer_Dogasflees New Member

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    In the bed room, when ur receiving deep beating monstercock pleasure from it./ when he whips you with his penis. (and nobody is married, unless there is somekind of agreemment, where you will be mentally stimiulated by it, while she/he enjoys it too) Only then

    i can't see how somebody could derive pleasure from hurting just any other, it makes no sense to me, such people are unnatural/ there is something wrong with them mentally , or they are just ass wipes who don't respect even their own existance.
     
    #9 D_Myer_Dogasflees, Oct 12, 2010
    Last edited: Oct 12, 2010
  10. bigbull29

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    Getting bullied is not the same as enjoyfully consenting to humiliation during sex.

    I was called gay so much in high school that I thought I was going to lose my mind. It's scarred me in so many ways. And often in front of the teachers who did nothing.

    If you have to resort to calling another boy "gay" to feel powerful or superior, you're a sad case.
     
  11. Big_Red

    Big_Red Active Member

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    I don't know if it's the right question, but the difference between bullying and not bullying is consent. If it's unwanted and whoever being bullied asks the bully to stop and they don't, then that's obviously bullying.
     
  12. Bbucko

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    I have played with several "humiliation bottoms" but really am unaware of their histories going back to childhood. I do know that they become genuinely, intensely aroused by being degraded or humiliated (especially in public); they were always cooking up scenarios, most of which were really kinda far-fetched (they tend to not be very creative, either). In these contexts, it's my role to find "the real" in the scenario and bring it to life.

    Some guys really do get off on being paddled and/or flogged (or strangled, for that matter). I happen to find delivering these activities very erotic, too. But for someone who over-analyzes things as much as I do, I've never really gone further than, again, recognizing the obvious pattern of transference between the (completely non-consensual and unwelcome) sexual abuse I suffered as a kid to my eventual adoption of (and comfort with) a dominant role. It's actually the healthiest way of having processed what I went through, IMO.

    One dynamic you seem to not understand is that it's the bottom, not the top, who's actually in charge during extreme sex. It's the bottom who (in nearly all cases) sets the limits and boundaries. Anything else voids consent and turns in abuse, which I have no interest in doing at all ever.
     
  13. silvertriumph2

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    My definition of Bullying is of actions that are not asked for nor wanted.
    Therefore.....I believe it is NEVER justified nor is it ever Cool.
     
    #13 silvertriumph2, Oct 12, 2010
    Last edited: Oct 12, 2010
  14. tgirlsrgreat

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    you sir, are an idiot!! and i have no problum saying that!
     
  15. rob_

    rob_ Active Member

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    This thread is very enjoyful.
     
  16. Bbucko

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    I got the "damaged" bit from this:

    I practice the peculiar art of Small Penis Worship, not Humiliation, though I find plenty of other ways of erotic punishment :cool: For instance, I really enjoy C&BT, though, again, only within the safety zone of consent.
     
  17. _Edu

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    NEVEEER!!!
    I think that a person who is a bully, is screaming for attention or at the other hand, is crazy; because personally, I dont percieve a real benefit when it comes to humilliate people... And the person who is the "victim" (this may sound heartless) is because of weakness; he/she wants it...

    In my persoal experience I've never been bullied, even tho I'm skinny and have good grades at school (almost the perfect combo to get bullied) but to balance that I have a very strong personality (and I dont really have the nerd steriotype), I really know how to defend myself and my ideas, so theres not really a physicall disadvantage if u know how to use your brain.

    & with the sexual fetishes, well, everyone has their dirty little secret; altough in my opinion, beign humillated in anyway is not cool... period. ;)
     
  18. exwhyzee

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    I know I'm a sexual neophyte in so many ways...and there is a whole world out there! I don't even know what C&BT is...google wasn't very helpful :)
     
  19. D_Hammond Happydipper

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    you do not want my fist plowing into your face ? :argue: :fight:
     
  20. Bbucko

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    Here ya go :biggrin1:
     
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