White Snake Moan

Discussion in 'Relationships, Discrimination, and Jealousy' started by facetious8, Oct 20, 2007.

  1. facetious8

    facetious8 New Member

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    Earlier this year, I fooled around with 2 of my good friends, a girl and a guy. During the process, the girl turns to me and says, "okay, now I wanna see you go down on him..." I tried it for about a minute, and then gave it back to her... I had never done anything like that before, but I found that it sparked my curiosity.

    A few months down the line, me and this same guy friend were hanging at my place havin some drinks, and we started joking about stuff. One thing led to another, and next thing I know, I have this greek god of a man (ivory, chieseled, and gorgeous) naked on my bed, and I'm rimming him to the point of moaning, and then deep throat him until he cums straight down my throat. Mind you, I've never fully done that before (that 3some experience being the first trial), and I couldn't believe I could do that. It was all good tho because he told me he was quite surprised and impressed.:) I think that was possibly the best night of my life... even better than the 3some. After that, we've flirted, rubbed, and kissed a little, but nothing major.

    Since that night, there's been this fire in me, and I feel it any time I think about him, talk to him, or see him... especially see him. I feel he's seriously brought out a side in me that I didn't know existed. The problem is... he was engaged then... and newly married now... so I told myself that nothing else would happen between us.

    I just have SO much trouble with it because I want it so so so bad... I seriously feel like that girl from Black Snake Moan when she sees a black guy.... that's close to what I feel when it comes to this guy, and it hasn't changed since that night. At one point, I thought I was calming down, but then it all came back to me. The night before he got married, we were outside talking after dinner, and he told me "I'm not gonna stop doing what I'm doing," and basically told me that I will still have opportunities. As wrong as it is, that ignited the fire all over again... I could've jumped on him right then. I'm just trying to stick to what I told myself tho... it's the better thing to do in an already-terrible situation.

    I try to calm the shit down by masturbating, but it's not helping... I now masturbate daily, often multiple times daily... really, any time I think of him, and I've started playin with my ass sometimes when I do it... the urges are just getting more intense. I just don't know what to do. I don't wanna go out and do something stupid, like jump on someone just because I'm so fuckin wound up, or jump on someone who reminds me of him, haha. What's gone on between us was wrong to begin with, so I really don't wanna go to him again, but the urge is there, larger than ever, when he's in mind or in sight, and it just continues to grow.

    Any suggestions??
     
  2. hot-rod

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    Buddy, I think you are N love.
     
  3. hotman911

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    :wank: agrees :adam4:
     
  4. B_Bette

    B_Bette New Member

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    LUST. It's textbook lust. And it always comes back to kick a person in the ass, cos you ignore all of the red flags and go for it. I'm right there, right now, in my own situation.

    There are plenty of guys who think they're straight til they get with another guy. I don't know why this is, but I have to ask - didn't you experiment in childhood? Maybe not. There is that whole het homo-hating culture, and if your dad didn't get to you, maybe your schoolmates did.

    Anyhow, you just have to ask yourself if you want to be part of it or not. If you don't feel held back by the moral/ethical aspects of messing with marrieds, then I suggest you make yourself known, and let him know in subtle ways that you want to be his first choice. He already let you know he's interested in more. If you want to be FIRST IN LINE, let him know.
     
  5. facetious8

    facetious8 New Member

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    No, I never experimented as a child. I know a number of people who talked about doing this & that as a child, but I never did any of that. I really don't know where this came from, but it's definitely brought forth a monster, and I'm not sure of how to tame it. Part of me definitely wants to keep gettin at him... if he's tellin me he won't stop, then why should I? Then the other part of me, the moral part of me, thinks about how it was wrong in the first place, and now that he's married, I don't wanna make it worse. I just don't know.

    As far as the love thing, that made me laugh out loud... thank you. I should think about that. I mean, he's one of my closest college buddies, and we've been through so much together... I love him as a friend, but I don't know what to say about that a more-than-friends type of way. I do find him extremely attractive, to say the least. Then, I don't know that I'd get down with any other guys... I felt comfortable with him, and if I did decide to dabble with some other guy, I'd be thinking of him the entire time... I just know... hell, I'd probably end up callin out his name in the moment, haha!
     
  6. Jayroo

    Jayroo New Member

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    Ennis Del Mar: This is a one-shot thing we got goin' on here.
    Jack Twist: It's nobody's business but ours.
    Ennis Del Mar: You know I ain't queer.
    Jack Twist: Me neither.


