when is violence towards your partner OK?

[nicenycdick]

Self Defense. War. Store Bought Pasta Sauce.

I think that about does it...

 

[B_crackoff]

When they are trying to kill your sub - adult - child - that's unfathomably fine.

I've checked with Yin, I've checked with Yan, Jesus, Buddha, & Dawkins. They say cool - beat the crap outta the piece of shit, & use their entrails for a meaty tapestry on the repugnance of infanticide.

The rest is just opinion.

 

[B_625girth]

only in absolutely necessary self-defense, and in proportion to the danger to you

I also agree.

I know a guy from the bar I hang out in, and he thinks it's okay to knock the old lady around every once in awhile. apparently, his 2 ex-wives don't agree. actually, the first time he said this I was shocked cuz you just didn't figure him for this. but I have heard him say this a couple times.

 

[askew]

Only in self defense if necessary.

 

[Smallprivate]

Can be a twisted turn on,the rush...if both parties are into it.

 

[Gecko4lif]

When she has a weapon. Im fine about letting a woman hit me but when there are foreign object involved chivalry goes out the window. Protecting numero uno is the prime directive.

 

[AlteredEgo]

Self Defense. War. Store Bought Pasta Sauce.

I think that about does it...

Just a swat on the tush if she uses canned tomatoes in addition to fresh ones to save time.

 

[B_Lightkeeper]

Never. Period. The end. Unless she was pointing a gun at you.

Add to that "unless he was pointing a gun at you."
Works both ways. :frown1:

 

[HungThickProf]

I don't believe that violence in a relationship is ever okay. The moment your partner decides to put their hands on you, or vice versa, your relationship is over. I understand that such issues can be worked out, don't get me wrong. But once you say it's okay, then you're crossing a line which could lead to escalation. If two people are in a relationship and a simple slap is tolerated, and the behavior continues, then it's only a matter of time before that slap becomes a fist.

So in my opinion- if someone put their hands on you, you need to get out of the situation, and find someone who won't. Because that person can no longer use their words.

 

[nudeyorker]

That is very well put Dante and although I did not express that in my post in this thread I had foolishly considered it a given in the conversation.

 

[nicenycdick]

Just a swat on the tush if she uses canned tomatoes in addition to fresh ones to save time.

Hell, canned Italian Plum Tomatoes are OK as long as you are making your own sauce...just don't every serve me Ragu or I might snap.

 

[nudeyorker]

Hell, canned Italian Plum Tomatoes are OK as long as you are making your own sauce...just don't every serve me Ragu or I might snap.

Here you go... enjoy!

Tomato Sauce
In a large skillet on med heat 3 TBL olive oil, 1/4 cup finely chopped parsley, 1 med red onion finely chopped 3 TBL finely chopped cilantro , simmer until onions are golden. add two cloves of finely minced garlic and 1/2 cup fresh basil.
You can either cook in a stock pot...but I use a slow cooker...
2 1/2 pounds peeled seeded tomatoes coarsely chopped. 1 TBL tomato paste, salt and pepper to taste, ( I add a whole peeled potato to catch the acid).I put everything in a slow cooker for about 7 hours. When finished, remove the potato and throw it away) put the mixture in a food processor or blender and puree. You can keep this in the refrigerator for 4 days or freeze for up to three months.

 

[luka82]

Here you go... enjoy!

Tomato Sauce
In a large skillet on med heat 3 TBL olive oil, 1/4 cup finely chopped parsley, 1 med red onion finely chopped 3 TBL finely chopped cilantro , simmer until onions are golden...

What happens with the taste if they are not simmered until golden? Is the caramelization the thing that makes it tasty?

 

[nudeyorker]

What happens with the taste if they are not simmered until golden? Is the caramelization the thing that makes it tasty?

I honestly don't know. I always cook onions until golden brown or longer to caramelize, or use them raw.

 

[luka82]

I honestly don't know. I always cook onions until golden brown or longer to caramelize, or use them raw.

K, had to ask because i just let them simmer for a bit.
Thanks! :smile:

 

[nicenycdick]

K, had to ask because i just let them simmer for a bit.
Thanks! :smile:

You must cook the onions until translucent to soften them...they don't need to be carmelized (not that is hurts, of course.) And the only time I add a potato, Nudie, is if I burn the sauce because I believe it absorbs some of the good taste as well. If you start with good fresh or canned roma tomatoes, you should have no bitterness. And I add oregano (a must!) and never use cilantro unless I'm making chili (which starts with the same recipe.) Otherwise, your recipe is the same as what I learned from my mother and have cooked for more than (gasp!) 50 years. What has always amazed me is that this same basic recipe tastes so different when my aunts or siblings make it. One of the mysteries of cooking...

 

[Devils_Haircut]

If she leaves the kitchen.

If my beer is warm.

If my sandwich isn't on time.

^^^^^^^^^
I joke I joke, emm violence is only okay as self defense, I'm pretty sure thats the rule of using violence against anyone.

 

[Intrigue]

Violence is a touchy subject. It is Never OK. Sometimes it is necessary to protect yourself but other than that it shouldn't be done. I'm no saint. I've been in relationships where I was repeatedly hit and told it was nothing and to get over it. I fucking HATE being touched by anyone whom I don't know and never in anger by someone I do. That being said I've lost my temper before and put a hole in a wall or pushed someone off of me. Anger management and therapy are pretty helpful. That and ending that particular relationship.Dante was right, once the hitting starts it means words are gone. But like AE said I've retaliated when pushed to a hysterical state and when I've come back down I immediately regret what has happened. For some people they can't control themselves once it has escalated to a certain point. Its up to that person and the person they are with to judge when the line was crossed. For instance, childhood traumas brought to the surface by physical contact can make a person hysterical and do things they wouldn't normally do. In that case I'm not saying its ok but I'm not going to get mad if a woman hits me because i somehow brought back a memory. She's more hurt than me. But like Gecko said, if my partner comes at me with a knife then its lights out. Knock away knife, choke hold, call 911. End o story.

 

[B_Hung Jon]

You must cook the onions until translucent to soften them...they don't need to be carmelized (not that is hurts, of course.) And the only time I add a potato, Nudie, is if I burn the sauce because I believe it absorbs some of the good taste as well. If you start with good fresh or canned roma tomatoes, you should have no bitterness. And I add oregano (a must!) and never use cilantro unless I'm making chili (which starts with the same recipe.) Otherwise, your recipe is the same as what I learned from my mother and have cooked for more than (gasp!) 50 years. What has always amazed me is that this same basic recipe tastes so different when my aunts or siblings make it. One of the mysteries of cooking...

I asked my mom about this and she said to cook the sauce all day. But don't burn it.

 

[invisibleman]

Q: "When is violence towards your partner OK?"--Dolfette

A: It isn't okay. But if anyone finds themselves that frustrated and angry...they got to break up.