When She Is Bigger Than You

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littlbigguy: Here's a simple topic that I don't think has been broached on any thread so far: how do you feel when a girl is bigger than you are?  I clearly don't mean by this that her clit is bigger than your dick but that she is taller and/or her overall body size is greater than yours.

I'm a relatively small guy (5'8", 145 lb) but an example of good things (over  9.5x 6.5) coming in small packages.  I have always dated girls distinctly shorter and more petite than myself.  My current gf , however, is around 5'10" or 5'11" and as well is more broadly boned than I am. (She's attractively built, by the way.)She became enamored of me very quickly for the important things, my mind and looks and personality.  From my side it has taken more time to fall in a like way for her, but this does seem to be happening now, slowly but surely.  It's not a case where I instantly "fell in love" (which would have been easier) but rather a case where I at first couldn't resist her love and only in turn am responding to that love in kind (a far more subtle experience, and in terms of personal growth probably a more valuable one too). From the start, she's been also highly turned on by my body.  After the inevitable big  dick "surprise" was sprung, this made my body only hotter to her, and she loves to be all over it and me at just about any time of day.  Sex itself has entailed less of the size adjustment process than I've known before, and the sex became mutually satisfying from early on.

The problem is this: when it comes to just plain old  general cuddling and hanging around I still do not feel overall as comfortable with her body as with a female body that  I can "take in my arms" with more of me than her to spare. There isn't any deep "adequacy" issue here, as she tells me over and over (and means it, and I believe it) that to her I am "more of a man" (in totality, not just one coincidental thing) than she has known before or would ever expect to find. But the overall body size disparity still lingers as an unresolved aesthetic comfort zone issue for me. I know that a lot of guys (including some of my friends, from what they say) find taller women a turn on, but alas for me I just don't seem to be among the ones who's "wired" that way.   Do any of you guys and women have anything to share on this?

 

[D_Martin van Burden]

[quote author=littlbigguy link=board=meetgreet;num=1039241910;start=0#0 date=12/06/02 at 22:18:30]There isn't any deep "adequacy" issue here, as she tells me over and over (and means it, and I believe it) that to her I am "more of a man" (in totality, not just one coincidental thing) than she has known before or would ever expect to find. But the overall body size disparity still lingers as an unresolved aesthetic comfort zone issue for me.[/quote]

Well, let's face it, man, you're probably finished growing in the height-sense and there's little to be done about that, unless you start wearing the high heels and drinking smoothies on a more-than-regular basis.

I looked at your post, thinking that if it's just an aesthetic sensibility as opposed to some deep-rooted insecurity or an insurmountable problem with your relationship, then you're one of the lucky ones. Your issue will resolve itself if you simply make it of less importance. You seem more than pleased with your girlfriend and she's obviously into you and makes it known by helping to assauge your concern -- I'm thinking the "more of a man" line is incredibly funny, but still...

From personal experience, I've always dated shorter girls. I'm only 5'10", which isn't really that tall either -- pretty average. Only exception was the boyfriend of late; he's a couple of inches taller and a slight bit heavier. When hugging him, he was definitely a broad fit for my arms. I can't say I ever felt insecure at him being bigger than me bodywise. I didn't think of the sweet payback in being better endowed (his was average). Honestly... I felt my boost of reassurance whenever he would lay his head on my chest.

Whatever the case, I think your best bet is to let this issue die off slowly. It's so incredibly unimportant and, at best, reflects your passive involvement in contextual and infiltrative gender issues -- that "the man" should be taller, bigger, more physically authoritative. You're doing fine, man. Just let it be and treat her right. That's more than enough for her.

 

[Max]

[quote author=littlbigguy link=board=meetgreet;num=1039241910;start=0#0 date=12/06/02 at 22:18:30]She became enamored of me very quickly for the important things, my mind and looks and personality.  From my side it has taken more time to fall in a like way for her, but this does seem to be happening now, slowly but surely.  It's not a case where I instantly "fell in love" (which would have been easier) but rather a case where I at first couldn't resist her love and only in turn am responding to that love in kind [/quote]

Littlbigguy,

It seems to me that the heart of the matter is in the above quote. There is no doubt at all that from her side, you are more than man enough, and I'm sure that the 9.5+" is a part, but only a "small" part, of that! The question is more about what you feel for her, I think.

Though I am no expert, I think an exactly balanced and simultaneous "falling in love" on both sides has to be pretty unusual. My (limited) experience, for what it's worth, is that I have been slower to know my own feelings, in the context of being fully aware that a girl has already fallen for me, and thus being under some pressure to make my mind up. In one case, although I found it hard to acknowledge it, deep down I knew that I didn't return the love; in another I did ... she's the one I am still married to

I don't think your issue really is the height difference; on that I agree with what Dee has said. But in the end, it has to be about whether there is the spark there for you ... Being admired for all that you are (and not just for your impressive middle leg) is a wonderful feeling in itself, but only you will know, in the end, just how reciprocal the relationship is. But maybe a little time is needed for you to know the answer to that question.

Good luck!

 

[13788]

two_fister: I've only dated one women who was bigger than me.
I'm about 5'11" 190lbs.....this girl was about 6'2" and probably around 170lbs, and she wasn't fat at all she was just a big pretty girl. At first it was kinda strange kissing her 'cause she had to lean down to do it, but after a while it kinda of turned me on to be making out with this giant, pretty, amazon of a women, i will admit that holding hands with her was strange because hers were as big if not bigger than mine, but i got over it, the real funny thing is that she dumped me for her ex, and this guy is about 5'5" 130lbs soaking wet.

 

[13788]

7x6andchg: Littlbigguy-

I agree with everything posted before - my last "girlfriend" (her quotes, not mine) was about 6'1", and I'm 5'8". It was kind of awkward at first, but she did her part to make sure I knew that I was the "man" in the relationship - complimenting my shoulders, chest, etc...in other words, somewhat making up for the height difference by subjugating herself (?). In any event - it takes some getting used to but...if your relationship is based on things other than physical things - it should be strong enough to make it through a height difference.

7x6&c

 

[13788]

FieldRatt9: I'm short at 5'5". With an appendage of 9+ x 6+ I look alittle freakish when walking around a nude beach erect. Doesn't bother me at all. Anyway, a friend of mine set me up with his sis-in-law a few years back. She's 5'11" and slim with nice sized hooters. We didn't hit it off. My lack of tallness turned her off and tuned her out. Since I caught a ride with them that night they were going to drop me off. All had to use my rest room so we took turns. I went last and as I stood there with my half erectness in my hand my "date" walked in. She locked eyes on my pissing member and quickly shut the door. I finished and walked out. I made a statement about knocking when I noticed I was alone. So I stepped back into the bathroom and undressed for a shower. As I started adjusting the temp the curtains opened. There stood my naked "date". My face was in her cleavage. This is what she said... "I'm sorry about the boring date but I'm going to make it up to you." I fell in love that night. She could handle every inch I had. It was a great weekend. She never returned my calls. I was used but I recovered. I haven't dated a tall woman since.