    Love is love. Just be honest with yourself and what you really want.
     
  7. Mr Ed in Mass

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    Is he married to the Threesome girl? Maybe they have an open marriage?
     
  8. cgttown

    cgttown Member

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    You either make a decision not to pursue this or you pursue it. Personally, I've found that "it's wrong" isn't very persuasive to my hard on. I do lots of stuff I think is wrong, and I often regret it, but it is what it is.

    Sexual lust is the toughest monster, and the hormonal urge is natural and cannot be denied. Even the forbidden nature of this often makes it MORE attractive, not less. Face it, we're a messed up bunch we people.
     
  9. B_Bette

    B_Bette New Member

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    Yes, but lust has nothing to do with hormones.
     
  10. cgttown

    cgttown Member

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    I didn't say the lust was hormonal. The sexual urge is hormonal, though. The lust is more about the object of the urge. Put them together and they're pretty damn powerful if you ask me.
     
  11. HiJinx

    HiJinx Member

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    Nothing is more powerful than your first sexual awakening experience. I'm surprised that you actually rimmed your first time doing the homo-sex. That usually takes a while. You do sound really hot and uninhibited in the sack.

    Anyway, time heals all things, even insatiable lust. Try a few other guys, not to replace but just for the experience. They will be very lucky guys to hit the hay with you!
     
  12. B_Bette

    B_Bette New Member

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    Yes, lust is a SHADOW function. One does not necessarily have to have sex with the obsession, they might kill that person instead. Therefore, they are not mutually exclusive.
     
  13. facetious8

    facetious8 New Member

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    The more this idea is coming up, the more I wonder about it. I don't think I love him, but maybe I've just been blind to the situation.... ::ponders::
     
  14. facetious8

    facetious8 New Member

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    No, she's not his wife. See the story gets a little deeper....

    The girl we fooled around with is his ex, actually. I think she was in the 3some situation for me, and he was in it for her, and I was in it for the experience. I was always the only guy friend who didn't fall for her, so she wondered why I was never attracted to her like that... and I think she kinda took it as a challenge, and the 3some experience was an open door of opportunity. He and I have had conversations about his this girl (his ex) was probably the most sexually inclined and open-minded girl he's dated, so I think that he wanted to revisit that for a brief moment. I had never looked at either of them like that... we are all good friends from college. That night, I just think that one thing led to another, and we're all really comfortable with each other... she wanted me, he wanted her, and i was open-minded, so shit happened. Crazy thing is, she has a boyfriend, and he had a fiancee... now wife. The fiancee has no idea of anything that's happened during the engagement period. I pretty much know everything that's gone on, even tho I'm part of what's gone on, haha. It's just a terrible situation.
     
  15. facetious8

    facetious8 New Member

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    See, I was surprised too... about the rimming and the deep throating. I just wish you could see this guy tho. Beyond perfect body... very reminiscent of a greek statue. Then, I did it because I know he likes having his ass played with. I wanted him to feel really good, and I wanted to take care of him to the best of my abilities, being unexperienced and all. I guess I just underestimated what I could do... and so did he. He's a good size, so I can't believe I took it all in... AND took it to the throat. I didn't choke once either. I'm still surprised at that one. I seriously feel like it wouldn't have been like that with anyone else. As friends, we're very comfortable with each other, so maybe that made things easier with that situation.

    I could try to be mindless and set out to take out my sexual frustrations on some other guys, but my mind wouldn't be there, tho I would be physically. Then, at this point, I don't think I'd be comfortable with anyone else, or have the connection I do with him. I know where he's been (we talk about those things as friends), I know he's clean (and he knows I'm a virgin), and I know that we can keep it between us... just those things that make you comfortable in an odd situation. Then, it wasn't so detached that we fooled around, and then he got up and left... if that were the case, he wouldn't have been in my arms afterwards or on top of me kissin me for a while after. I just think we both knew that it couldn't have been like that with any other guy for him or any other guy for me.

    I hope that time does help this. Being so antzy is kinda fun in a way, but at the same time, it's so out of character for me, and it worries me sometimes. And it's a trip... it's mostly because of a guy. The 3some situation had a big part to do with it, but my one-on-one sessions with him had a bigger part to do with it. If I do decide to branch out as a fix of sorts, yes, those guys will be in for an awakening... I have lots of tension to release, haha!
     
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